


I don't want to want you

by Saddith



Category: Kuroshitsuji | Black Butler
Genre: Abuse, Anal Sex, Angst, Blow Jobs, Drug Use, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Hand Jobs, M/M, Romance, Strip Tease, Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-30
Updated: 2016-03-16
Packaged: 2018-03-18 18:47:07
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 25
Words: 81,215
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3580059
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Saddith/pseuds/Saddith
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>[AloisxCiel College AU] An eighteen year old and seemingly straight Ciel Phantomhive meets a one year older boisterous and very gay Alois Trancy. That poor soul.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> How will Ciel react when an obnoxious and annoying blonde pervert gets obsessed with him?
> 
> Prepare for angst, romance, fluff, and of course, smut.

”Please, Lizzy… don’t stop.”

Ciel’s voice echoed through the small room that was his new living quarters. He conveniently shared his dorm with his best friend Finnian, but at the time his friend was out shopping with his girlfriend Mey-Rin. These past few weeks had been exhausting and Ciel was in dire need of a well-deserved break. A break involving his pretty, blonde girlfriend.

“Mmffh.”

The muffled noises caused by their activities filled the room, not that Ciel was very loud, but due to the silence around them, he might as well have been.

“Faster.”

Lizzy’s hand stroked him in a rapid speed causing him to squirm on the sheets. With a final cry he spilled his seed over his stomach and all over Lizzy’s hand. He gazed up at her through half-lidded eyes with a content smirk painted on his face. She chuckled softly and placed a chaste kiss on his forehead.

“I’m going to go clean up. Don’t pass out,” she teased before jumping off the bed and walking out the door. Ciel was still in a blissful haze, panting in the mess of bedlinens. He finally reached out to open the drawer next to his bed to pull out a tissue. He cleaned himself up and buttoned his blue shorts in slow motion. He laid there for a couple of minutes, almost drifting off into a well-needed nap, when his phone rang. The disturbingly loud noise ripped through the wonderful silence and irritation quickly washed over Ciel. With a groan he reached out to the nightstand and grabbed the vibrating device, sliding his finger over the screen.

“What do you want?”

“Rude,” came a deep voice on the other end.

“Sorry, Sebby. I was taking a nap,” Ciel told his older brother while dragging a hand through his greyish-blue mane.

“I told you not to call me that,” Sebastian reprimanded calmly. Still, Ciel could hear the slight irritation that Sebastian tried to hide.

“Whatever.” Ciel smirked, hoping to draw a reaction from his sibling. He sat up on the edge of the bed, stretching out his limbs. He was sure his brother would drag him out of the door one way or another. He might as well get ready. He heard a faint snort on the other end before his suspicions were confirmed.

“I’m taking you out for coffee. I found this delightful shop just outside campus. I’m sure it would be to your liking.” Sebastian’s voice was composed and calm, as always. Ciel stood up and walked over to the small mirror next to the window. He made a big effort in placing the disheveled strands of hair in their right place. He was quite meticulous with his appearance.

“You know I don’t drink coffee.”

“Tea, then. I’m outside.”

“I’m sure you are,” Ciel murmured, not at all surprised that his brother just assumed he would say yes. Somehow he always seemed to know what Ciel was doing, or not doing, and it was both annoying and endearing at the same time. That is the life of a younger brother, Ciel figured. Always being carefully monitored.

Ciel ended the call before lacing his black sneakers. Just as he finished he heard the door to his dorm open.

“Ciel, I’m sorry it took a while. I ran into-“ Lizzy stopped mid-sentence to eye Ciel as she realized he was heading out. “Are you going somewhere?” she asked with a frown.

“Sebby’s here. He’s forcing me to do stuff,” he said with a shrug.

“Can I come? Please, Ciel!” Lizzy squealed. Her high pitched voice made Ciel flinch.

“Uhm, I think he wants some alone time with me. We haven’t really been alone since I moved here,” Ciel murmured while pulling on his navy blue jacket. He noticed Lizzy’s pouting lips and let out a sigh. “I promise to come by your dorm later, okay?” He placed a small kiss on her lips before passing her and walking out the door. He could hear a faint “Okay…” before he closed it behind her.

Sebastian and Ciel walked in a comfortable silence all the way to the small coffee shop outside of campus. Sebastian was indeed correct in his assumption that Ciel would approve of the atmosphere that engulfed him when he stepped inside. The interior reminded Ciel of a time before computers, before iPhones, before all the modern things that Ciel in many ways despised. The colors were dark, but not too dark, and the walls were cold stone.

Ciel took a seat at a small table in the back while Sebastian went to buy their beverages. He placed his elbow on the table and rested his chin in his hand, lost in mindless thoughts. He was glad to be there with his brother; it had been too long. Aside from bickering about everyday things, like brothers often do, they got along very well and their bond was strong. It had only gotten stronger after their parents had passed away in a car accident three years ago. Ciel had been allowed to stay with Sebastian, who had been 19 at the time and had had his own apartment. For three years they did their best to manage despite their grief, and they had gotten through it together.

The image of his parents faces flashed through Ciel’s mind and a lump formed in the pit of his stomach. He shook his head in a faint attempt to get the images to disappear but he knew they wouldn’t. They always popped up when he let his mind drift off, something he had made a habit of avoiding. As much as he missed his parents, it still hurt to think about them. He jumped in his chair when Sebastian sat down across the table in a rough manner.

“Did I scare you?” he sniggered, placing a teacup in front of Ciel.

“No, I was just-“ Ciel was cut off by someone laughing loudly a few tables away. The laughing boy had his eyes squeezed shut and his cheeks were tinted with a light pink shade. He had messy blonde hair framing his face and his mouth was open in a wide smile. He slammed his hand on the table and wiped away the moist gathering in his eye with his other hand.

The older white-haired girl across from the blonde boy looked horrified by the scene he was making and tried to shush him. The blonde boy didn’t seem to care as he waved his hand in her direction and continued whimpering between breaths. Ciel caught himself staring and quickly turned to face his brother. Sebastian only shook his head and took a sip from his coffee mug.

“Do you know him?” Ciel raised an eyebrow and met his brother’s gaze.

“I know of him,” Sebastian sighed and grabbed his hot mug with both of his hands before continuing. “His name is Alois Trancy. Somehow he manages to keep himself from getting kicked off campus but in my opinion this place would be a lot more pleasant without people like him.”

 “What, does he disturb classes or what? Party a lot?” Ciel’s eyes could not hide his curiosity.

“Both, I guess. And his parties always get out of hand.”

“Have you been to one?” Ciel asked with wide eyes as a smirk played on his lips. He couldn’t imagine his brother drunk at a wild party. He was always so composed and well-mannered, but Ciel had seen his wild side once or twice so he guessed the possibility of his brother attending parties wasn’t that far-fetched.

“Once,” Sebastian answered simply before changing the subject. “How are your teachers treating you?”

Ciel didn’t register the question; his eyes had found their way back to the blonde boy.

Alois Trancy.

His cheeks became painfully hot when the blonde boy turned to meet his gaze. His eyes were a piercing sky-blue that could make anyone sway where they stood. Ciel let out a small gasp and quickly turned away. Sebastian frowned and couldn’t help but notice the crimson that colored his cheeks.

“Didn’t I teach you not to stare?” Sebastian scolded.

“Sorry… I... I-“

“Stay away from him, Ciel. I mean it,” Sebastian lectured, shooting him a serious look.

“I intend to,” Ciel assured him while looking away, still embarrassed that he was caught staring. He had no idea why he had done so, but he couldn’t deny that he was fascinated by the blonde boy. He seemed to lack any decency, and was apparently downright crazy. Living with Sebastian had kept Ciel from indulging in such behavior and in many ways he was thankful for that, but as a teenager he was intrigued by the thought of having an untamed friend like Alois.

Sebastian seemed pleased with Ciel’s words and proceeded by questioning him about school. Their mindless chit-chat was calming, familiar, and Ciel felt content were he sat. He was glad that his brother had suggested this little excursion to take his mind of his new life as a college student. He didn’t care that Sebastian mostly talked about school-stuff, so long as he could listen to his soothing voice.

Finnian was Ciel’s best friend, but his brother had a special place in his life, in his heart, that none could measure up to. He would always prefer the company of his brother before anyone else. For a long time they had only had each other and their relationship was beyond deep. They hadn’t spent time together in weeks and Ciel hadn’t realized how much he had missed it. A half hour passed and Ciel felt a pressure below his waist that desperately needed his attention. Too much tea.

“I’m going to the bathroom,” he said before standing up and looking around for a couple of seconds before he found the door that he was looking for. He started walking towards the bathroom when he felt eyes on him. He turned slightly to find that the eyes staring at him belonged to the blonde boy only a few feet away. He wanted to ignore him but his body refused to obey and once again their eyes met. Ciel came to a halt and for a second he thought that Alois was going to say something. But he didn’t. Instead the side of his lips turned up in a mischievous smirk. Ciel’s mouth fell open a bit as he got entranced by the older boy’s unseemly expression.

He heard a cough coming from behind him and the spell broke. He muttered an apology before letting the old man pass him in the cramped space between tables. He then turned around to pick up where he left off and slowly walked towards the bathroom with a hand pressed to his forehead.

Another half hour passed and Ciel was getting a bit restless. Just as he was about to ask his brother if they could head back to the dorms he noticed that Alois was standing behind Sebastian. He let out a small gasp that Sebastian thankfully didn’t notice. He gave the blonde boy a questioning look but instead of an answer Alois only gave him a playful smile before spinning around to follow his (girl?)friend who was heading towards the exit. They left and Ciel could only shake his head in confusion. _Who acts like that?_

Ciel caught Sebastian’s attention and suggested that they could continue hanging out in his dorm and Sebastian gladly agreed. He was excited about seeing Finny again; he hadn’t seen most of Ciel’s friends in weeks. Sebastian kept babbling about Finny, Mey-Rin and Lizzy the whole walk home but Ciel only had one thing invading his mind. He couldn’t get the picture of Alois’ smirk out of his head.

_Who are you, Alois Trancy?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> More action coming up~


	2. Chapter 2

“Ciel Phantomhive.”

The voice coming from behind him belonged to a boy. His name was spoken in a sultry, yet playful tone that sent shivers down his spine. _Who_ … Ciel spun around in his chair to face the person who the voice belonged to and was surprised to find himself staring into those captivating blue eyes again.

Alois walked closer until he was standing beside Ciel, leaning his elbows against the cafeteria table. His eyes held emotions that Ciel couldn’t place, but his lips were curved up in a beguiling smirk that showed nothing but curiosity. Ciel was marveled by how this boy could look playful, bored and entranced at the same time.

“Enjoying your lunch?” he asked before picking up a piece of meat from Ciel’s plate, looking it over in his hand and then shoving it in his mouth. “Not bad,” he continued.

Ciel had no words for the older boy; he could only stare with his jaw in his lap. He was not used to people being this… comfortable around strangers.

Alois swallowed and frowned in Ciel’s direction. “Are you mute or something?”

Ciel snapped out of his paralysis and found himself stammering. “N-no. I just… W-what-“

“Never mind. If you can’t form a real sentence you might as well be,” Alois said then chuckled softly before walking away.

Ciel’s mouth was open and his eyebrows were high on his forehead. His friends looked at him with confused expressions. Finny was the first one to break the silence.

“Who was that?”

Lizzy opened her mouth before Ciel could answer.

“What’s with the booty shorts?” she taunted with a disgusted look on her face.

Booty shorts? Ciel had been too surprised to notice, and for some reason he was disappointed. Alois in booty shorts would have been an amusing sight, for sure. A guy wearing small shorts wasn’t exactly a common sight, especially not at school. Most guys would probably shoot themselves in the head before being seen in something like that. Although, if someone could pull it off, it would have to be Alois Trancy. With his seemingly shameless way of being it would almost be weird if his looks somehow didn’t project that.

“He’s just some guy. According to Sebastian, he’s quite a nuisance.” Ciel shrugged and poked at the meat at his plate with his fork.

“Wait a minute. He’s that Trancy kid right? I’ve heard of him,” Mey-Rin said with a glint in her eyes.

“Mmm,” was the only response Ciel could manage with his mouth full of mashed potatoes. He swallowed and continued. “Alois Trancy.”

“Hmm. I heard he’s gay,” Mey-Rin murmured and drifted off into her own thoughts with a dreamy smile.

Ciel almost choked on his food and looked up at Mey-Rin with wide eyes. “What?!”

“That explains the booty shorts.” Lizzy giggled with a wide grin and the others joined in, filling Ciel’s ears with their laughter and he couldn’t help but letting out a few chuckles himself.

The topic changed when the laughter died out and Ciel returned to the remaining food on his plate. His friends could be great when they wanted to and he was grateful to have them in his life. If not for them he didn’t know how he would have survived the loss of his parents that cold night three years ago. Sebastian was there for him, of course, but he had to work through his own grief.

Finny had practically lived with them for the first year and helped them with whatever they needed, not that they needed much other than support and a shoulder to cry on. Finny had a great shoulder, as did Mey-Rin and Lizzy. He couldn’t imagine a life without them.

* * *

_Two days later_

It was Saturday and Ciel had just returned to his dorm after spending some quality time with Lizzy. Finny had gone off somewhere with Mey-Rin and one of her friends and hadn’t come back yet, which meant that Ciel had the room all to himself.

He didn’t have any other plans for the day and decided to catch up on some schoolwork, but his mind kept drifting off. Ciel was a good and devoted student, but this particular afternoon he couldn’t seem to concentrate. Instead, he mindlessly scoured the web, checking his Tumblr and reading boring news before he ended up on Facebook.

One friend request.

He clicked the mouse once to reveal the name of the person who wanted to befriend him. He wasn’t expecting to see _his_ name pop up on the screen, but maybe he should have.

**Alois Bootylicious Trancy.**

_Bootylicious. Why am I not surprised?_

Before he could think about it he pressed the 'Accept' button. He clicked on the name and scrolled down Alois’ timeline. There was not much other than provocative photos of the blonde boy with some kind of bottle or glass in his hand in every single one of them. The newest one was posted by someone named 'Claude Faustus,' showing Alois in his tiny shorts sitting on a couch, with his thighs spread wide. He was holding a wine bottle and a sheepish grin covered half his face. His index finger was pressed against his lower lip in a seductive manner.

His upper body was partially covered by an unbuttoned dark green vest, showing of a pale, slightly toned chest. Thigh high black stockings rode up his slim legs and a large silk bow covered his neck. If that wasn’t enough, his outfit was completed with a pair of dark, high heeled boots with purple bows at the top. He was clearly not wearing that outfit in the cafeteria, Ciel would definitely have noticed.

_Is he some kind of cross-dresser or what?_

If it weren’t for the music pouring from the speakers he would have heard Finny entering the room and spared himself the embarrassment. Unfortunately that wasn’t the case. He almost fell out of his chair when he felt Finny’s hand on his shoulder and he did the only thing he could think of and covered the screen with his hands even though he already knew it was too late.

“It’s not what it looks like!” he squealed in panic.

Finny covered his mouth to hide a smile and his upper body was trembling but he didn’t say a word. Ciel couldn’t decide if that was better or worse but he decided to turn to the computer, clicking down the page and turning off the music. He stood up from his chair and grabbed Finny’s arm. He was still shaking with laughter and Ciel felt himself get angrier by the second.

“Stop laughing! I swear… I can explain!” His cheeks were bright red and flaming hot, his body was tense and a thin sheet of sweat covered his forehead. He would never hear the end of this. Mentally, he could hear his friends’ voices taunting him for years to come.

_“When Ciel’s all alone he likes to look at pictures of cross-dressing gay guys.”_

That’s what they would say, he just knew it _. Oh god_.

“Ciel! CIEL!”

He snapped out of his thoughts when Finny shook him by his shoulders. “I won’t tell anyone, I swear,” Finny promised in a calming tone.

“I just... He sent me a friend request. I was just looking at his timeline,” Ciel explained, hoping that Finny would believe him. Finny dropped his hands to his sides and met Ciel’s gaze.

“Ciel, you don’t have to explain. It was a just a drunk pic of one of our schoolmates. You’re overreacting.”

Ciel pondered on his friend’s words for a few moments before he realized that Finny was right. He felt a bit embarrassed for behaving like a drama queen but decided to let the whole incident go, now that he was sure Finny wasn’t going to spread a rumor about him being gay. Ciel wasn’t homophobic, but he was very protective when it came to his own image.

“You are so childish, Ciel. You know that, right?” Finny’s expression had changed from reassuring to one that looked more like irritation. He walked over to his bed and sat down, folding his arms.

“Yeah, I know… I shouldn’t be bothered by something like this,” Ciel agreed, to his own surprise. He let out a sigh and rubbed his forehead. A _ping_ broke his trail of thought and he glanced over at the computer-screen. He sat down in the chair in front of the screen with a small thud and clicked up the page. The half-naked picture of Alois flashed him once more and he quickly clicked on his own name, landing on his own timeline.

The small window in the right corner showed a familiar name. Of course.

**Alois Bootylicious Trancy:  
** _Ciel_

He had only written his name. Ciel decided to play along.  
  
**Ciel Phantomhive:**  
_Alois_  
  
**Alois Bootylicious Trancy:**  
_What’s your favorite ice cream?_

What? Was he being serious? Being a curious young man, Ciel wanted to see where this would lead so he answered Alois’ question.  
  
**Ciel Phantomhive:**  
_Chocolate_  
  
Alois logged off and Ciel scratched his head in confusion. He could not wrap his head around this boy’s behavior. Their short conversation was beyond weird but at this point he was no longer surprised.

“I’m taking a nap,” he said as he glanced over to Finny, who was sprawled out on his bed typing on his laptop. Finny didn’t answer him and he realized that he had his headphones plugged in. Ciel sighed and went to lie down on his bed and took a deep breath before closing his eyes.

Ciel woke up an hour later by a loud knock to the door. He rubbed his eyes and searched the room for Finny who was nowhere to be found. With a loud groan he sat up and yelled, “What?” There was no answer, and no one came in. Ciel let out an irritated sigh and dragged himself the short distance between the bed and the door. When he opened the door he was surprised to find out that whoever had knocked had left. He almost closed the door before his eyes landed on a small box that was placed on the floor in front of his feet.

Ciel bent down to pick it up and quickly pulled away again when the cold hit his fingers. Realization hit him and he picked up the carton of chocolate ice cream from the floor. There was a note attached to it.

**212**

What did that even mean? It was obvious who had left the carton of ice cream, but the note didn’t make any sense. Ciel shrugged and backed into his room and closed the door. As much as he didn’t want to get woken up he knew it wouldn’t be a good idea to sleep any longer if he wanted any chance of getting a good night’s sleep before tomorrow’s early classes.

He was happy about the ice cream though, even if it did come from a complete nut job.

Ciel cracked the box open and went to grab a spoon. While shoveling mountains of ice cream into his mouth he sat down on his bed and pulled his phone out of his pocket. He flipped through his contacts and pressed the call-button when he found Lizzy’s name.

“Cieeeel!” His name cut through his eardrum like a knife and he had to pull his phone away from his ear. He frowned and let out a small sigh.

“Hey, Lizzy. Nice to talk to you, too. Wanna come over and watch a movie or something?” he asked in a muffled voice due to the amounts of ice cream still in his mouth.

“Where’s Finnian? And shouldn’t you be doing your homework?” she lectured, earning a groan from Ciel. He jumped up a bit further on the bed and put his head down on the soft pillow.

“He’s probably _all alone_ with Mey-Rin somewhere.” He smirked as he heard Lizzy gasp on the other end.

“Ciel! Don’t say stuff like that!”

“You’re one to talk,” Ciel teased and licked the spoon with a smile.

Lizzy gave Ciel a snort before continuing. “If you won’t do any homework you should come over to Paula’s dorm. We’re playing some weird game on her X-box.”

“Sure. Where’s she at?”

“Room 331.”

“I’ll see you in ten.”

Ciel ended the call and licked the last bit of ice cream of the spoon before getting off the bed. He went over to the mirror and rubbed his eyes with his knuckles. His unique eyes stared back at him, one royal blue and the other deep purple. He dragged a hand through his dark hair and straightened his dark blue button-up shirt. Satisfied with the way he looked he strolled out the door to find Paula’s dorm. When he finally had found his way to her door, staring at the numbers marking it, he realized what the numbers scribbled on the note must mean.

_Does he want me to go to his dorm?_


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AAAH your comments! They brighten up my life and give me so much motivation! Thank you guys so much.

Ciel was putting away his empty tray, getting ready to leave the cafeteria when he saw a head of messy blonde hair a few tables away. Alois was sitting across from the white-haired girl from the coffee shop and a young boy with purple hair was sitting next to her. Determined to get some answers he walked over and sat down in the empty chair beside Alois with a loud bang. Ciel wasn’t angry with the older boy, but he was frustrated, mostly because no matter how much he tried, he couldn’t figure out why he was acting the way he did.

He wanted to know how he came to find out his name, and why he even bothered to do so in the first place. The whole ice cream-thing was another mystery that he would like to gain some insight to. Who leaves a carton of ice cream outside the door of a (almost) complete stranger? Ciel began to wonder if he even had a motive at all. He seemed weird enough to do such things just to mess with people’s heads.

“What a nice surprise,” Alois said, looking more aloof than anything else, with not so much as a glance in Ciel’s direction. He was poking around on his plate with a small spoon and when Ciel glanced down at the plate he didn’t find any real food on it, instead Alois seemed to be enjoying a large piece of cake with a cherry on top for lunch. Before Ciel could form the questions he wanted answered, the blonde boy picked up the cherry between his fingers and threw it across the table.

The cherry hit the white-haired girl right between the eyes with a small thud and then rolled down onto the floor. Some cream had splashed on her face on the impact but instead of lashing out at Alois, she simply picked up a napkin and started cleaning her face. Alois was clutching his stomach and laughed in such an unrestrained manner that the people sitting around the other tables turned to look at the spectacle.

Ciel couldn’t do anything to hide his horrified expression. He didn’t understand why the girl didn’t do anything; instead she just sat there in silence and let Alois treat her like shit. The same could be said about the boy with purple hair. He hadn’t said a word this entire time.

“W-why did you do that?” was all that Ciel managed to blurt out.

“It’s simple,” he smirked. “I did it because I wanted to.” He threw away the spoon and it slid across the table, leaving a trail of cream over the smooth surface. He shoved his finger into the cake and pulled it out to lick away the mixture of jam, crumbs and cream. He met Ciel’s gaze with a bored expression. “Why are you here?”

“Why am I here?” Ciel’s mind went blank for a second and he figured he must look like a fool.

“Yes, _Ciel_. Why are you here?” He returned to poking holes in the cake with his index finger.

With the mention of his name, Ciel got his trail of thought back and his face went stern as he began interrogating the older boy. “How do you know my name?” His tone was much harsher than he intended but Alois didn’t seem to be bothered.

“Well, Ciel, that’s not really the question here, is it?”

“Huh?”

“The real question is whether or not you like cake.”

“What do you-“ Ciel was brutally cut off when Alois’ finger found its way past his lips. His mouth was invaded by a cream-covered finger that probed around for a brief moment before being pulled out again. Alois looked utterly amused as he waited for Ciel’s reaction.

Ciel was frozen in place. He did not expect that, at all.

His head started to spin and his cheeks were burning with a blush that was spreading all the way to his earlobes. He had come here to get some answers but ended up with a finger in his mouth. _This is not happening_.

He forced himself to swallow before standing up and putting on his most stoic face. “Don’t come near me ever again.” The words were dripping with poison and he tried to look disgusted with the older boy, even though he was sure he wouldn’t care in the least.

“Whatever you say, honey.” He waved his hand dismissively but before Ciel could respond he continued with something Ciel never thought that he would say. “Your friends are coming to my party on Saturday. I want you to come, too. I promise I won’t go near you, but you can come near me if you’d like,” he said with a smirk while poking at his lower lip in a similar way he had done in the Facebook-picture.

At this point Ciel was trembling with anger. “I would never-“

“There you are!” Ciel was cut off by a familiar voice and he spun around to face his friend. Finny looked happy as usual and Mey-Rin and Lizzy were standing behind him with worried looks on their faces. While Finny seemed oblivious, the girls had definitely noticed that something wasn’t quite right, judging by the look on Ciel’s face.

“Alois, thanks again for inviting us to your party!” he chirped. Alois only smiled sheepishly in response.

“Ciel, what-“ Lizzy started but Ciel cut her off.

“Let’s go.” His voice was harsh and demanding and no one argued when he stormed out the cafeteria. His friends just gave each other confused looks before following him.

“Bye, Alois!” Mey-Rin called out on her way out.

###

“Ciel, why won’t you tell me what happened yesterday in the cafeteria? I’m your best friend!” Finny whined.

“Just let it go, Finny!” Ciel slammed his hand down on the desk causing Finny to jump in surprise.

“I will let it go if you come with us on Saturday,” Finny said with a mischievous grin, not affected in the least by Ciel’s outburst. He pulled his legs up from the side of the bed and folded his feet while letting his knees fall to the sides.

Ciel turned away from the computer and shot a murderous glare at Finny. “I would rather get eaten by a demon. Besides, Sebastian told me to stay away from Alois.”

“Fuck Sebastian!”

Ciel’s eyes went wide at the foul word that came out of his usually sweet and well-mannered friend’s mouth.

“You cursed.”

Finny flailed his arms. “Damn right I did! Ciel, come on, we’re in college now. Everybody goes to parties.”

“I know, I just don’t want to go to this particular party,” Ciel sighed, letting his gaze wander down to the floor. He was sick of this conversation.

Finny looked like he just had a brilliant idea but managed to speak in a calm tone when he said his next words. “You can have my vintage Gameboy.”

“No way!” Ciel knew how much that Gameboy meant to him. He must really want to go to this party. What could be so exciting about being around a bunch of obnoxious, drunk college students?

“Yes way.”

“I’ll think about it.”

Ciel meant it -he really wanted that Gameboy- but the memory of Alois’ rude and quite frankly, harassing behavior was still fresh in his mind and he badly wanted to refuse the offer. He wouldn’t though, not until he had thought it over properly.

The boys were interrupted by a knock on the door.

Assuming it was either Lizzy or Mey-Rin Ciel called out, “Come in!” and didn’t move at first. When the door didn’t open he repeated the words even louder but there was no answer. Finny had gotten up to his feet and was already heading towards the door.

When Finny opened the door there was no one to meet him which made him peek his head out and look around only to find the hall empty. He almost tripped over the small package on the floor in front of the door.

_Oh god, not again._

Finny returned with the small box and pulled off a small note that was stuck to it. Ciel had gotten to his feet and was reaching out to grab the note. He couldn’t care less about what was in the package, he just didn’t want Finny to read what was on the note. If it gave away that it was Alois who had left him yet another “gift” he was truly screwed. Then he had to explain the whole thing to his friend and that was completely out of the question.

Finny held the note up high; a few inches out of Ciel’s reach and glanced at him with narrow eyes.

“Why do you want it so bad? Who gave you this?”

Ciel realized that his behavior had already given him away and he cursed inwardly at his own stupidity.

“I’m just… curious.” He murmured, avoiding Finny’s suspicious gaze. “What does it say?”

Finny lowered his hand and seemed to be thinking something over in his mind for a moment before handing the note over to Ciel. He tried to look casual when he peered down at the small piece of paper in his hand. There was one simple word written on the note.

**Sorry**

Ciel wanted to groan but stopped himself before he made any sound. That would only lead to further questions. He wondered if Alois truly was sorry, or what his agenda might be for doing this. It was impossible to figure out what was going on in his mind and it frustrated Ciel to no end.

He was thinking about lying to Finny about who left the package. He didn’t want to lie to his friend, but he wasn’t up for talking about Alois right now, or ever. It only made him angry and he wasn’t up for having another embarrassing outburst again.

“Who gave you that?” Finny asked again, unable to hide the curiosity in his voice.

“It must be from Sebastian,” he lied. “We had a fight this morning. I guess he couldn’t stick around to apologize in person.” Ciel shrugged and went to pick up the package that Finny had placed on the desk next to the computer-screen. It was not ice cream this time, the box was too small. No, it wasn’t ice cream, but it was chocolate. Not the cheap kind either. Maybe he would consider forgiving Alois after all.

“That isn’t like him,” Finny muttered but didn’t linger on the subject when he caught sight of the content of the box. With inhuman speed he was over by Ciel and snatched a piece and shoved it into his mouth with a small moan. A small smile tugged at Ciel’s lips at the sight of his friend and he copied his actions. The chocolate was really good. He had to admit that Alois knew how to apologize.

The box was empty in no time and the two boys spent the rest of the evening catching up on some studying. They had both put it off for far too long. Finny was sprawled out on his bed, snoring loudly with an open book spread out across his chest. Ciel was preparing himself to go and wake him up when all he really wanted was to crawl under his own covers and fall asleep.

He dragged his exhausted body the short distance between their beds and pressed a finger into Finny’s shoulder. When he didn’t respond he increased the pressure until he was sure it had to be painful, but Finny only squirmed slightly and his snoring only became louder.

“Finny. Finny,” he repeated over and over until he finally saw his turquoise eyes open slightly.

“Okay, okay,” he muttered and sat up with much effort. He quickly undressed and put the book on the bedside table and turned to face Ciel, who had returned to his own bed and was about to snuggle up in the warm blankets.

“I know Sebastian didn’t give you the chocolate.”

“Shut up,” was all Ciel said before turning off the light on his bedside table.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can’t believe he gave him that note, right? 
> 
> You guys are going to LOVE the next chapter. It is truly bootylicious XD
> 
> AND GUYS.
> 
> I LOVE YOUR COMMENTS.
> 
> COMMENT.
> 
> (and give kudos ^.^)
> 
> See you next Thursday!


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It might not be Thursday where you guys live, but it’s 2.30am here and that’s enough for me.
> 
> And thank you so much for all the comments. You guys are truly wonderful.
> 
> The song in this chapter is Adam Lambert - Strut. To me, it’s kind of Alois’ theme song. I just had to include it somehow. 
> 
> If you'd like to discuss the fic or just check out some awesome Cielois stuff and other Kuro things:  
> My Instagram: @touch.me.trancy  
> My Tumblr: touch-me-trancy

“Wow… Ciel. You look great.”

Lizzy’s eyes went wide by the sight of her boyfriend in his selected outfit. He looked himself over in the mirror, patting away imagined dust from his dark gray jeans. A black v-neck t-shirt covered his torso and he completed the look with an unbuttoned navy blue blazer. On his feet he wore a pair of black leather boots with a low heel.

“You don’t look so bad yourself,” he pointed out and turned around to face his girlfriend. A small smile formed on his lips and he walked over to put his hands on her slender waist. He pecked her forehead and his hands found their way into her blonde locks. Her soft hair felt nice against his fingers. He let out a sigh and pressed her fragile head against his firm chest.

Yesterday evening she had told him that she loved him.

Love. Ciel had no idea what that word even meant.

They had been cuddling on Lizzy’s bed when she had confessed her true feelings. At first he had remained silent, but when Lizzy had crawled up to rest her head on his chest he had felt compelled to give her something, anything. The only problem was that he didn’t know what to tell her. After way to long he had opened his mouth only to close it again. Talking about feelings weren’t exactly Ciel’s strong suit.

“Thank you,” he had finally whispered into the silky curls on her head.

He was sure those were the wrong words, but he just couldn’t bring himself to say the ones he knew she so desperately wanted to hear. He wasn’t sure why, because he knew that he cared a lot about her, but it might be the fact that he thought that love was such a strong word, a word you shouldn’t throw around. Or maybe he simply didn’t love her.

Whatever the reason, the whole incident had made him uneasy and he wasn’t the only one. It was obvious that Lizzy was disappointed, even if she went to great lengths to hide it. He had known her for many years and by now he could sense even the slightest change in her behavior. He felt like a bad guy, even though he knew it wouldn’t have been fair to her if he had said the words without really meaning them.

He knew he had to figure it all out somehow. He considered talking to Sebastian about it, although Ciel had never really seen him with any girl. Not in a loving way, anyway. The most he had seen him do with a girl had been the occasional one-night-stand. His ability to seduce women was indeed one of his wilder traits.

His best friend Baldroy even claimed that Sebastian had seduced a nun at one point but he would never comment on it when anybody asked him. He would simply state that as a gentleman, he would never kiss and tell.

Nobody really believed that story but Baldroy made sure that it always found its way into conversations in some way or another. True or not, it was still pretty funny.

Ciel released his hold on Lizzy and took a step back. She looked up and met his gaze and gave him a smile, but it didn’t reach her eyes. Ciel sighed and placed her chin between his thumb and index finger. He bent down and pressed his lips against hers and he did his best to make the kiss as passionate as he could. He knew he had to show her that he cared about her, even if he wasn’t ready to utter those three little words.

They were interrupted by a radiating Finny and a cheerful Mey-Rin. They had been so excited when Ciel had agreed to go to the party. Why they acted like complete kooks about going to a party he would never understand, but he did enjoy seeing them in this mood. It made him forget that he would have to be in close proximity to Alois in a matter of minutes.

It weren’t long before they stood outside the big house. Apparently it belonged to Alois’ father and the fact that it only was a ten minute walk from campus made him wonder why Alois chose to live in a dorm. The house seemed big enough to accommodate a whole marching band and next to that, a dorm seemed like a real shithole. He didn’t have time to ponder though; his friends had no intension of waiting. They walked up to the door and Finny rang the doorbell. While they waited for someone to answer they heard music and a lot of voices coming from inside; although it was still quite early in the evening the party seemed to be going in full speed.

The purple haired boy from the cafeteria was on the other side of the door. He simply stepped aside and signaled for them to come inside. Being the loud and obnoxious person that Alois was, he sure had shy friends, Ciel thought. Like he was reading Ciel’s mind, the young boy reached out his hand towards him and gave him a wide smile.

“I’m sorry for not introducing myself the first time we met. I’m Timber.”

Ciel shook his hand and watched as the rest of his friends introduced themselves. They were showed to a huge room that was filled with people.

“If you want something to drink you can grab some beers from the fridge,” Timber offered while pointing in the direction of the kitchen. His eyes fell on someone in the crowd before he said, “I have to go. Excuse me.” A second later he had disappeared in the crowd. Ciel wasn’t really sure what he wanted to do, and he wasn’t sure about drinking beer either. Finny decided for him though, and went to grab beers for both himself and Ciel. The girls weren’t up for drinking at all, but Finny sure was and he didn’t want to drink alone. _Just this once_ ,Ciel thought.

With a drink in hand they made their way out on the terrace and found that there apparently was a pool too. _How could anyone choose a dorm over a huge house with a pool?_

People were dancing around the pool to familiar tunes and the overall mood seemed to be quite calm, but that could just be because the night was still young, Ciel figured. In comparison to other parties that Ciel had attended, this one didn’t seem any different. He wondered if Sebastian had exaggerated a bit when he said that Alois’ parties were wild and out of control.

Lizzy grabbed his hand and dragged him behind her to join their dancing friends. Ciel was a terrible dancer, but to please Lizzy he had to at least try. He was certain he looked like a penguin with a stick up its ass but judging by the look on Lizzy’s face it couldn’t have been that bad.

He took a sip from his beer and looked around at the dancing students with faint interest. Some were grinding against each other and others were looking just as awkward as him. Most of them seemed to be enjoying themselves. One person in particular seemed to be having a blast.

Alois was standing on the opposite side of the pool but he wasn’t dancing. He _was_ doing some grinding though. He also seemed to have his tongue shoved down the throat of a tall boy with black hair and glasses.

Mey-Rin had been right, he most definitely wasn’t straight.

Ciel couldn’t stop staring at the scene; he had never seen two guys kissing other than on television. His movements slowed until he was standing completely still. His friends noticed that something was distracting him and turned their heads in the direction he was facing. Mey-Rin started giggling like some overly excited five-year old but the other two seemed to be unaffected.

“Alois sure knows how to enjoy himself,” Finny laughed and returned to his previous actions. Lizzy shrugged and joined Finny in a wild dance that made them both look ridiculous. Mey-Rin covered her mouth to hide a smile and then told Ciel that she had to go to the bathroom. Ciel decided to join her, but he didn’t really need to go. He wasn’t sure why, but the sight of Alois with that guy made him feel uncomfortable.

A few hours passed by quickly and it started to become apparent to Ciel what Sebastian had meant when he said that these parties tended to get a little wild.

Décor got broken, people were puking in the pool and there were a couple openly having sex right on the floor in one of the bedrooms. One could wonder why they chose not to use the bed. In the living room a few girls had moved the coffee table that had stood in front of the couch so that it was standing in middle of the room. They stood on top of it, half-naked and dancing, with a crowd of boys surrounding the table and cheering them on.

Ciel had been separated from his friends a while back, but that didn’t bother him. He had other plans. He hadn’t seen much of Alois throughout the night. It seemed as if he was keeping his promise to stay away from Ciel. Somehow that made him annoyed; he couldn’t imagine that Alois would keep such a promise.

He didn’t know if it was the beer or some strike of idiocy that made him seek him up and confront him. He just felt so… frustrated. He wanted to understand why Alois had made contact with him in the first place. He wanted to know why he left him gifts. And for some reason, he wanted to know why he hadn’t talked to him, or even acknowledged him, during the party.

He found him in the kitchen, leaning against the counter next to some older girls. They were having a conversation apparently involving some movie, because they were all taking turns playing out a scene. Ciel recognized the scene; it was from some romance flick that Lizzy had made him watch a few weeks ago. It was called “Notebook,” or something like that.

He waited until they were done until he walked over to stand face to face with Alois. He had to take a few quick breaths to calm himself when he caught sight of the smirk twitching on Alois’ lips.

“Can we talk?” he asked, giving Alois an astringent look.

Alois completely ignored his question. “I thought you didn’t want me anywhere near you,” he said in a smug tone.

Ciel clenched his fists and gritted his teeth. “I don’t! I just want to know why you keep leaving things outside my dorm.”

“Because it’s fun,” he answered with a teasing grin.

Ciel rolled his eyes and leaned in closer, his irritation bordering on anger. “I’m starting to get real sick of your little game or whatever this is.”

“I’m not playing any games, and if I’m now allowed to be near you I would like to talk about this somewhere more comfortable, preferably the living room,” he insisted before grabbing Ciel’s wrist and dragging him off to the living room couch.

Ciel was in shock. He never expected Alois to give him more than a few insolent words, as usual. He was grateful though, and he wasn’t about to question it. He wanted –no he _needed_ \- to get some insight to how this boy’s mind worked.

“Well then, Ciel. I will tell you why I left you those gifts,” Alois started when they were both seated on the couch. He slid down to the point where his head was resting on the armrest and he pulled his feet up to rest on top of the cushion behind Ciel’s head. Ciel glanced back at his feet with a frown before turning his gaze back to Alois who’d opened his mouth again to speak. “To be honest, I find you quite interesting.”

Ciel had not expected that answer and now he didn’t know what to say. Instead, he said the first thing that came to mind. “Why?”

“I’m not quite sure myself actually.” He had begun sliding his torso further and further down the couch and his head was now hanging down over the edge and his legs were leaning straight against the backrest. His hands rested on his chest with his fingers intertwined.

“And my name? You knew who I was after that day in the coffee shop.”

“That was easy. I’m familiar with your brother, you know.” His hands had now dropped to the floor and was hanging limp on either side of his head. He didn’t seem all that interested in the conversation.

Ciel was just about to open his mouth again when Alois flew up from the couch like something had hit him. The expression he wore was one of total bliss and he shot his arms up in the air.

“This is my fucking song!” he yelled before closing his eyes and started moving to the beat.

The song had an alluring beat that moved in a fast pace, although Alois didn’t seem to have any trouble keeping up. His hips were moving side to side in a rolling motion and his hands found their way into his blonde mess of hair. He opened his icy blue eyes and stared straight into Ciel’s odd ones while biting down on his lower lip.

 _You got something to say_  
_Your hands are tied_  
 _Open your mouth, open it wide_  
 _Let the freedom begin_

Alois backed up against the wall and dipped to the floor, spreading his legs slowly. Ciel would have been ashamed of himself by the way his was shamelessly staring at the show but he couldn’t think straight. His mind was all jumbled and blurry by the amount of alcohol coursing through his veins.

Alois got on all fours and crawled towards Ciel and when he reached his numb legs he got up on his knees and started unbuttoning his deep red shirt in a seductively slow pace. Ciel hadn’t even noticed that his breathing had become ragged and that his hands were fidgeting nervously in his lap. The cheering crowd gathered around them didn’t catch his attention either. 

Alois threw away the shirt and got to his feet, with his chest now completely bare. He started moving his body to the fast beat and rolled his hips in a way that made Ciel’s skin prickle. Alois’ hands found their way to the front of his black pants with eyes glued to the younger boy sitting in the couch.

 _Get on the floor, just let it drop_  
_Don’t it feel good, don’t it feel hot?_  
 _Feel the fire within_

He slid the dark fabric down over his hips slowly and made an effort in pleasing the crowd.

Ciel’s mouth was hanging open and to his own embarrassment he actually felt a bit of drool trying to find its way down his lip. He quickly swallowed and tried to drag his sleeve over his lip in the most casual way he could manage. He wanted to think, he wanted to react, but he found himself stuck to the couch, completely dumbfound.

When Alois had kicked away his shoes, and pants along with socks were thrown somewhere unknown, Ciel noticed that the underwear he was wearing wasn’t exactly the sort you usually found on a boy his age. Not on a male of any age, actually.

The only piece of fabric now covering Alois Trancy’s body were a pair of purple silk panties.

The song had ended but Alois kept moving to the next song with amazing confidence. He moved closer and closer to Ciel with his lower lip placed firmly between his teeth. He dipped down in front of him and placed his knees on the floor between his legs, forcing him to spread them. Ciel’s heavy breathing seized for a moment when Alois placed his hands on his knees. When he met Ciel’s gaze he darted his tongue out and dragged it slowly along his upper lip.  
  
Ciel couldn’t breathe. It felt like his body temperature was rising by the second and sweat was starting to pour out all over his body.

_Oh no._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> He. He. He.
> 
> Sorry for leaving you with that for another week!
> 
> See you next Thursday and I promise that it will be worth the wait. Poor Ciel xD
> 
> Aaaand btw. Check out this youtube video. It’s Alois… dancing… *drool* Just picture him doing some of those moves in front of Ciel… mhm.
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6Y6PFadOffs


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Honestly, I can’t even begin to thank all of you who are following this story. You are just so wonderful and you all make me so happy with your encouraging words.
> 
> So, with that said… I give you a surprise update!
> 
> BUT, this chapter is not as fun as the previous ones I’m afraid. I hope you have read the tags and are prepared for what’s to come.
> 
> Enjoy!

Alois squeezed Ciel’s knees and used them as leverage to hoist himself up to a standing position. His crotch was hovering dangerously close to Ciel’s flushed face, only a thin piece of purple silk covering the sizable bulge. Ciel’s eyes went wide and he finally regained his sanity and grabbed Alois by the thighs and pushed him away with enough force to make the blonde boy stumble backwards.

“Get off me!”

Alois bent over, clutching his stomach as a roaring laughter bubbled up from his throat. The crowd surrounding them joined in, his infectious laughter spurring them on. Soon the whole room was filled with the sounds of drunken students taking enjoyment in Ciel’s humiliation.

He wanted to stand up, to punish Alois in some way, but he knew that his humiliation could have been much worse, and that thought held him back. If anybody would had noticed, if Alois had seen… He would have had to kill himself. A clear shot to the head would have been a blessing.

_What terrible deed have I done in my life to deserve this? It must be the alcohol, right? I don’t actually think… No. No, I do not._

Thankfully, no one seemed to have noticed the fact that Ciel’s jeans had become increasingly tighter. No one had found out that he had been turned on… by a guy.

To his great relief, that little problem was soon out of the world, as shame took over in his mind. He begged to all the gods that his friends weren’t somewhere in the room. As the laughter started to fade he searched the room with a few quick glances before Alois’ voice made everyone turn their attention to the blonde.

“Did y’all like the show? Well, now… I think it’s Ciel’s turn.” He smirked and grabbed the younger boy by the wrist and pulled him up off the couch. Alois sauntered over to where Ciel had sat and fell down with a thud. “Come on now, don’t be shy,” he grinned, looking incredibly pleased with himself where he half sat, half laid on the cushions.

The excited eyes on Ciel were burning into him and the whistles and cheers coming from every direction made his cheeks heat up like fire.

“In your dreams,” Ciel spat, poison dripping from every word.

“Yes,” Alois purred in a sultry voice and wiggled his eyebrows.

Ciel gasped and shook his head in shock by the blonde’s flirtatious behavior. He gritted his teeth as anger began clouding his mind, his fingers curling up into hard fists. He stood up straight and was just about to snap at him when a deep voice came from behind him.

“Stop taunting my baby brother, Alois. Don’t you have any manners?” Sebastian asked with a small smirk tugging at his lips. “Or clothes?” he chuckled with raised eyebrows.

“S-seba… Sebastian. What are you doing here?” Ciel gasped with eyes as big as saucers.

“Saving you from this pervert, apparently.”

“HAH! Who are you calling a pervert, Sebastian? I know a few-“

“Alois,” he warned in a dangerous tone. “I’m sure this party can go on without Ciel showing of his poor dancing skills in front of everyone… So if you’ll excuse us.” He grabbed Ciel’s arm and started walking, dragging him stumbling behind him. None of them spoke until they were standing on the sidewalk in front of the house. Ciel’s friends were already there waiting for them.

“Lizzy, Finny… Why?”

“We met Sebastian in there! He told us to wait outside while he went looking for you,” Finny explained with a small smile.

“But why would you leave? It’s barely passed midnight. Don’t you want to stay?” Ciel asked with a frown.

“Nah, after seeing Alois trying to seduce you, I think I need to go home and curl up in a ball,” he teased with a huge grin covering half his face.

Ciel’s face turned crimson in a matter of seconds and he covered himself up with his hands. “Oh my god. Did you two-“

“NO!” Mey-Rin cried in disappointment. “I can’t believe I missed it! I would seriously pay good money to see him strip. He’s so hot!” she said in a dreamy tone.

Ciel felt his stomach twist uncomfortably as he registered her words and he had to avert his gaze.

“We were out by the pool but I’m glad I was. Honestly, Mey… There is something terribly wrong with you,” Lizzy sneered with a look of pure disgust.

Finny laughed, obviously unbothered by the fact that his girlfriend had called another boy attractive.

“Let’s get you kids home.”

They all turned to Sebastian who had stood in the background, quietly observing, letting them finish their little bickering.

“I’m not a fucking kid!” Ciel snapped, still frustrated and embarrassed by the fact that all of his friends knew about the incident with Alois. Finny had even seen it.

“Of course you aren’t.” Sebastian’s lips curled up into a teasing smirk. “Let’s go.”

###

Alois didn’t bother to put his clothes back on; it wasn’t like he cared what anybody thought about him. In the corner of his eye he could see Claude walking up to him with furrowed brows. He turned around and looked up at the older boy with an indifferent face.

“You really enjoy torturing straight guys, huh?” Claude asked, looking both amused and disgruntled.

Alois tilted his head back and laughed. “I like torturing you too. Did you like my moves?” he purred, giving him a tantalizing smile.

“I would have liked it more if I was the one sitting in the couch.” Claude smirked and took a step forward, gazing at the blonde with lust in his eyes.

Alois chuckled and placed a hand on the front pocket of Claude’s jeans. He was desperate for something to distract him from the fact that he was in _severe_ trouble for throwing this party. When his father and younger brother returned from their trip, he knew he would have to atone for his disobedience, and he was really starting to regret this very stupid whim of his.

He knew he should have waited for Hannah’s parents to leave town and party at her house as they usually did, but it had simply been too tempting not to take the opportunity when his father finally had left town. He felt a shiver of fear rush through him and he raised his head to gaze into Claude’s golden eyes to try and find some sort of comfort.

Claude gave him a small smile and wrapped his arms around his waist and whispered, “So it’s time for that, huh?”

Alois nodded with a childish smile and they broke apart and walked into the kitchen. Alois signaled a group of boys to follow them and the small group gathered around the table.

Claude pulled out a small bag from his pocket and started pouring the content out on the table. One of the other boys handed him a dollar bill and a credit card and he proceeded to crush the small white pills and then separate the white powder into small, thin lines using the plastic card.

Alois grabbed the dollar bill and rolled it up so that it resembled a straw and leaned over the table to inhale the illegal substance. Claude smiled and snagged the bill out of his hold and copied his actions. The rest of the boys crept closer and almost formed a line in anticipation.

After all of the young men had each taken a turn at the table, none of them had any desire to move for the following twenty minutes. They sat like sacks of potatoes in the chairs around the dinner table and not one of them noticed when someone walked into the room.

“Alois.”

Sebastian’s voice made the blonde jolt straight upwards and he turned in his chair to meet his gaze with half-lidded clouded eyes.

“You’re back for some fun, huh?” he spluttered with a dumb smile. “There’s some left for y-“

“No, I’m not. I’m here to tell you to stay away from Ciel. He doesn’t need _this_ sort of thing in his life.”

A quick flash of something that resembled pain darkened Alois’ eyes before he returned to his former happy self. “But Seeebby. I like your baby brother. I like him so much, like pudding,” Alois chuckled, noticing that Claude’s face went stern across the table. “Not as much as I like you Claudie-claud. I prooomise.”

Sebastian let out a sigh of exasperation and dragged his fingers through his raven mane. “You’re embarrassing yourself, Alois.”

Alois shot his lip out in a pout and narrowed his eyes at Sebastian. “Okay, I’ll leave the pudding alone. But I want you to stay; it’ll be just like old times, Sebby. Pleeease!”

“Goodbye, Alois,” Sebastian sighed before he turned around and left.

###

_Experienced fingers painted abstract patterns over his pale chest and his breaths came out as pants in the dark. Chaste kisses left a burning sensation on his slender neck._

_Hot…_

_The weight of the person on top of him, pressing him down into the mattress, was a comfortable reminder that he was exactly where he wanted to be. A hand found its way into his hair; soft fingertips massaging his sensitive scalp in tender motions._

_Ooh…_

_Warm air was blown into his ear followed by a barely audible moan, causing him to shudder. A tongue trailed down his abdomen, leaving a wet line behind. The throbbing between his legs nearly painful as the wet muscle flicked playfully over his left hip._

_Ah!_

_Then there was only wet, hot, indescribable pleasure._

Ciel’s eyes flew open with a gasp. His body was covered in sweat and the sheets surrounding him had become damp. When he lifted the covers to assess the damage he cursed between his teeth and fell back on the bed.

Now he had to go clean up and change his sheets. Again.

This was the third time he had had this dream in the past two weeks and it was starting to get to him. He had slowly begun coming to terms with the undeniable fact that he was irrevocably attracted to that blonde, irritating bastard. Because of that fact he had done his very best to avoid him at all cost, and with good results.

Although he _was_ fairly certain that he wouldn’t be able to avoid him if Alois had his mind set on indulging him with his company. With that in mind, Ciel couldn’t help but wonder if there was a reason to why he hadn’t harassed him in almost two weeks. The only time he had seen him these past weeks were a few days after the party, in the cafeteria. He had only glanced over in Ciel’s direction before quickly returning to his company. Besides from that, he hadn’t seen him at all.

After all he had seen from the blonde at this point, he wouldn’t have believed that Alois would leave him alone after what happened at the party. Even if it made Ciel’s job a lot easier, he was a bit disappointed. He despised him, he did, but in some odd way, some part of him enjoyed the attention.

And apparently, some part of him enjoyed his appearance as well.

Ciel groaned and crawled out of the bed with much effort. He grabbed a pair of clean underwear and pulled on his pajama bottoms and was just about to reach for the door handle when he heard Finny’s sleepy voice coming from somewhere in the darkness.

“Bad dream?”

“You have no idea…” he muttered.

He heard a faint chuckle and some shuffling in the bed opposite to his own. His eyes were starting to adjust to the darkness and he could see Finny hoisting himself up to rest on his elbows, with half-lidded eyes locked on his scrawny frame. A wicked grin started to form on his lips and Ciel got a really bad feeling.

“ _Ooooh oohh,”_ Finny moaned tauntingly _._

Ciel’s mouth fell open and he clenched his fists on pure instinct. “Oh, for fucks sake! Will you give it a rest already?” He squeezed his eyes shut and took a deep breath when he felt that familiar heat rise to his face. This wasn’t the first time his friend had teased him over moaning in his sleep.

“Sorry Ciel…” He tried to sound sincere but Ciel could hear the childish grin on his lips when he said it. “Do you want to talk about it?”

“NO!” He turned around, grabbed the handle and stormed out of the dorm. He slammed the door shut behind him and strolled of towards the bathrooms.

After cleaning up he leaned against the sink with one hand holding on to each side of the cold porcelain. He looked at himself in the mirror, observing a hint of darkness marking the underside of his big eyes. A tired sigh left his lips and he moved one hand to press against his forehead.

“What is wrong with me?” he whispered into the silence.

A small noise came from one of the stalls followed by a surprised mention of his name. “Ciel?”

Ciel swirled around, his heart pounding like a vicious hammer in his chest. “W-who’s there?”

The door to the stall opened and revealed the tall boy that kept haunting Ciel’s dreams. He was wearing a white shirt that looked like it was several sizes too big and although it was buttoned all the way up it had slid down to uncover one of his slender shoulders. He didn’t have any pants on, but the shirt was so large it almost went down to his knees.

They stood there with eyes locked on each other for a few moments without saying a word. Alois’ eyes were swollen and red as if he had been crying, or had had a really rough night.Despite of his loathing, he found the sight of him troubling, but Ciel had no intention in finding out what he had been doing; he needed his own questions answered.

A small smile tugged at Alois’ lips and he took a step forward. Before he could say anything, Ciel opened his mouth and asked the one thing that had been bugging him for days.

“I haven’t seen you in almost two weeks. Where have you been?”

Alois looked surprised and raised one eyebrow. ”I have been staying away from you.” He spoke of it like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

Ciel shook his head in confusion. “Staying away from me? Why?”

“Ask your brother.” Alois shrugged and casually raised one hand to check his nails before placing his index finger between his teeth to start biting at the nail.

“Sebastian?”

Alois pulled the finger out of his mouth and raised his head enough to meet Ciel’s gaze. “He just cares about you. He thinks I’m bad company and I guess I have to agree with him on that,” he explained with another shrug. “I respect your brother, Ciel… But I don’t want to stay away from you.”

Why would Sebastian do that? It didn’t sound like him. Ciel felt like someone else was controlling his life and he needed more information. He needed to know why his brother would go to such lengths to keep him away from Alois. “I don’t understand… Why-”

Suddenly he found himself pressed up against the cold tiles. Strong hands held him in place, one placed on his chest and the other firmly gripping his bicep, holding his arm up over his head. Ciel was trembling by the time Alois’ fingers trailed upwards, over the sensitive skin on his arm until he found his wrist and held on tight.

Alois leaned in closer, until their noses were touching and their hot, heavy breaths mingled. Their lips were only millimeters apart when he whispered, “I want you, Ciel Phantomhive.”

Ciel’s heart skipped a beat when he words reached his ears and his lower lip started to tremble.

“Alois…” The name came out as barely a whisper. They stayed like that for a few short breaths, staring into each other’s eyes. Ciel almost felt like his brain had been carved out as everything around him became a blur. Some part of him knew what was about to happen and he wanted to push Alois away, but he didn’t have control over his limbs anymore. Nothing made any sense anymore.

He was about to get kissed, he knew that, but somehow he couldn’t move to stop it. The hands that held him in place were sending sensations through him that made him shudder. The body pressing against his was solid and warm and it reminded him about his dreams, but in his dreams they had never kissed.

Soft lips suddenly brushed against his own and a hot puff of air left them as Alois leaned forward just slightly and pressed their lips together in a fiery kiss.

There was a thought gnawing somewhere in the back of Ciel’s head that kept him from losing his mind completely as the older boy worked his lips against his. In the haze caused by mixed emotions and unexplored sensations, the thought was becoming louder and louder in his brain until the picture finally became clear _. I have a girlfriend and here I am, kissing Alois; I’m making out with a guy!_ His limbs were once again responding to his will and he grabbed Alois’ shoulders and pushed him away with all his might.

“What are you doing, you fucking pervert?” he yelled between pants. His voice cracked and tears were threatening to break free in the corners of his eyes. Ciel had never been more confused, never been angrier, but these feelings were not directed towards Alois; they were directed towards himself. Still, he felt like all of this, all that he felt, was somehow Alois’ fault.

Alois was standing a few feet away, bent over and clutching his thighs. He was slightly out of breath and Ciel couldn’t place the feelings in his eyes, but if he had to guess he would say that he almost looked like he was hurt.

“C-ciel… I… I…”

“I don’t want this! I’m not like you!” He was shouting and his voice came out sounding desperate as panic flooded him. His gaze fell to the floor as he whispered, “I have a girlfriend…”

Alois was silent for so long that Ciel finally raised his head in slight confusion. All of the previous emotions that had made Alois seem like he was hurt were gone now. Instead his face looked like it was made of stone and his eyes were cold as ice.

“Fuck you.” The words were spoken with finality to them, and he turned around and left, leaving Ciel alone in the cold room.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you liked the surprise update!
> 
> None of you were expecting something like this, right? XD
> 
> See you on Thursday!


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone, it’s Thursday again (here anyway)!
> 
> I keep praising you guys but you deserve it! You’re all wonderful! Thank you so much for the lovely comments. They make me dance around like a complete idiot in pure joy! Just some weird information no one really needed to know… but yeah! On with the chapter! I hope you all like it!

It was early in the afternoon and Ciel sat perched on the side of his bed while the minutes ticked by. He was trying to study but the events from last night kept invading his mind, poking at him whenever he tried to concentrate. Finally he decided to give up and address the issue in the only way he could think off. He had to talk to Finny.

He would have preferred to discuss something like this with Sebastian, but he didn’t want to admit to him what had happened, and for some reason he didn’t want to sell Alois out, despite what he did. He sighed loudly and raised his head just enough to lock his eyes on the strawberry-blonde boy across the room.

“Finny.”

Finny glanced up from the book he was reading. “Yes?”

Ciel swallowed hard and hesitated for a second before deciding to be brutally honest and just spill it all out at once. “Alois kissed me.”

Finny froze on his place on the bed and his expression changed from one of slight interest to one of complete bewilderment. “What?” He sat up and turned all his focus to Ciel.

“I didn’t kiss him back,” he murmured, averting his gaze, afraid that Finny would see the lie on his face.

“Why? I mean… Do you like him?”

“NO!” That was the last thing he expected his friend to ask and he was completely taken aback.

“But… back up a little. How did this even happen?”

Ciel sighed deeply and told him the whole story as best as he could and his hands began fidgeting nervously in his lap as he considered the possibility that his friend might tell someone about the incident. It would be a complete nightmare if Lizzy found out; she would most definitely seek Alois out and cause a scene. The picture flashed though his mind and made him cringe as an unpleasant shiver ran down his spine.

“I see…” Finny seemed to ponder on something and his gaze drifted off.

Ciel furrowed his brow, despising the fact that he had to speak about this at all, but he knew that he needed to talk to _someone_. He needed to get this off his chest and he needed to get some perspective. “Finny, I hate to admit this, but I could really use your advice.”

Finny’s eyes were back on Ciel, a frown evident on his face. “Everybody asks their friends for help, Ciel. What kind of advice do you need?”

“I know but…” He paused and buried his face in his hands for a few short moments before meeting Finny’s curious eyes with an austere look on his face. “I want to know how to get rid of him.”

Finny raised his eyebrows. “But you don’t want to get rid of him.” He spoke the words with such certainty it made Ciel shake his head in confusion.

“What?”

“You like him,” Finny simply stated with the same sureness as before.

Ciel froze up completely as he realized what his friend was saying. He flew up from the bed, furious that his friend would claim such a thing. “You’re crazy! I’m not gay, Finny.”

“I kno-“

“Then stop! I don’t like him, get it through your thick skull and shut up!” Ciel shouted the words at his friend, flailing his arms like a madman. He immediately regretted his outburst the moment the last syllable left his lips and slowly lowered both his gaze and his arms, trembling slightly by the adrenaline coursing through his veins.

“Ciel… You don’t have to be so rude.”

Ciel felt shame crash over him as the troubled tones reached his ears and he stood quietly in his spot for a moment, feeling his cheeks heat up like fire.

“Sorry,” he murmured, not taking his eyes off the floor. He was embarrassed by his own behavior and he had no desire to see the worried expression on Finny’s face. This was exactly why he never wanted to talk to him about complicated matters like this. He always said things that agitated him, causing him to throw a fit. The results were always that Ciel felt like the worst person in the world, although he knew that he probably deserved to feel like that sometimes.

A few seconds passed before Finny opened his mouth again to speak in that troubled tone that Ciel knew he would have. “Just listen to me for a sec, okay? I’m not stupid and I’m pretty good at putting pieces together. The gift, the dreams.” Finny paused and waited for Ciel to look at him, which he finally did when he mentioned the dreams. “You have been calling his name in your sleep.”

“Wait a minu-“ Ciel started but Finny cut him off.

“No, Ciel. I know something’s been going on and I won’t sit by and let you ruin yourself over this.”

Ciel felt himself get defeated at every turn and despite that his whole body told him to reach out and strangle Finny for his new set of aggravating words he had to admit that some of what he was saying had some truth to it. “I’m with Lizzy,” he murmured, his gaze turning to the floor once more.

Finny sighed and slid off of the bed and went up to stand beside Ciel. “I know… And I also know you don’t want to hear this, but you have to figure this out before someone gets hurt.”

Ciel turned to face his friend and groaned loudly before he muttered, “I hate you.”

“No you don’t,” Finny smiled. “Wanna do homework outside? It’s chilly, but the sun is out.”

Ciel couldn’t help but smile back. “Yeah… sure.”

They grabbed their books and went outdoors and into the schoolyard. A sunny day was rare this time of year and a lot of students were sitting in the grass, trying to get that last bit of D-vitamin before winter really settled in.

They decided upon a spot under a tree and sat down, leaning against it as they got lost in their work. An hour passed by quickly and they moved around the trunk with the movements of the sun. They were suddenly interrupted by someone shouting angrily somewhere nearby. It sounded like a rather serious fight and they could hear people begging for whoever was involved to stop.

Ciel dropped his books in an instant when he identified one of the voices. He urged Finny to come with him and together they ran towards the small crowd seemingly surrounding two boys. He immediately recognized the tall boy with glasses that he had last seen with his tongue down Alois’ throat.

Alois stood face to face with the tall boy, shouting about something that Ciel didn’t understand. The older boy looked extremely tense where he stood across from Alois; clenching and unclenching his fists as more curses flew his way. He didn’t defend himself verbally, but it was clear that he was more than ready to become physical if Alois didn’t back off.

Unfortunately it seemed as if the blonde had no intention in doing so. Someone in the crowd was begging Alois to stop yelling, others seemed to want them to fight. Ciel felt compelled to do something, as did Finny, and they both ran up to the two boys. By the time they got there it was already too late. The loud thud had almost everyone gasping, except for two boys who began cheering.

Alois was lying in the grass, covering the side of his face with his hand. Silent tears ran down his cheeks and Ciel noticed a red spot of blood in the corner of his mouth.  

“Leave!” Ciel yelled at the tall boy without a shred of fear before he kneeled down beside Alois. All he could feel at the moment was a burning anger. Finny went up to the raven-haired boy and even though he was more than a head shorter his voice didn’t show any distress when he repeated what Ciel had said in a much calmer tone.

The white-haired girl that Alois had seemed to be friends with before, now grabbed the tall boy’s wrist and gave him a meaning look. “Claude… Let’s go.”

So that’s who Claude was.

Claude growled deeply between his teeth, but he didn’t argue, and the two walked away as the crowd scattered. Ciel put a small hand over Alois’ slightly bigger one and urged him to let go of his injured jaw. He let out a pained whimper and slowly let his hand fall down onto his lap. His cheek was already starting to swell and a blueish-purple mark was slowly spreading over the area.

“Come on, let’s get you straightened up,” Ciel offered in the most assuring way he could manage with anger still coursing through his veins.

Alois was quiet at first, and didn’t move a muscle. Tears continued to fall down his cheeks and after a few moments he shut his eyes with a pained expression. He grabbed onto Ciel and Finny quickly moved in to clutch Alois by his other arm to help him get to his feet. Ciel put one arm around his shoulders and tried to give him a comforting look.

“Y-you don’t have to d-do this. I know you h-hate me,” he hiccupped and his body started trembling slightly in Ciel’s embrace.

“No,” Ciel stated in a firm tone.

Alois turned to face Ciel with big eyes and those icy blue orbs sparkled like diamonds in the sunlight.

“I don’t hate you.”

“R-really?” he squealed with glimmering eyes at Ciel. He looked like a child who had just found out that he was going to Disneyland. Ciel sighed and rubbed his forehead in both confusion and exasperation.

“I thought you were mad at me,” Ciel muttered.

“I was… but then I realized that I might have earned those words you threw at me…” he murmured with his eyes fixed on the ground.

Ciel felt his cheeks heat up and had to avert his gaze when he realized that the blonde tried to apologize for how he had treated him.

“Let’s go back to our dorm. We’ll patch you up,” Finny offered with an encouraging look.

Alois looked like he was thinking it over before he answered in a small voice, “Okay...”

They walked in silence until they were back in the dorm. Finny went to get an icepack and Ciel was cleaning away the small bit of blood that had gathered in the corner of Alois’ mouth. He flinched at the initial contact but Ciel’s gentle movements had him slowly relaxing on the edge of the bed.

“What were you two fighting about?” Ciel asked carefully, not daring to hope for Alois to give him a truthful answer.

“I don’t want to talk about it,” he murmured, flinching again when Ciel carefully patted his injured lip with the wet cloth. “I’m tired...”

“You can sleep if you want.”

“Can you hold me?” he pleaded softly.

“No,” Ciel answered with finality.

Alois looked like his whole world fell apart. Tears began to form in the corner of his eyes and Ciel felt bad for him. He had no desire to cuddle with the guy who had kissed him against his will as recently as last night, but he did feel like he had to do something to comfort him. His thoughts were interrupted when Finny entered the room with a bag of ice. He handed it over to Alois with a small smile. His gaze then travelled to Ciel and he shot him a look that Ciel wanted to hit him for.

Alois mumbled a barely audible “Thank you,” and curled up into a ball on Ciel’s bed, holding the ice tight against his swollen cheek. He began trembling again and Ciel felt confused as to what he should do. He wouldn’t hold him, he just wouldn’t, and especially not when Finny was in the same room.

Like Finny could read his mind he grabbed his phone and headed towards the door. Ciel gave him a both questioning and pleading look. _Don’t you dare leave me alone with him, Finny._

“I promised Mey I would hang out with her today. Have fun!” he chirped, but Ciel could see the smirk tugging at his lips.

He was out of the room quicker than a speeding bullet and Ciel was left alone sitting on the side of the bed with Alois curled up in the sheets beside him. He wondered if he had already fallen asleep and glanced over at the blonde boy’s face. He looked terrible. He had placed the icepack on the bed and was resting his head on it like a pillow, and even though his bruised face was facing the bed you could still see the swelling. A thin sheet of sweat covered his forehead despite the cold ice that was pressing against half of his face.

Ciel felt uneasy at the sight of him. He looked so fragile and hurt. Before he could think about it he crawled up beside Alois and lay back beside him. Ciel’s body was stiff as a board and he tried his best to not let his body touch Alois’, but it wasn’t easy considering that his bed wasn’t very big. His arm accidentally brushed against Alois’ hand, who let out a barely audible whimper and opened his eyes just a tiny bit. A small smile tugged at his lips and he pressed himself closer to the wall to make more room for Ciel.

They lay there in silence for several minutes before Ciel felt light fingertips brushing the palm of his hand. The touch was so subtle he had to glance down to check if he had imagined it. Alois’ fingertips were indeed touching him, and Ciel had to admit it felt nice. He carefully glanced over at the older boy, trying not to make it noticeable that he was looking. Alois’ eyes were closed and his lips were curved up in a blissful way that almost had Ciel smiling.

Almost.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So… what did you guys think of the ending?
> 
> Don’t forget to leave kudos :)


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Loved your comments last week and I see that some of you are craving some smut. Well… you will unfortunately have to wait a little bit longer. BUT…. I give you more cuteness. Enjoy!

_Where am I?_

Ciel shot up from the bed and shook his head back and forth, blinking rapidly trying to get his eyes to adjust to the dark, the room creeping into focus one blink at a time. It was night out, and someone had turned off the lights in the room. Ciel relaxed at the realization that he was still in his dorm. The dream that had woken him up had him perplexed, and even though the dream affected him to such an extent, he could only remember tiny fragments.

He remembered feeling anxious and frightened as someone was holding him down. No, several people were holding him down. He felt a slight tremor rattle his body as the scattered images flashed through his mind and he closed his eyes in an attempt to calm himself down, feeling his body slowly beginning to relax with each deep breath.

He heard snoring coming from the other bed and glanced over to discover Finny’s sleeping silhouette in the dark, tucked in by warm blankets. Ciel’s mind was still muddled from the brute awakening and he tried to go over the day in his head in an attempt to figure out how he had ended up here.

They had been studying… And Finny had tried to convince him that he liked Alois. _Oh god._ Ciel cringed at the memory before he continued to reminisce. They had gone outside where they had picked up an injured Alois and brought him back to their dorm. And they had fallen asleep…

Ciel gasped and looked over to his side. Aside from him, the bed was empty. Alois was gone. Had he still been here when Finny had returned? Had he seen them sleeping beside each other?

_My life sucks._

He couldn’t believe that he had fallen asleep; he hadn’t even been tired. He rubbed his eyes, slid of the bed and stood up on wobbly legs. Unsure of how late at night it was, Ciel grabbed his phone and checked the time. 11 PM. He had slept for seven hours. Ciel sighed deeply at his own carelessness and at the fact that he never would be able to fall asleep again. He scratched his head while muttering to himself and stumbled to the door. _Thank god it’s Saturday._

On the way to the bathroom the image of Alois’ swollen eyes from the night before flashed through his mind. He had been crying in the bathroom. _Why had he been crying? Did it have something to do with that Claude guy?_ He clenched his teeth as the thought made the anger want to resurface. With a deep breath, he quickly calmed himself down and got surprised when a sting of pity replaced the previous emotion. He found himself wishing that there was something he could do for Alois, something to make him feel better. This newfound compassion had him thoroughly confused to say the least.

He was heading back to his dorm when a thought suddenly hit him. He felt so bad for Alois, and for some weird reason that he couldn't explain he wanted to cheer him up, despite all that had happened between them over these past weeks. Somewhere deep inside he knew that there was a reason to why Alois acted the way he did, and he had a feeling that reason wasn't a good one. With that thought he decided to go against his very nature and help him out. Just this once.

By this point Ciel had realized that there was no escaping this boy. Whether they would end up as friends or not was irrelevant, Ciel was certain that Alois would be in his life in some way or another.

_Friends. That would work, right?_

He pondered on the idea for a while before giving up. This wasn’t exactly Ciel’s area of expertise, but he knew someone who might be able to help, and who might just be awake. He had been meaning to talk to his brother anyway, he had questions that needed answers. He dug his phone up from his pocket and began typing.

**Ciel:**  
_Are you up?_  
  
The answer came immediately.  
  
**Sebastian:  
**_Yes_  
  
**Ciel:  
**_Can I come over? I can’t sleep._  
  
**Sebastian:**  
_I’ll pick you up in 10  
_  
**Ciel:**  
_Sounds good_

Ciel went back to the room and fiddled with his phone until Sebastian sent another text, telling him that he was waiting outside. Ciel grabbed his shoes and jacket and went to meet him.

Sebastian’s black Honda was waiting on the curb and he walked up and opened the door on the passenger side. He sat down beside his brother and buckled up, inhaling the mixed scent of old car and air freshener. Sebastian glanced over to him as he drove off, as if he was waiting for Ciel to speak.

Ciel ignored his suspicious gaze and simply stated that he had had too much coffee, hoping that it would suffice as a satisfying answer as to why he couldn’t fall asleep. Sebastian gave him an understanding nod and they rode in silence the rest of the way.

Sebastian parked the car and they went inside his apartment building and rode the elevator up to his floor. He unlocked the door and signaled for Ciel to step inside before he walked in after him.

“Do you want something to drink?” Sabastian asked after he had finished getting out of his jacket and shoes.

Ciel, who still stood in the hallway, looked up at his brother nonchalantly and answered, “Nah, I’m good.”

Sebastian shrugged and went over to the kitchen to pour himself some water. He lived in an open plan apartment and therefor Ciel had no trouble hearing him when he asked, “So, what is the real reason you couldn’t sleep?”

Ciel flinched and furrowed his brow. “What are you talking about?”

“You don’t drink coffee,” Sebastian stated while filling up a glass with ice-water, the ice cubes clinking softly against the see-through material.

Ciel mentally slapped himself. Of course he would pick up on that. He decided to be honest, at least to some extent. Actually, he didn’t know why had felt the urge to lie in the first place; it wasn’t like he hadn’t fallen asleep during the day before.

“I fell asleep while I was studying and I just woke up.” He looked away and scratched his head, trying to look casual. “I know it’s irresponsible,” he added.

Sebastian leaned back against the counter with the glass in his right hand, raising one eyebrow at his brother. “I’ve done it several times, Ciel. Don’t worry about it. What do you want to do? Stream a movie? Bake a cake?” A small smile formed on his lips as he asked the last question.

Ciel laughed. Cake did sound good, but he went over to the TV and opened Netflix instead.

“Horror?” Ciel asked, glancing over the headrest of the black leather couch to meet his brother’s gaze.

“Sounds great,” Sebastian answered, still standing in the small kitchen while mindlessly checking his phone.

Ciel picked the movie _Sinister_ , which had something to do with a demon and children if he remembered correctly. He was certain that Sebastian would love it and was just about to call on his brother when he suddenly felt something soft brush against his arm. Ciel flinched in surprise and looked down to find a furry little creature trying to catch his attention. He almost fell off the couch in utter shock.

“Sebastian!” he shouted in panic. “When did you get a cat? You know I’m allergic!”

Sebastian ignored his outburst and answered him in a calm tone. “Oh. I forgot to tell you. I picked her up from the animal shelter a week ago.”

Ciel looked at the small cat with pure dislike and mock fear, leaning as far away from the animal as possible. “It’s going to kill me.”

“No, she’s not. She just wants to say hello,” Sebastian assured him in a delighted voice. “Say hello to Sutcliff.”

“Sutcliff?” he questioned with raised eyebrows. “I won’t touch that… thing.” The cat crept closer and Ciel cringed.

 “Oh stop,” Sebastian chuckled. “Say hello to her or I’ll make you watch a romantic comedy with Adam Sandler.”

Ciel sighed in defeat and reached out and dragged his fingers hesitantly through the cat’s tortoise-colored fur. Red and black hairs fell down onto his lap and he did his best to brush them off, disgust painted all over his face. The cat was purring loudly and she put her small paws on Ciel’s thigh and started to knead. The motion was soothing and he felt his lips involuntarily form a small smile that he quickly replaced with an indifferent expression. “It is maybe… a little cute,” he admitted.

“She’s gorgeous,” Sebastian smiled.

Sebastian walked over to the couch and sat down, picking up Sutcliff and placing her in his lap. She yawned and stretched out her front legs before curling up into a small, vibrating ball. Ciel pressed play and they watched the first half of the movie in silence, except for the occasional sneeze coming from Ciel.

“Hey, Sebastian?” Ciel finally asked, interrupting Sabastian’s enchanted staring at the large screen.

“Mmm, what?” he mumbled, reluctantly turning his gaze to Ciel.

“Why did you tell Alois to stay away from me?” Ciel asked in a firm tone, hoping it would tell his older brother what he thought of the fact that he had gone behind his back and interfered with his social life.

Sebastian blinked at the unexpected question. “For the same reason I told you to stay away from him,” he answered with a strict voice. “I don’t want you associating with people like him.”

“People like him? What’s wrong with him?” His voice came out sounding harsh but he didn’t care. He didn’t like the fact that Sebastian thought that he had some kind of right to decide who he included in his life.

Sebastian sighed and rubbed his forehead in exasperation. “Stop arguing, Ciel. Just trust me on this.”

“Why are you trying to control my life?” he barked, almost shouting and his face was flaming hot with sudden anger.

It was obvious that Sebastian’s patience was wearing thin. “I’m trying to protect you!”

Ciel narrowed his eyes and muttered, “I can protect myself.”

“I’m sure you believe that, but-“

“Sebastian, please. I want to decide for myself if he’s a bad guy or not.”

“Ciel, you-“ Sebastian started but Ciel cut him off.

“I don’t want to hear what you have to say. I’m eighteen years old and you can’t tell me what to do. Stop trying to protect me,” he appointed with a calmer expression.

Sebastian sighed in defeat and relaxed against the couch. “On one condition. Promise to tell me everything -and I mean everything- that you two do when you consort.”

“What? Why?” Ciel burst out, wondering why Sebastian was being so weird about this.

“Just promise me, Ciel.”

“Okay, I promise,” Ciel sighed, looking away as he rolled his eyes but Sebastian didn’t seem to notice.

“Why do you like him anyway? He’s rude and self-absorbed.”

“That’s exactly why I like him. He’s different,” Ciel admitted to his own surprise, but as the words flew out he knew that they were true. He did like the fact that Alois was the complete opposite of the people he usually had around him.

“Hmmm... Okay then. Do you want a cupcake? I had a craving last night and I baked way too many,” Sebastian suddenly asked, and had apparently let the issue go because he was now shooting a friendly smile at his younger brother.

Ciel let out a surprised laugh and accepted the offer.

When Sebastian returned with the pastries another idea popped into Ciel’s mind. He had not yet asked Sebastian what he should do to cheer Alois up (not that he would admit that it was him he was cheering up), but it seemed like he wouldn’t have to ask him after all.

He decided then and there that he would give Alois one of Sebastian’s cupcakes. After all, the blonde seemed to enjoy giving away sweets with notes on them, so he would surely enjoy receiving the same treatment himself?

###

Back in his dorm the next day, Ciel went through his drawers in search of the note that Alois had left him the first time he had given him one of his gifts. He mentally praised himself for not throwing it away; the only problem was that he couldn’t find the note with his dorm number anywhere.

_Where did I put that frickin note?_

He was planning to pull one of Alois’ own tricks and place the pastry outside his door. He had put the cupcake in a small cardboard box and taped a note to it, just as Alois had done two times before. That had to be enough to at least make him smile, right?

His phone chimed and turned his attention away from the drawers of his bedside table.

**Lizzy:**  
_Can I come by? :*_  
  
Ciel replied quickly, worried that she might already be on her way.

**Ciel:**  
_Sure, but I’m not at my dorm right now. Come by in an hour._

He just lied to his girlfriend. Smooth.

**Lizzy:**  
_Ok babe!_  
  
Ciel sighed and threw the phone on the bed. He rummaged through the drawers one last time before expanding his search. He went over to the desk and skimmed through the papers and books that were scattered all over the small area. He opened the small drawer under the keyboard and found the note lying on the bottom. _Phew._

He picked up the small box and walked out of the room. It took a while to find Alois’ dorm, Ciel weren’t that familiar with all the buildings yet. Eventually he found himself standing outside the wooden door with the numbers 212 painted on it.

For some reason he felt a little nervous, but he tried his best to ignore it. Ciel had trouble grasping the fact that he was actually doing this. He was actually doing a nice thing for a person who had been a pain in his ass for nearly two months. But he was sure that Alois needed something nice right now, even if he probably didn’t deserve it.

He placed the box on the floor in front of the door. The small note that was taped to it only said one simple word.

**Friends**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry, no Alois in this one. Ciel is changing though. Ever since he saw Alois get hurt he can’t seem to dislike him as much as before and he actually went as far as offering him his friendship. Even if he doesn’t know it or is willing to admit it, he kind of likes Alois and his rather wild personality, despite what has happened between them. He has been drawn to him ever since he saw him in that coffee shop and even though Alois has been aggravating him, Ciel can’t seem to dislike him as much as he might want to. I mean, Ciel is attracted to him and he does like that crazy side of Alois even though he annoys the hell out of him. And because of those things he finds himself doing something he never thought he would for a person he really wants to hate.
> 
> Just kind of a summary of what has happened so far/thoughts from me. Please tell me what you guys think! 
> 
> Next chapter: More cuteness
> 
> See you all next Thursday!


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again, thank you.

A couple of days had passed since he had left his peace offering outside of Alois’ dorm and he hadn’t heard a word from him since. He was starting to think that he might not have appreciated the gesture. Maybe he didn’t like the fact that Ciel had made an independent move in this little game of his. Ciel didn’t have time to ponder though; he was late for date night with Lizzy. They were going to the movies to watch some stupid romantic comedy.

Ciel pulled on an azure blue button-up and as he started buttoning it he heard the familiar _ping_ of someone sending him a message on Facebook. He didn’t really have time to check the message right now, but curiosity got the better of him.

**Alois Bootylicious Trancy:  
** _Ciel_

Not this again.

**Ciel Phantomhive:  
** _Alois_

**Alois Bootylicious Trancy:  
** _Can I call you?_

Ciel checked the time and a jolt of panic went through him when he realized that he was supposed to meet Lizzy outside the movie theatre in less than ten minutes. He grabbed his shoes and ran out and hurriedly locked the door.

He got there five minutes late but Lizzy didn’t seem to mind. They bought some sodas and popcorn and took their seats in the back of the half-filled movie theatre. Lizzy seemed to enjoy watching the trailers and Ciel took the opportunity to pull his phone out and reply back to Alois. His answer was half an hour late but it seemed as though Alois was still online.

**Ciel Phantomhive:  
**_I_ _can’t talk right now._

Alois responded immediately.

**Alois Bootylicious Trancy:  
** _Can I text you?_

Did Alois even have his number? Ciel chuckled softly to himself. Of course he did. Why he even bothered to ask for permission was beyond Ciel’s understanding but he figured he must have his own peculiar reasons.

**Ciel Phantomhive:  
** _No. I’m at the movies._

**Alois Bootylicious Trancy:  
** _You took so long to answer before that I thought you didn’t want to talk to me. So I left something at your dorm for you, but Finny took it. I hope he doesn’t eat it._

“Would you put that away already? The movie is about to start!” Lizzy nagged. Ciel typed a quick “good bye” before pocketing his phone.

“Sorry…” he muttered.

He couldn’t help but wonder what he had received this time. As annoying and weird as this whole leaving gifts-thing was, there was a part of him that felt excited by the fact that someone would go to such lengths to get his attention. He hoped that Alois had taken the hint that he had intended with the note he had left him. It would be really awkward if the blonde had written a love confession or something similar on this new gift, especially since Finny already had seen it.

He would stretch as far as being friends with the older boy, but he would never let him get anywhere close to kissing him again. No, he had a beautiful girlfriend that he cared a lot about, and he would never trade that for a crazy guy in booty shorts.

Ciel grabbed Lizzy’s hand, as if he was trying to convince himself that it was where he belonged. It was obvious that Alois was wishing for something more to come out of their relationship, but Ciel wasn’t interested. It might be true that he found him attractive but that was it. He had Lizzy and he needed nothing more.

He squeezed Lizzy’s hand and decided to concentrate on the movie but it was nearly impossible. He tried to suppress his feelings but no matter how he tried he couldn’t help the excitement he felt. He was curious and eager to see what Alois had given him. He could expect something edible, that much was certain, but the note… Ciel could barely admit it to himself, but the fact that he squirmed in his seat every five minutes and that he barely had any grasp on the movie made him realize that he was worked up to quite an extent. All he wanted was to get home and see what the note would say.

“What’s up with you today?” Lizzy whispered in an annoyed tone, glancing over in his direction.

“It’s nothing,” he mumbled back in a low voice, trying not to disturb the other viewers. He was a little embarrassed by the fact that his fidgeting had been that obvious and he let out a barely audible, exasperated sigh. He felt pathetic for letting Alois and his silly whims affect him the way they did. With a mental slap he sat up straight in his seat and leaned in so close to Lizzy that he nearly brushed the shell of her ear with his lips.

“It’s just that I can’t wait for us to get back to my dorm so I can hold you the way I want to,” he purred into her blonde locks, hoping his words would be enough to satisfy her. When she proceeded to giggle softly against her petite fingers in response he knew he had succeeded in his task. A triumphant little smile crept onto his lips but it quickly vanished when he realized exactly what it was that he had just said. Again, he had to scold himself for his own carelessness. Now he had to wait even longer to read that damn note.

###

“What is that?” Lizzy bawled, pointing at the pink box on Ciel’s bed.

“It’s just a gift… from Sebastian,” Finny lied with a dumb smile. It was obvious to everyone that he wasn’t telling the truth. Finny hadn’t expected Lizzy to come back with Ciel, and had done nothing to hide neither the box nor the note attached to it. Ciel could of course have thought to text him and tell him about the new plans, but his brain wasn’t functioning normally at the moment, as it usually never did whenever Alois invaded it.

All Ciel could do after the obvious lie had left his friends lips, was to gape at him with wide eyes. He couldn’t believe that he had lied to Lizzy for him, even though the lie was a really bad one. In some odd way, he was grateful; it was nice to know that Finny had his back.

“Sebastian would never give Pocky sticks to Ciel. I know you’re lying to me, Finny,” she stated in a calmer tone, though her frowning face and blazing eyes made it very clear that she was still highly upset.

Ciel was starting to get strangely annoyed and squirmed on the edge of his bed. “It’s just candy, you don’t have to read into it,” he muttered from behind her. “Calm down.”

She turned to face him and looked completely insane for a moment before she took a deep breath and opened her mouth to speak. “Ciel, it’s kissing candy with a note that says ‘Thank you’ with a little pink heart drawn on it. Do you two honestly expect me to believe that Sebastian gave this to Ciel?”

“I’m not cheating on you, if that’s what you think,” Ciel snapped and grabbed the sides of the bed. “And it’s still just candy. It doesn’t have to have anything to do with kissing.” He knew that what he was saying made perfect sense. Still, as the words flew past his lips, he couldn’t help but wonder if Alois had intended it to indicate something like that.

“Well, what do expect me to think?”

“It was Alois who gave me this, okay? I didn’t want to tell you because I didn’t want you to get the wrong idea,” he explained. “We helped him out with something.”

“That freak?” she seethed with a disgusted look. “Wow, Ciel. I didn’t think you’d want to hang out with someone like that.”

“What do you mean by that, Lizzy? He’s a nice guy!” Finny argued, seemingly offended on Alois’ behalf. He muttered something to himself before he went over to Ciel, snatched the box from the bed and opened it before returning to his previous spot on his own bed. He pulled out one of the pink, strawberry-flavored sticks and looked it over between his fingers. “And he gives us candy,” he chuckled before putting the stick in his mouth with a smile.

She rolled her eyes and spat, “He took his clothes off, shoved his crotch in Ciel’s face and embarrassed him in front of at least 20 people!”

Both Ciel and Finny fell silent. They had to admit she had a point, but for some reason Ciel felt himself getting more and more irritated with every word she spewed out, and he was starting to get really fed-up with Lizzy’s childish outburst over such a trivial matter.

“I will be friends with whoever I want. You have no say in who I choose to spend time with,” Ciel stated in a firm tone.

Lizzy clenched her fists and took a deep breath, letting the seconds pass as she considered his words. Finally she sighed, “Fine. I can’t control you, Ciel. But please, you have to admit that this is weird. Does he have a crush on you or something?” Ciel gasped and flew up from the bed. “NO! That’s absurd!”

Lizzy snorted and went to sit down next to Finny. “Seems like it to me,” she muttered.

“Alois is a special guy, you can’t expect him to act like normal people,” Finny laughed, holding up the box. “Anyone want one?”

###

Ciel stared up at the ceiling. Finny’s faint snoring was the only sound coming from within the walls of their small dorm room.

Lizzy had gone back to her own dorm a couple of hours ago. She had dropped the whole Alois-thing after Finny had started throwing Pockys at her. Ciel had found it hilarious but Lizzy had seemed anything but amused. He was silently hoping that she would forget about the whole thing. It wasn’t like Alois was a threat to her.

At the time he had thought that she was overreacting, but when he had started to think about it he had realized that she had to be frustrated. They had less time to spend together nowadays, due to classes and their never ending piles of homework, and the fact that Ciel hadn’t come any closer in figuring out his own feelings towards her couldn’t be easy for her to deal with.

And now, someone sent her boyfriend sweets that many associated with kissing, accompanied by a note with a heart on it. A lump of guilt formed in the pit of his stomach and he swallowed and turned around on the bed to face the wall. Could she really feel threatened by Alois?

His icy blue eyes flashed through Ciel’s mind and made his lips involuntarily curb slightly upwards. Even though the gift had caused such drama, he got a pleasant feeling in his stomach when he thought of the note. In his own odd way, Alois wanted to show his appreciation for them helping him out, and Ciel found it strangely endearing.

He rolled around on the bed until he was facing the room. He grabbed his phone and started typing on the Facebook-chat.

**Ciel Phantomhive:  
** _Thank you_

Ciel waited for several minutes but there was no answer, so he tried again.

**Ciel Phantomhive:  
** _What’s up? I can’t sleep_

He grabbed one of the last Pockys from the bedside table and put the stick in his mouth. He started playing some mindless game in an attempt to tire himself out. After about twenty minutes he felt his eyes starting to get heavy and just as he was about to put his phone away an unknown number flashed on the screen. Someone was calling him in the middle of the night and he had a clue as to who it might be.

“Hello?” he answered in a tired voice.

“Ciel?”

“Alois, is that you?”

“Maybe.” He could hear him smirk on the other end.

He heard Finny shuffle in his bed and lowered his voice.

“I thought I told you not to call me tonight.”

“I forgot.”

“Very funny. What’s up?”

“Nothing much, just trying to pass the time.”

“How’s your cheek?”

“Still bright purple, but at least it’s not sore anymore,” he said with a small chuckle. “Thank you for taking pity on me.”

“Hey, don’t say it like I didn’t want to.”

“Did you?” he asked in a small voice.

“Of course I wanted to help you, stupid,” Ciel teased. “How cruel do you think I am?”

Alois laughed softly on the other end.

_Cute._

Ciel’s eyes went wide with the realization. Had he just thought that Alois had made a cute noise? He must be losing his mind. He shook the thought away and went back to the conversation.

“Are you ready to talk about it?” Ciel asked with caution.

There was only silence on the other end for a few moments before Alois answered. “I… I don’t know. Maybe,” he mumbled.

“Can you tell me about Claude?” Ciel asked in a calm tone.

“He’s my ex,” Alois snorted in a slightly harsh tone. It was obvious that he harbored a lot of anger for the older boy and Ciel didn’t blame him. He had punched him in the face after all.

Ciel pondered for a few moments before continuing. He was careful to choose the right words, hoping he wouldn’t upset Alois too much. He wanted him to get it out of his system, but he didn’t want him to feel bad about it. It was supposed to make him feel better.

“When did you two break up?” Ciel finally asked.

“Almost four months ago. I broke it off, I was sick of his fucking mood swings,” Alois answered in a surprisingly calm tone. Ciel had obviously asked the right question.

“But I saw you two… you know. At the party,” he mindlessly blurted out.

There was another moment of silence before Alois snapped at him. “Yeah, so what? Can’t a guy get lonely?”

That was apparently not the words that Alois wanted to hear. “Uhm… Sure.. I mean, of course. I get it,” Ciel mumbled, hoping he had said the right words this time. “Have you talked to him after… you know?” Ciel asked.

“No, and I don’t want to. Can we please talk about something else?” Alois pleaded.

“Sure, what do you want to talk about?”

“You.”

“Me? Umm… Sure. What do you want to know?”

“Tell me what you like to do for fun.”

“Fun…” Ciel repeated and paused for a moment, trying to gather his thoughts. “I like games,” he finally concluded.

“What kind of games?”

“I like playing chess.”

“You’re such a nerd,” Alois teased and let out a faint chuckle.

Ciel narrowed his eyes and quickly retorted in a taunting tone laced with a hint of humor. “I’d rather be a nerd than a shameless, lunatic stripper.”

Alois started laughing uncontrollably in Ciel’s ear until he finally had to stop and gasp for air. Ciel’s lips curved up into a smile, satisfied that he had been right about how Alois would handle the insult.

“That’s the best description of me that I’ve received so far,” he whimpered between breaths.

“I’m glad you approve,” Ciel choked out, barely able to keep himself from laughing as well.

Alois let out a couple amused sighs before he finally calmed down and murmured, “Hey, Ciel.”

“Yes?”

“I really like talking to you.”

“Oh, really?” Well, I don’t hate talking to you. That’s all you get,” Ciel teased.

“You’re evil.”

“And you like it.”

Alois snickered on the other end and calmly stated, “Yes, I believe you’re right about that.”

Their conversation went on covering unimportant details about their lives, all kinds of favorites and a lot of do’s and don’ts. They managed to go on for almost two hours before Ciel finally fell asleep with the phone still pressed against his ear.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> These last chapters have been very focused on Ciel and his thoughts and feelings. That all ends now. In the next chapter we will finally see Alois being Alois yet again, and it will be fun *smirks*
> 
> I might even post it early, who knows? Maybe if you’re nice and comment a lot I will find it in me to be generous~


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Because I’m the world’s most impatient person and I really adored your comments last week I think an early update is in order.
> 
> Enjoy!

After their first phone call they talked to each other almost every night for an entire week. They spoke about almost everything between heaven and earth and at times it felt like they could talk forever. Ciel couldn’t believe how easy it was to have a conversation with Alois over the phone. He showed a completely different side of himself. The flamboyant and expressive teen was shoved aside to make room for a part of him that was down to earth and compassionate. It baffled Ciel, who never could have imagined him being able to be this… _normal_.

Ciel had a hard time grasping the fact that he could spend such a great amount of time simply _talking_. He wondered if Alois was changing him somehow, or maybe he just had an ability to tap into parts of him that were hidden, even to himself. He found it odd, but somehow slightly titillating, how one single person could affect him in such a way.

Not that Ciel complained; he was actually happy about having gotten so close to Alois. There was so much to this boy, so much hidden under the surface. He was like a hundred-layered cake and for each bite there was a new sensation of flavors. It had quickly become Ciel’s favorite game, trying to gather as many pieces as he could of the puzzle that was Alois Trancy.

Alois was full of surprises; for instance, he confided in Ciel that one of his biggest dreams was to own a tarantula. Ciel had let him babble on about the pet of his dreams for much longer than he cared to admit, but the truth was that he reveled in the excitement in Alois’ voice when he spoke of the future.

He spoke of traveling, his future apartment and even what he would wear when he was an old man. One of the reasons why Ciel found such satisfaction in listening to Alois going on about his dreams, was that he never seemed more happy and more broken when he did so. There was a mix of emotions there that awoken Ciel’s curiosity along with a distinct stab of anxiety. There were a lot of mysteries to this boy and Ciel was certain that many of them weren’t very pleasant.

Ciel confided in him too. He even told him about his parents and the accident that stole them away from him. Sometimes he even found himself talking about his feelings; he had even talked about Lizzy. Once, Alois had asked him if he loved her. Ciel had lost all of his words in that moment, giving Alois nothing more than quiet breaths as an answer.

After that, Alois hadn’t brought it up again, and for that Ciel was grateful. By now he was pretty sure he would never figure out how he felt. Every time he dared to reflect on the subject his mind went completely blank. It made him feel like an emotionless prick.

Unfortunately, Alois was not without emotion. In fact, he was full of them.

“I really like you,” the blonde confessed on the other end, as if Ciel wasn’t already extremely aware of that little fact.

Ciel felt a weird fluttering sensation in the pit of his stomach and a blush rose to his face. At first he was confused by his own reaction but he quickly waved it of as embarrassment. How was he supposed to be friends with Alois if he insisted on bringing this up? He thought that he had made it abundantly clear that he only wanted to be friends.

“I know…” Ciel murmured, scratching his head in a way to occupy his free hand.

“I know you like me too.”

“I do like you Alois, but not in that way,” Ciel stated, somewhat frustrated.

“Why are you denying it?” he asked with such confidence that it elicited an irritated groan from Ciel.

“I’m not,” he sighed. “Just let it go, Alois.”

Ciel heard him snort on the other end and then Alois swiftly changed the subject and continued the conversation in a slightly indifferent tone.

“There’s a party tomorrow at Hannah’s parents’ house. They’re out of town. You wanna go?”

Even though he wasn’t up for partying with Alois again he was grateful for the change of subject and hesitantly agreed. “Sure… But only if Finny can come with me.” If he was going to another party with Alois, he could use all the moral support he could get.

“The more, the merrier,” Alois murmured, sounding slightly off.

“Will Claude be there?” Ciel asked carefully in a small voice.

“No,” Alois answered in a harsh tone. “Hannah made sure of that.”

###

The short bus ride to Hannah’s house was filled with excitement, at least if you asked Finny. They had been to a few other parties after the one at Alois’ house but Finny hadn’t acted like this then. Finally, Ciel had to ask why he was so enthusiastic. The answer he got was that he apparently was hoping for Alois to do something daring again.

The picture of Alois in his silk panties popped into Ciel’s mind and made him cringe. Surely, he wasn’t planning on doing something like _that_ again? He had gotten so used to the calmer, nicer version of Alois that he had almost forgotten what he usually considered a good time.

And that would usually include someone else’s torture and humiliation.

The bus pulled over and Finny bolted out the door, followed by Ciel. They walked the short distance to the house painted in a Dartmouth green that Alois had described to him. He had promised that he would be inside, waiting for them, so that they didn’t have to sit in a house full of strangers all by themselves.

“You sure have been talking to Alois a lot lately. You’re not replacing me as your best friend, are you?” Finny asked in a tone that was playfully teasing but at the same time had a slight hint of actual concern.

Ciel raised an eyebrow and let out a surprised chuckle. He grabbed Finny’s shoulders and looked him in the eyes with the most serious expression he could manage. “No one could replace you, you idiot.” Ciel smiled and put an arm around his friend’s shoulders and together they strolled over to Hannah’s house.

She met them at the door with a wide smile. Ciel raised his eyebrows at the sight of her smiling and he realized that it was the first time he had ever seen her do so.

She was wearing a white dress with light blue details that clung in a very flattering way to her generous curves. Ciel could barely contain his laughter when he noticed the scarlet tinting his friend’s cheeks and the way he seemed to be looking everywhere but at Hannah and her voluptuous form.

They were shown into a spacy living room where a small group of people were gathered. She assured them that more people would arrive soon but Ciel didn’t really listen as he was completely taken off guard by Alois’ outfit.

His torso was partially covered by the loose white tank top he wore. It ended right above his crotch, hanging loosely over his lean yet appealingly defined shoulders. His calves were covered by knee-high white stockings and on his feet he had on a pair of ordinary black sneakers.

At first sight, Ciel had almost thought that he might have forgotten his pants at home (which actually wouldn’t have surprised Ciel at all), but when he got closer he became shockingly aware of the part of Alois’ outfit that stood out the most. The small amount of pink fabric covering his privates was so revealing that it made Ciel blush.

Alois face lit up at the sight of them and he flew up from the plush cushions and strolled over to greet them. Finny didn’t seem bothered in the least by the small shorts he wore, if you could even call them shorts. They looked more like underwear.

It was bitterly cold outside, how could he not freeze to death wearing that?

He embraced Finny who grinned in delight and it was obvious that he had been hoping for something like this. After releasing Finny, Alois turned to Ciel with the widest smile he had even seen on the older boy and before he could react the blonde’s arms found their way around his neck in a tight, warm hug. Ciel couldn’t deny that he was happy to see him too, and put his hands on Alois’ back, holding him tightly. He inhaled the pleasant scent of daisies coming from the older boy and the sweet fragrance made his mind go hazy for a second.

After a moment that lasted a little longer than necessary, Alois finally loosened his grip on him and pulled back to look him in the eyes. Ciel’s deep purple and royal blue met summer sky and for a few seconds they just stood there. Alois eventually gave him a wide grin before turning his head to face Hannah, while snapping his fingers at her.

“Hannah! Beers!” he commanded like it was the most normal thing in the world to boss her around, which to him it probably was.

He signaled for them to sit down on the beige couch after he had pushed some poor girl away from the chosen piece of furniture. The girl went to sit down on one of the chairs that were placed around the small coffee table instead. Ciel looked at Finny with a frown before sitting down, but the strawberry-blonde boy only smiled happily, as if Alois’ behavior didn’t bother him at all.

Hannah came back to the room with two bottles in each hand and proceeded to hand them out.

“I don’t know if I should-“ Ciel started but Alois seemed to have a different opinion.

“Shush! Of course you’re drinking! Take it, take it, take it!”

Ciel growled in annoyance but he knew better than to argue with Alois when he was in this mood. “Okay, but just one.”

###

A couple of hours passed by and by now the small house was filled with people. Their small group hadn’t moved from their place on the couch except for the occasional visit to the bathroom. Alois had placed a second beer in front of him at some point, but Ciel hadn’t touched it.

Most of the young students were having a good time but no one could avoid noticing that Alois was getting bored the way he was squirming and whining at the end of the couch.

“I want to dooo something! Hannah what should we dooo?”

“Ehm… I don’t know,” she mumbled in response.

“Drinking game?” Finny suggested next to Ciel.

_Did you really just say that, Finny?_ Ciel gaped at his friend in surprise but he didn’t argue against his suggested pastime. He knew that it was no use; Alois would surely like his suggestion and he always seemed to get his will one way or another.

He was right, of course.

“Never have I ever!” Alois practically yelled in excitement. His hands flew up and he clapped them together in delight. He didn’t wait for anyone to agree (or disagree) as he grabbed his fourth bottle of beer and turned to face Ciel. “Never have I ever fantasized about someone else while having sex,” he said in a tantalizing voice with a glint in his big eyes.

“Aren’t you supposed to say things you haven’t done? There is no way in hell you haven’t done that,” a tall girl with long blonde hair asked, while shooting Alois a look that was mostly taunting. Alois only gave her a smirk in response and turned to look at Ciel and Finny with eyes glittering with excitement.

“Well?” he asked with raised eyebrows.

Ciel swallowed hard and looked around at the rest of the crowd gathered around them. About half of them raised their drinks and small giggles filled the room. He tried to think back on the few times he actually had had sex. Even if he and Lizzy had been together for over a year they had only actually had full on sex a handful of times. Not recalling such an incident during any of those times, he decided not to drink and found that Finny didn’t drink either.

Alois looked somewhat disappointed but his voice was eager. “Your turn, Ciel!”

“Oh… Uhm.” He looked around for some support but they all looked at him in anticipation. Ciel did like games, but ones of this sort were definitely not his cup of tea. He found it quite childish to be honest. Swallowing his pride, he decided to play along; it was not like he had anywhere to run. “Never have I ever… had sex outside,” he blurted out while feeling his face heat up in an unavoidable blush.

Alois giggled and took a sip, as did Finny and Ciel’s eyes went wide in an instant. He never knew his friend was so… adventurous.

“Never have I ever had a threesome!” Finny called out with a grin while bouncing on the couch.

Maybe Alois had an effect on Finny too, because Ciel had never seen his usually sweet and naive friend act like this.

This time there were only two people who raised their drinks and Ciel wasn’t surprised by the fact that Alois was one of them. The girl on the chair beside Finny opened her mouth slowly. Her cheeks were slightly flushed and her hands were fidgeting nervously in her lap.

“Never have I ever kissed someone of the same sex,” she mumbled, but then a small smirk formed on her lips and she looked over at her friend who grabbed her drink and took a sip while shooting her a vicious glare. A few boys whistled as some of the other girls grabbed their drinks as well. To no one’s surprise Alois put his bottle of beer against his lips and poured a great amount of the liquid down his throat.

“Many times, sweetie. Aren’t you going to drink, Ciel?” he commented with a teasing grin.

Ciel’s eyes went wide with the memory and his face turned crimson in a matter of seconds. Without a word he slowly raised his bottle and took a very small sip and lowered it quickly. Finny burst out in laughter and Ciel shot him a murderous glare.

A scrawny boy with short brown hair continued the game with much excitement.

“Never have I ever been so drunk that I woke up in my own vomit!” he chuckled before he looked over at the older boy sitting beside him with a teasing smirk. The boy grinned in response and gulped down the remainder of his drink.

The room filled with laughter and even though Ciel didn’t quite fancy playing this game, he did enjoy seeing his friends having such a good time.

The game continued on for quite a while, and most of the questions were unfortunately not as vulgar and outrageous as some of the first ones, which meant that both Ciel and Finny, along with most of the people participating, had to drink. The results were, of course, that most of them had gotten pretty tipsy at this point.

Ciel heard excited voices getting louder, coming from somewhere in the house. He was very comfortable where he sat and didn’t bother to find out what the fuss was about. Instead, he leaned back against the couch and relaxed, lost in thought, when he suddenly realized that everyone had left the room.

Everyone but him and Alois.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed this chapter. The next one will be even better. I'll post it on Thursday as usual.
> 
> Comment and share your thoughts. Make me happy! I updated early after all~


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Dancing around like an idiot* I’m so blessed to have such amazing readers. Keep being so utterly wonderful!
> 
> It's Thursday in... Romania. So I'm just gonna post this now.
> 
> I hope you appreciated the early update last week. I’m betting you’re all wondering what Alois and Ciel will be doing while they're all alone in that couch. Well, now you finally get to find out!
> 
> I really think y’all will like this chapter. It’s one of my favorites. Enjoy!

Ciel smiled contentedly in his seat and leaned back against the cushions. His mind was blissfully clouded and his body was wonderfully relaxed. Finny had joined the former game participants in the kitchen, where something very exciting was going on, judging by the sounds coming from within the room. Ciel, however, was satisfied with his current position, and happily allowed his thoughts to drift wherever they chose to.

Alois had been set on getting him drunk and had certainly succeeded in his task and Ciel couldn’t deny the fact that he had let him. There was something about the blonde that made him question everything he had ever been taught, and everything he thought he knew about himself. At times he felt uneasy about how the older boy was influencing him, but at the moment all he could feel was exhilaration. With Alois, he could explore himself without any fear of being judged. Despite the blonde’s endless teasing and bothersome traits, he felt like he could be himself around him, and it was _liberating_.

Ciel knew that he had let himself get to this point by his own will, despite the fact that the older boy had spurred him on. He might have had just a tiny bit too much to drink, but he couldn’t find it in him to be bothered at that moment. All of his troubles seemed to have vanished with the last three questions of the game.

Normally he might have objected when Alois chose to use his lap as a pillow, but that didn’t really matter right now. He barely heard what the blonde was babbling about while he stared up at him with those big blue eyes. All he saw were those sparkling blue orbs and they were piercing him, trapping him.

He didn’t realize that Alois’ hand was trailing up his chest to find a place in his greyish-blue and slightly disheveled head of hair until soft fingers lightly began rubbing his sensitive scalp with gentle circling motions. Ciel let out a barely audible, breathy moan, and had he been sober, he might have been embarrassed but in his current state, he could only focus on how nice Alois’ fingers felt on him.

Still entrapped in that summer sky, he saw a glimmer of something that resembled bliss. It was a beautiful sight, watching the fiery blonde gaze up at him in utter contentment. Ciel found himself wishing that he could somehow force those enchanting eyes to stay that way forever, but at the same time he had to wonder why he had never seen that glimmer before.

While slowly losing himself in the soothing motions of those skilled fingers his body seemed to move on its own accord. Ciel barely noticed how his own hand rose from its place on the couch and fell down again on top of Alois’ head. The blonde strands fell between his fingers and tickled his skin as he gently began petting the older boy; still not bothered by his own unusual behavior.

They sat like that for a while until the loud noises coming from the kitchen started to fade and a few of those who had been gathered inside started pouring out of the doorway to return to the living room. Alois sat up quickly and returned to his place beside Ciel in a sitting position, removing any evidence of their previous activities.

Ciel whined quietly at the loss of contact but he quickly composed himself when he saw Finny walking towards them. It finally dawned on him what he had just been doing with Alois and for the hundredth time that evening, he felt that familiar heat starting to spread across his cheeks. Finny sat down beside Ciel with a wide smile and began telling them about what had been going on in the kitchen, but Ciel could barely register what his friend was saying. He had literally just stroked Alois Trancy's hair while the other rested his head on his lap and did the same to him, and he was searching his mind fiercely for one small part of him that hadn’t enjoyed it.

“I’m cold,” Alois suddenly blurted out before pulling the red blanket on the headrest down and draping it across his lap. When Ciel glanced down, he found that the blanket was covering one of his own legs and just as he was about to remove it he felt lean fingers wrap around the hand that was resting on his thigh. Electricity shot up through his arm but he didn’t pull away; he knew that he should have but he was impossibly stuck, paralyzed by the thrumming sound of his own rapid heartbeat.

Alois intertwined their fingers and Ciel was beginning to truly believe that he was losing his mind, because he _liked_ it; having Alois’ fingers wrapped around his own actually felt _nice_ , and he realized that he wanted them there. A careful thumb started moving over the side of his hand, causing him to shiver in contentment. As he let out an involuntary sigh, Alois looked up at him with both surprise and mischief covering his features.

Finny, who had been mindlessly babbling beside them looked thoroughly dazed when Alois shot up from the couch, releasing Ciel’s hand in the process. Ciel gazed up at him with a muddled look, not registering the small tug on his sleeve as Alois leaned over him with an ardent fire burning in his eyes. With more force, he tugged again and returned Ciel's gaze with a small smirk.

“Come on, I need to talk to you.”

Hesitantly, Ciel rose to his feet and raised his eyebrows in confusion, as he waited for the older boy to explain why he suddenly needed to speak to him. Instead of an explanation, Alois took his hand and dragged him into a small, dark room. His mind was still in a drunken haze and he didn’t realize they were standing in the bathroom until Alois locked the door.

“Alois… what-“

Ciel didn’t get to finish his question as he was roughly pushed up against the wall. Wet lips were suddenly pressed against his and Ciel was once again paralyzed, unable to command his limbs to move. As Alois’ hands roamed he felt his skin starting to tingle and every touch left his skin burning. He felt so extremely confused yet somehow he felt like he knew everything; he felt mind-numbingly nervous yet somehow he felt like the king of the world.

Alois’ lips kept moving against his with fierce passion, and the blonde pressed himself flush against Ciel’s smaller frame. He had no idea what to do or how he should react; he could barely even form a coherent thought. When the tip of Alois’ tongue started playing with his bottom lip his heart nearly skipped a beat and his hands began to slightly tremble.

His eyelids slowly fell down until his eyes were completely shut. The sensations of the kiss crashed through him like lightning and he found himself panting against those alluring pink lips, barely able to register what was happening anymore. His own mouth began responding to the kiss and he parted his lips slowly, allowing Alois to slide his tongue inside. The small moans coming from the blonde were doing things to him; things he could barely admit to himself.

Ciel finally decided to ignore his distracting thoughts and completely lost himself in the kiss. Alois’ hands tangled themselves in his hair and their tongues were moving together with intense fervor when Alois finally pulled back to allow them both to catch their breaths. They gazed into each other’s eyes for a few moments, both panting heavily, until Alois leaned in once more, head lower this time.

The blonde began placing small kisses on Ciel’s neck and the sensation caused a shiver to run down his spine. He felt the soft, wet tip of a tongue trace over the pulsing vein as a small breathy moan left Alois’ lips. The breaths ghosting over his sensitive skin had his entire body shuddering with lust.

Then, as if someone had hit him in the head with a rock, awareness of exactly what he was doing struck him. Even with desire practically radiating off his body, his conscience kept reminding him of what he was doing, and what it meant. He told himself over and over that he shouldn’t want this; that he shouldn’t want the blonde boy currently worshipping him with a soft mouth and eager hands.

With a drunken splutter Ciel whimpered, “I… ah… I don’t want… you can’t…”

Alois chuckled softly against his neck before tilting his head slightly to whisper in his ear. “You don’t want me?” He let a puff of hot air follow his words. “Then I have to wonder why your body is so keen on telling me that you do.”

Ciel gasped in surprise when Alois suddenly pressed his hand against the hard bulge between his legs and squeezed down gently. A satisfied little laugh left the blonde’s lips and he began rubbing him through the fabric in gentle circles, causing Ciel’s breath to come out hitched.

“I don’t… ahh!” he whimpered but Alois ignored him completely and bit down on the junction between his neck and his shoulder. Ciel gulped and let out a small, sharp noise when the sensations of pleasure-pain had him trembling against his will. He wanted to resist his urges, but as Alois kept working his hand over his stiffening length it became very apparent that his brain had no say in this. His hands started moving on their own and found their way into Alois’ hair and grabbed on tight. Ciel squeezed his eyes shut and let out a weak moan when Alois traced his tongue along his collarbone.

Alois suddenly fell down into a kneeling position but Ciel barely noticed in the haze of emotions that were clouding his mind. He didn’t open his eyes until he felt hands on his belt, fumbling fingers clawing at the buttons of his pants, and he stared down in confusion.

It wasn’t until his pants were pulled down and resting in a pile around his feet that he realized what Alois was about to do. He was just about to open his mouth to say something, yet he wasn’t sure what, when his underwear was swiftly pulled down, releasing his hardened member from its cramped prison.

Alois looked up with a wide grin, seemingly pleased with his findings, and Ciel could only look with amazement as Alois wrapped his fingers around his length and gave it a few slow strokes. The blonde darted his tongue out as he gazed up at Ciel with eyes clouded with arousal, causing the younger boy’s breath to get caught in his throat as the he dipped it into the slit of the swollen tip, lapping up the few drops of liquid that had gathered there.

Ciel closed his eyes and let his head fall back against the cold tiles, losing himself in the pleasurable sensations that coursed through his body as Alois traced that wicked tongue up and down in slow, teasing lines along his hard shaft. He flicked the soft, slippery muscle over the head once more before letting it slide past his lips with a light sucking motion.

Ciel’s mouth fell open and he moaned loudly at the sudden pleasure and felt his cheeks heat up in shame, but it was soon forgotten when the blonde began working his tongue on him with more intensity. He slowly opened his eyes to gaze down at the older boy, who was lapping at his achingly hard member like it was a piece of delicious candy, and became extremely aware of the irrevocable fact that yes, he very much wanted this.

He squeezed his eyes shut and let out a throaty groan when Alois swallowed nearly his entire length in one swift movement. He tightened his grip in Alois' hair and had to use all of his self-restraint not to thrust into that deliciously hot mouth.

Alois grabbed the base of his shaft and started bobbing his head at a tantalizingly slow pace. Alois drew shameful whines out of Ciel's mouth with his teasingly slow ministrations, but the usually stoic boy hardly cared about the sounds he was making anymore. When Alois began sucking more fiercely he practically wailed, and it didn’t take long before he felt that familiar heat starting to build up in the pit of his stomach. His breaths came out in uneven pants and his grip in Alois’ hair tightened so much that it had to be painful.

 “I’m… aahh... I’m gonna-“

Alois pulled away from Ciel’s cock with a wet pop, staring up at the younger boy with a malicious smirk. “We should go back to the party, the others are probably wondering where we are.”

Ciel looked down with glossy eyes and flushed cheeks, barely registering what the blonde was saying. Alois had just started to rise up to his feet when it dawned on him that the blonde had no intention of finishing what he had started and he began babbling desperately, abandoning every ounce of pride he had left.

“W-what are y-you... You can’t ju-“

The blonde grinned wickedly and leaned forward, so close that their noses were almost touching.

 “I can’t what, Ciel? I thought you said you didn’t want me.”

“I… I-“

“Admit to me that you want me, Ciel. Admit it and beg me to continue,” Alois whispered in a sultry tone right next to his ear.

Ciel’s eyes went wide with shock and frustration and his body was practically trembling with arousal and anger when he growled, “I won’t beg.”

Alois got down to his previous position and wrapped his fingers around the base of Ciel’s painfully stiff member. He darted his pink tongue out and flicked it teasingly over the tip, eliciting a needy whine from the younger boy.

“Admit it…” Alois whispered.

“No…” Ciel breathed, barely able to keep himself from breaking.

“You want me. Say it.”

Alois dragged his tongue alluringly slow over the tight skin of his shaft and the sensation almost made his knees give out. His composure fell apart completely as he whimpered into the dark, “I... aahh… yes…”

“Yes, what?”

“I want you, Alois... I want you… nnn… _please_.”

With a smug smile he lowered his mouth onto Ciel’s cock again, sucking and licking against the sensitive skin, causing the younger boy to cry out in pleasure. With his pride completely torn and a burning need for release controlling him, he clutched fistfuls of the blonde’s hair desperately. He began wantonly thrusting into Alois’ wet, sweltering mouth and Alois moaned his approval around his member, causing even more pleasure to course through him. Alois kept making lewd noises and closed his eyes as he moved his hands to dig his fingernails into the younger boy’s supple cheeks, dragging them over the sensitive skin.

It was all too much; his moaning, his clawing, his _tongue_. Ciel thrust in one last time before he felt himself fall over the edge.

“Oh God… Alo—Alois!” he wailed as he came into Alois’ mouth, waves of intense pleasure crashing through him. His head fell back as he rode out his orgasm and Alois swallowed around Ciel's length as his mouth was filled with hot, thick liquid.

Alois pulled away gently, letting his tongue drag along the underside of Ciel's cock as he did so and got up to his feet. He wiped the side of his mouth with his hand and Ciel met his gaze for a brief moment before the blonde embraced him, burying his face in the crook of his neck.

“I knew it…” he whispered with a smug smile. Exhausted, Ciel completely surrendered in the other’s arms and moved his hands to rest on his back. They stood there, holding on to each other for what seemed like an eternity…

…Right up until someone banged on the door.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [insert molester moon emoji here]


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Your comments on the last chapter.. Wow. I adore all of you for being so wonderful. You have no idea how happy you make me!
> 
> Some very amazing readers have sent me drawings/doodles of scenes from the fic, so I created a user on PB so that I could share them with everyone. Link:
> 
> http://s172.photobucket.com/user/Saddith/library/Mobile%20Uploads?sort=3&page=1
> 
> I really LOVE getting these so if you want to send me something you can do so on either Instagram (touch.me.trancy) where I’m most active or on Tumblr (touch-me-trancy).

”Others need to use the bathroom! What’s going on in there?”

Ciel quickly pulled his pants back up and checked himself over in the mirror. He hurriedly patted his tousled hair, trying to destroy any evidence of lewd activity while Alois went to unlock the door. He opened it just slightly at first, peeking his head out to see who had felt the urge to disturb them.

“Who’s out there?” Ciel whispered behind Alois’ back.

Alois turned his head with a sympathetic look before pushing the door completely open. Finny and three other boys stood outside with curious looks on their faces. When Ciel came into view one of the boys started whistling and the others soon followed; all except Finny, who had a face that showed both absolute consternation and soul crushing, heartbreaking disappointment.

“Why… were you in there?” He paused and swallowed, examining their flushed faces and swollen lips with a look that told them that they didn’t have to answer - he already knew. “Lizzy…” he continued and Ciel could hear the lump in his throat. “How could you do this to Lizzy?”

“Finny, calm down,” Ciel began, walking in a fast pace towards his friend. “It was just a kiss. It didn’t mean anything, I swear!”

Finny’s cheeks had a deep scarlet tint due to the abundance of emotions coursing through his body, all caused by Ciel. And now he had altered the truth and lied to his best friend once more.

He felt something brush against his back and when he glanced over his shoulder he saw Alois walk away. He couldn’t see his face, but with a simply glance at his back it was obvious that he wasn’t thrilled. Of course he wasn’t; Ciel had just said that what they did didn’t mean anything. Another lie. It _did_ mean _something_ , but he couldn’t let Finny know about that. Alois would have to understand that.

“Alois!” he called out but the older boy just kept walking until he reached the kitchen.

Finny grabbed Ciel’s arm and directed his attention to him. His friend’s eyes were cloudy due to the alcohol in his system and filled with emotions that Ciel couldn’t place. He mentally prepared himself for the lecture that was sure to come, but when Finny opened his mouth and spoke he had to shake his head to make sense of what he had just heard.

“I think you really hurt his feelings, Ciel. Did you really mean what you said - that the kiss didn’t mean anything?”

For a few short moments Ciel simply stood there, completely dumbfound, but he knew he had to come up with a good answer, even though speaking about this was the last thing he wanted to do right now.

“Y-yes… I meant it,” he continued lying in a small voice, slowly lowering his gaze to the floor. “I want to leave.”

“Okay… But Ciel… Just listen to me for a second.” He paused and furrowed his brow, causing him to look disquietingly astringent. “You _have_ to figure this out. I’m here if you want to talk, just don’t bottle stuff up. Are you listening to me, Ciel?”

Ciel’s gaze had drifted off as the realization of just what this entire situation meant came crashing down on him. His best friend -who knew him better than anyone- was sensing that something was up and Ciel was sure he couldn’t hide the truth forever.

If only he knew the truth.

Doing what he did with Alois only made him that much more confused about everything, and it made him doubt every single detail of his life. He had enjoyed what they did, Alois had made him more excited that evening than any person had made him in his entire life and it was all wondrously _thrilling_ in a way… Still, it all made Ciel extremely uneasy and as he pondered he felt a lump form in the pit of his stomach.

_I’m not straight?_

In all honesty, the thought of him being attracted to anything other than girls had never even crossed his mind before; not until Alois walked into his life. He had done everything in his power to ignore how he felt whenever he was close to the blonde, but all of that had changed now; it was impossible to deny it any longer.

He had dreamt about the older boy multiple times; he always experienced something truly odd stir inside of him whenever he saw the blonde’s name flash across the screen of his phone; Alois had even been stroking his hair earlier that evening and he had _enjoyed_ it. Alois’ hands and fingers and mouth had touched him in several ways and on several occasions…

…and he wanted the blonde to do it again.

His whole life flashed through his mind in a pointless effort to find any signs, any indications that he had ever found any other male desirable in that way.

He had only had one girlfriend, and Lizzy was the only girl he had ever found any interest in. Ciel wasn’t the outgoing type, and he hadn’t felt any need to explore any aspects of his sexual preferences. Lizzy had simply happened to be there, and since he had known her for most of his life he already knew that he cared about her. He had certainly enjoyed the few times they had experimented in the bedroom and he was absolutely sure that he without a doubt enjoyed the female form and all that came with it.

He began chewing on his bottom lip as his mind slowly became a blur; flashes of Alois standing on his knees were playing over his vision, causing his skin to tingle all over. He desperately tried to get the images and confusing thoughts out of his head, but he kept coming back to one particular desire that had plagued him for weeks. He no longer had any way to deny the fact that he _did_ want to _touch_ that aggravating, vexing and frustratingly _entrancing_ blonde.

“Can you like both?” he blurted out and his hand flew up to cover his mouth in horror when he realized what he had just asked his friend. He knew that you could, but he was so profoundly confused by the fact that he might be one of those people and he _was_ still somewhat tipsy, which had his thought process quite muddled.

Finny gave him a frown, looking slightly puzzled, but after a couple of seconds Ciel could see a smile creep its way onto his lips.

“You know… girls… and…” Ciel mumbled, silently wishing for a murderer to barge in and stab him so he didn’t have to continue this conversation.

Finny tried his best to contain a girlish giggle when he said, “Of course you can. You just shouldn’t have both at the same time. I mean… uhm. Oh my god.”

Ciel had to cover his mouth to conceal the huge grin that covered half of his face, but he couldn’t hide that his body was trembling slightly due to the laughter threatening to burst free. His contained joy made his eyes glossy and he had to squeeze them shut for a moment to avoid any tears from forming.

“You know what I mean!” Finny whined and pressed his fingers into his palms to form exasperated little fists against his sides but the small upwards curl on his lips told Ciel that Finny indeed saw the humor in his own words. Ciel wiped away the moisture gathered in the corners of his eyes with the back of his hand and gave Finny a nervous smile.

“Are you mad at me?”

Finny was silent for a few seconds, considering Ciel’s question. “No,” he finally concluded. “And I won’t tell Lizzy. But if you don’t figure this out soon I will have to do something.”

Ciel nodded in understanding and agreement before turning his gaze towards the kitchen entrance.

“I should probably go and talk to Alois…”

When he got there, he couldn’t see pink shorts and white stockings anywhere. He went from room to room but he didn’t find the blonde in any of them. When he eventually came across Hannah in one of the hallways and asked her if she had seen him she simply nodded and answered, “He just left.”

###

“Yes?” Ciel barked in a very irritated tone. Sebastian had called him way too early for his liking and the fact that his head was pounding like a sledgehammer didn’t exactly improve his mood.

“How are you feeling?” Sebastian asked in a calm voice that only added to his annoyance.

“Not bad, you?”

“Really? Cause I heard you went to a party with Alois last night.”

“How do you know about that?”

Ciel dragged himself out of bed and glanced over at Finny, who was still blissfully lost in the land of dreams.

“I have my ways,” he declared in a smooth, amused tone.

“Yeah, I did. So what?”

He went through his dresser, looking for a clean pair of underwear and a pair of pajama bottoms, since he had forgot to change into his nightwear last night.

“Surely you remember your promise?”

“Uhm… I think so…”

“You promised to tell me everything that you two did together.”

Ciel made a sudden halt when a jolt of panic went through him. He was most certainly not telling him _everything_.

“I… We…” he started, unable to hide the embarrassment in his voice. “…It was nothing special, nothing to tell really.”

There was a short paus before Sebastian spoke again.

“Hmm… Okay then. And I’m sure you’re going to the beach with him tomorrow?”

“Of course I am,” he sputtered, purely out of spite. He hadn’t heard anything about this little gathering; Alois had never mentioned going to any beach even before last night and the blonde hadn’t spoken to Ciel at all since the _incident,_ despite the fact that Ciel had swallowed his pride and tried calling him on his way home from the party.

“Then I’m coming too. I haven’t been to the beach in a quite a while.”

“Maybe because it’s winter?” Ciel spat, wondering why anyone would want to go to the beach in December, on a _Monday_.

“There will be a fire, but be sure to bring a blanket.”

Ciel groaned loudly. “I’m not a child; you don’t have to tell me that.”

“My apologies, little brother. See you tomorrow.”

“Mmm. Bye.”

###

**Alois:**  
_Yes, you can come_

Ciel let out a relieved sigh at the sight of the text. It was the first thing he had heard from the older boy since the party, and the text came only a few hours before Ciel and Finny were supposed to meet up with Sebastian and Baldroy.

Ciel had been afraid that Alois wouldn’t answer him at all, but he had decided he would go to the beach even if Alois would agree to it or not. He had to apologize and he needed to explain what he had meant when he said those words to Finny, even if the blonde wouldn’t listen.

Finny had been a little disappointed when Ciel had wished for this to be a “boys-night”, but his friend had been understanding and had agreed to tag along. Ciel didn’t need his girlfriend there when he was about to talk things through with Alois, and if Mey-Rin was invited she would most definitely bring Lizzy even if Ciel asked her not to. Finny seemed to have figured this out by now, because he wasn’t showering him with his usual pile of irritating questions to Ciel’s great delight.

The two of them had spent the last few hours catching up on some studying when Ciel’s phone began buzzing on the bedside table. The two boys quickly grabbed their jackets and ran out to meet Sebastian and Baldroy, waiting outside in Sebastian’s car.

The ride over was filled with jokes and stories of Baldroy’s latest “adventures,” as he’d like to call them. He was currently training to become a soldier and was away more often than he was home, and when they got to see him he had all kinds of peculiar stories to share.

When they got out of the car Ciel could see the light from the fire sparkling in the distance. The chilly air hitting his skin had him shivering in a matter of seconds but he did his best to ignore it. He longed for the promised warmth of the flames and began walking in a fast pace towards the glittering light and the distant sounds of people chatting and laughing.

As he got closer he could hear the joyous tune of Alois’ voice coming from the opposite side of the large fire. Over the scorching flames he noticed that the blonde was wearing actual clothes for once and was wrapped up in a thick, turquoise blanket. The shadows dancing over his face made him look both frightening and dazzling at the same time, and seeing him smile made Ciel stir in a way that he would never admit to anyone.

Not daring to face him yet, Ciel took a seat in the cold sand as far away from the older boy as possible. The rest of his company followed and no one questioned why he wasn’t sitting next to Alois; it might have been because the blonde was surrounded by people already.

Ciel almost let out a gasp when his eyes caught sight of Claude, who had found his way to Alois, and was standing behind his back with the tiniest of smirks playing on his lips. The tall boy clutched the blonde’s shoulders and Ciel tensed up as he prepared himself for something disastrous to happen. He was getting ready to get to his feet when Alois tilted his head back and gave Claude a wide smile, grabbing hold of his arm and pulled him down to sit beside him, forcing the others to scooch over.

Ciel couldn’t believe what he was seeing; had Alois forgiven Claude so easily?

Half an hour went by before Ciel gathered the courage to walk over to where Alois sat. Claude had finally moved away and gone to help out a group of girls trying to start a second fire. He crouched down beside the blonde boy and tried his best to give him a contrite look.

“Can we talk?”

“Oh, Ciel. What a nice surprise. Having a good time?” Alois asked in an indifferent tone as he gazed forward into the flames.

“Uhh, yeah… I guess.” He sat down, not bothering to find out if Alois approved or not; he needed to set things straight. “Look, I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings.”

“I know that. I guess I might have overreacted a bit.”

Ciel gaped in surprise. Was it really that easy?

“Oh… well… I still want to tell you that I did…” He cleared his throat. “…like it.”

“I’m sure you did.” Alois’ tone was cold, but he still had a small smile on his lips when he turned to face Ciel. “But you said that it didn’t mean anything. I don’t care if it didn’t mean a thing to you; I just want to know where I have you.”

“It did… mean... I don’t know what it meant. I’m just really confused. I think… I think that maybe it’s best if we’re just friends for now.” Ciel turned his gaze to the cool pebbles on the ground. “I… I don’t know what to do…”

“You don’t have to do anything, Ciel. Just- WHAT ARE YOU DOING YOU BITCH?”

Hannah looked horrified at the sight before her. Her drink was spilled all over Alois’ lap and a second later he got to his feet looking utterly vicious. A small smirk crept onto his lips as he glared into her blue eyes. The air seemed to stand still for a moment before a loud smack made everyone turn their heads in their direction.

Hannah cupped her slapped cheek with a rueful look in her half-lidded eyes. She didn’t utter one word, as if she accepted Alois’ treatment without question. Ciel got to his feet and grabbed Alois by the wrist and spun him around.

“What the hell are you doing? Are you crazy?”

“I might be,” Alois sneered with eyes gleaming with animosity. “Let go of me.”

Alois ripped his hand back and walked away, leaving Ciel and Hannah alone with all eyes on them.

“Are you alright?” Ciel asked before placing his fingers very gently on the hand still cupping the reddened skin.

“I’m fine, don’t worry about it,” she mumbled.

They sat down on the sand and Hannah stared into the fire with a blank expression - it was nearly impossible for Ciel to figure out what she was thinking. He tried to come up with a way to comfort her but it was really only one thought spinning around in his mind.

“Why do you let him treat you that way?

She turned to face him with a sad smile forced onto her painted lips. “Because I care about him. He…” She turned to stare into the flames once more. “He’s broken,” she finally murmured, her face dark and despondent.

Ciel averted his gaze, wondering what terrible things could have happened to Alois that would cause a person to react the way Hannah did to his treatment.

They didn’t speak for several minutes, until Sebastian came to invite him back to where they were sitting. He claimed that Finny missed him, but Ciel knew that they wanted to hear the details as to why Alois had slapped Hannah. Ciel sighed and turned to the older girl one last time before leaving.

“Will you be okay?”

Her lips curved up into a sincere smile and she gave him a slight nod of her head. Sebastian and Ciel strolled over to their friends and sat down on the cold ground. Just as he thought, Finny immediately began interrogating him. Ciel explained the events as he watched Alois walk over to the second fire that was now burning bright in the dark.

As time went by, Claude’s arm found its way around the blonde boy’s shoulders and Ciel was blatantly puzzled. He couldn’t even begin to understand why Alois would allow him to be close to him after what he did, let alone allow him to be this _friendly._

His heart skipped a beat when he saw Claude leaning over to place his lips on Alois’ cheek. He was almost expecting the blonde to protest, but instead Alois spun around where he sat and put one of his arms around Claude’s neck and pressed their lips together.

Ciel let out an involuntary gasp as he continued staring at the two boys devouring each other with fierce passion. His company picked up on the action and Finny almost fell over in complete shock. Sebastian only chuckled and smacked his hand on his thighs.

“That’s Alois for you. Slapping girls and making out with older guys.”

Ciel took the hidden message in the remark and gave him a snort in retort.

“But he punched him in the face…” Finny whispered, still in a state of consternation.

“That doesn’t surprise me. Claude is a poor excuse of a human being,” Sebastian jeered with disgust twisting his normally calm face.

“Do you know him?” Finny asked.

“We work together at the hotel.”

Ciel felt his stomach twist uncomfortably and one barely audible word slipped past his lips, “Disgusting.”

He felt an unexplainable urge to leave; he didn’t want to remain there for another second. The mere thought of staying made him feel nauseous.

“I want to go home. Can we please leave?”

“Why do you want to…” Finny paused as realization hit him. “Oh.”

Sebastian looked at them both with a quizzical expression before he agreed. “Of course, little brother.”

The foursome walked slowly across the beach towards the small parking lot when a voice behind Ciel made him spin around.

“Where are you going, Ciel?” Alois stopped in front of him, slightly out of breath from the short jog.

“Home,” he simply stated and was about to turn around when Alois seized his arm.

“But Ciel, why would you do that? The night is still young, and I thought you were having fun,” he smirked.

“I was, but then I saw something that made me sick.”

“Aha. Really? And what might that be?”

“You know what I’m talking about!” He was practically shouting the words in Alois’ face.

The older boy frowned and loosened his grip on Ciel’s arm. “Why are you so angry? I don’t get it; I thought you just wanted to be friends? That’s what you said, right?”

“Fuck you.”

He turned around and walked the short distance to the car without bothering to look back to see if anybody was following him.

The ride home was quiet right up until Sebastian opened his mouth and decided to make Ciel’s already miserable evening even worse.

“Friends, huh?”

“Shut up.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter: Alois POV


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _"His little whispers. Love me, love me. That's all I ask for. Love me, love me.  
>  He battered his tiny fists to feel something. Wondered what it's like to touch and feel something."_
> 
> Meg and Dia – Monster
> 
> Considered by many to be a very fitting song for Alois and honestly, listening to it gets me choked up. It almost seems as if the lyrics were written for him and what's even more baffling is that it almost sounds like it's him singing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know I'm always going on about how I love my readers but ugh... I really do and I want you to know that. Some of you even leave comments on every single chapter and I just.... What did I do to deserve such amazing readers? 
> 
> THANK YOU!

“You’re upset.”

“Just shut up and give it to me.”

Claude slipped a small white pill into Alois’ mouth and let his finger slide out just a bit too slow for it to not have an underlying meaning. Alois looked up to gaze into those golden embers and let out a rueful sigh.

”Claude… touch me.”

Claude did not hesitate. He grabbed Alois by his slender waist and hoisted him up to straddle him. The older male’s hands wandered over his pale skin and one found its way under his loose shirt. The other hand found his backside and Claude’s fingers began to crawl under the fabric of the garments to grab at the tender flesh there. Alois leaned in until their foreheads were pressed together and moaned desperately as their breaths mingled.

“Claude, please…” _Make me feel loved._ “Please...” His last plea came out as a needy whisper.

Claude caught his lips and his kisses quickly became feverish. Before long, Alois was sprawled out on the bed, with his legs spread wantonly while Claude was pounding into him without mercy.

_Please… make me feel something. Anything. Just… make me forget…_

Alois turned his head to the side, staring at nothing, and his eyes devoid of emotion. He slowly let them flutter shut and let himself get lost in the drug induced haze and the physical pleasure of friction. His chest felt like it was carved out—hollow and dark—but at the same time there was pain; an immense ache that loomed in his ribcage, threatening to stop his lungs from breathing.

Some part of him wanted to struggle, but the pain had been there for so long that he didn’t know if he dared to live without it. So he suppressed it, he suppressed it all—to the point where he felt empty. Besotted, he let the hollowness engulf him, feeling the ache subside only to come crawling back minutes later.    

Alois curled up into a ball after Claude finally pulled out of him. He faced the wall to try and hide his face from the older boy; he didn’t want him to see the tears burning in his eyes.

“I knew you would find your way back to my bed,” Claude said triumphantly.

“We’re not back together again,” Alois murmured with a slight tremble in his voice but the anguish in his tone went unnoticed by Claude, who was smiling smugly to himself.

“I’ll get you back. You always come back,” Claude asserted with finality before rolling onto his side. He was snoring within minutes.

The strain of holding in his tears almost had Alois trembling and the lump in his throat burned. With the sounds of Claude’s sleeping form, he finally let out a small sigh of relief and a steady stream of silent tears began pouring down his cheeks in the dark.

No amount of sweet words, physical pleasure or chemically manufactured, mind-numbing substances could make it all go away. But it did make it easier to cope with, if only for a short while. It made his misery creep deeper for the blink of an eye, and it was worth it, yet at the same time it wasn’t.

The pain always came back to the surface stronger than ever when it was all over. When the drugs left his system, when the hands on him fell away, when the meaningless efforts to make him _feel_ something of significance ceased to have any effect, the ache came crawling forward and licked and lacerated him inside. He imagined that it always would, that the monster inside of him would keep on tormenting him until the day where he eventually would become truly and irrevocably broken.

###

Alois woke up in Claude’s bed way past noon; he had missed another day of school. _Boo fucking hoo_.

The older boy lay beside him; still snoring like the world depended on it. The blonde felt a pang of disgust at the sight of him, and by extent with himself, so he rolled over to the edge of the bed as far away from him as possible without falling out.

Alois rubbed his swollen eyes and reached down to grab his discarded pants from the floor. He shoved his hand down one of the pockets and pulled out his phone to check the time. The blonde hadn’t expected that there would be a text from Ciel waiting for him. He had been sure his chances of having any kind of association with the younger boy were out of the question by that point, but apparently he had underestimated him.

**Ciel:  
** _I shouldn’t have yelled at you_

Alois wanted to be happy, and some part of him was, but mostly he just felt… terrible. He had acted inexcusably, but Ciel still found it in him to forgive him and give _him_ an apology. As usual, the younger boy surprised him, and the act had his heart practically flying out of his chest. It was impossible to deny it at this point. He had without a doubt fallen for that annoyingly stubborn, proud little runt. And now… he had basically eliminated any chance he had with him by rolling around in the hay with Claude and openly flaunting their carnal desires in front of him. Ciel had gotten angry, maybe even jealous, and the fact that he left the premises on the spot was somewhat an indication of the latter. This could have ruined any small flicker of a chance that Alois had had, if he even had a chance to begin with.

He wanted to think that he did, he wanted to believe that Ciel had some kind of interest in him. Their actions at the party surely pointed in that direction but Ciel had said that it didn’t mean anything; even if he had tried to take it back last night, he hadn’t really done so. Not really.

_“It did… mean... I don’t know what it meant.”_

Ciel’s words echoed in his mind and he felt his chest contract painfully. He tried to swallow but his throat was too dry. Alois dragged himself out of the bed and felt an uncomfortable reminder of last night’s rendezvous trickling down his thigh. He felt disgusting. He just wanted to take a long shower and go to sleep again, but he certainly wouldn’t do that at Claude’s place.

The blonde went to the bathroom and tried his best to clean himself up before getting dressed in yesterday’s clothes and hurried out of Claude’s apartment as quietly as he could.

On his way back to his dorm he pulled out his phone and looked at the text from Ciel again. He considered answering but he had no idea what to write. His whole being told him to be spiteful and rude, because that was just who he was; so damn good at pushing people away with his crude attitude and incapability to admit defeat.

He didn’t think that Ciel had done anything wrong—quite the opposite, but some part of him didn’t want to admit that to the younger boy. He had apologized to Ciel before, but this time was different. Alois felt so ashamed and disgusted over his own behavior that he almost couldn’t bear admitting it to someone else.

Pushing all of his bothersome traits aside with the help of Ciel’s impending forgiveness he eventually managed a somewhat satisfying answer and hit send.

**Alois:  
** _I’m sorry for being a douche_

The answer came almost immediately.

**Ciel:**  
_We’re both idiots. I have one class left, can you come over in an hour? We need to talk._

Alois felt his heartbeat rise in his chest. Maybe he would get a chance to set things straight.

**Alois:**  
_I’d love to_

What a cheesy way to agree, he thought, but he didn’t care. He was elated at the prospect of this situation not being hopeless.

Back in his dorm, he grabbed a towel and some clean clothes and strolled away to the showers, scrubbing his sore skin for a good half hour before he finally felt clean enough. He pulled on his usual black shorts, a pair of black thigh-high stockings and a white hoodie. Finally done getting dressed he grabbed a pair of sneakers and headed off to Ciel’s dorm.

Ciel met him at the door with a small smile on his lips and when Alois walked inside, the younger boy signaled for him to sit beside him on the bed. Ciel’s hands were fidgeting nervously in his lap and Alois felt puzzled as to what he might have to be nervous about.

“I wanted to talk to you because, well… I acted really childish last night.”

Alois couldn’t believe what he was hearing. Ciel, admitting that he had been acting childish? It didn’t seem right, especially since it was _he_ who had been acting like a child, trying to make _him_ jealous.

“Aww, little baby Ciel,” Alois teased and Ciel’s cheeks turned scarlet in an instant. Two seconds later he pushed at the blonde’s shoulder, causing him to fall to the side. The blonde gave Ciel his most scandalized look and the younger boy couldn’t hold back a small chuckle. He swooped down on Ciel and pushed him down on the bed, holding him in place with a firm grip on his wrists. The smaller boy struggled carelessly, and he was actually _laughing_. Even if Alois would have wanted to, he wouldn’t have been able to take his eyes of him in that moment.

It was a beautiful sight, seeing Ciel like that. Mussed hair flowing out against the pillow, slightly flushed cheeks turning darker the more he struggled—and with that unusual faint glint in his eyes that Alois had only seen a few times before on those rare occasions when the younger boy had been genuinely elated.

“L-let me go!” Ciel complained with a loud whine. He was so cute that it made his stomach flutter.

“I will never let you go.”

Alois leaned down over Ciel and trapped him in a tight hug. After a short moment of surprise, Ciel wrapped his arms around him and returned the gesture, but the blonde could feel that the younger boy was careful not to squeeze down to hard.

“I was afraid that you didn’t want to have anything to do with me anymore,” Alois whispered into Ciel’s ear.

“That’s enough, let me go.”

Alois reluctantly released the younger boy but continued to hover over him, with one arm on each side of his head.

“You were wrong about that. But…” He gazed up at the blonde who was hovering mere inches from his face and gave him a frown. “…I did mean the part about us just being friends, so get off me.”

Alois’ heart sped up in an almost painful way as he was reminded of the fact that the object of his affections only desired to be friends with him. Some part of him understood Ciel and he wanted to keep his emotions at bay, but it was hard to stay unaffected when the words were being thrown in his face.

The blonde let out a forced chuckle and sat up on his knees, complying reluctantly with Ciel’s wishes. He knew that he would have to be respectful for now if he wanted to get anywhere with the stubborn boy, even if all Alois wanted was to defy Ciel to the bitter end and kiss him right then and there.

With a staggered moan from the worn out hinges, the door suddenly opened and, to Alois’ surprise, Sebastian walked into the room, followed by a slouching Finny. Ciel’s eyes went wide but a second later his face turned concerned. “Is something wrong, Finny? And why is Sebastian here?”

“I’m standing right here, you can ask _me_ why I’m here,” Sebastian snarled. “I just found this heartbroken little thing on a park bench outside campus so I brought him back here. I figured he could use his best friend right now.” Sebastian turned his gaze to the boy sitting next to Ciel. “Alois,” he greeted the blonde with a nod of his head.

“Sebastian, what a nice surprise,” he sneered sarcastically with a tiny smirk. _Ah, it’s too fun to tease that pompous twat._

Finny sat down on the edge of his bed, looking gloomy and depressed. Sebastian sat down next to him in his usual stiff demeanor, but he didn’t hesitate to put a comforting hand on Finny’s shoulder.

“We just broke up…” Finny mumbled with tears glittering in the corners of his eyes, careful not to meet anyone’s gaze.

“What? What happened?” Ciel burst out in utter dismay.

“Well… we have been drifting apart lately… I think that’s why I’ve acted so differently these past months. I have been a little outrageous lately, haven’t I?” he chuckled without any real joy. “We came to the decision together, but it stills feels pretty bad. We’re still friends though!”

“Oh wow… I’m not sure what to say… do you want to talk about it?”

“Nah, not really… I just want to have some fun and start getting used to the life of a single man,” he chortled, cutting through the stiffness in the air. “Will you guys cheer me up?” he chirped with his usual bright smile.

Ciel let out a small chuckle. “Anything for you, Finny.” He turned his gaze to the older blonde. “Alois?”

Alois shook his head in surprise. _Is Ciel asking me to cheer his friend up?_ He scratched his head, considering different ways to make the younger boy brighten up. Memories of their previous encounters flashed through his mind, and a wicked smile crept onto his lips when he remembered that the seemingly sweet and innocent boy actually seemed to enjoy a bit of obscenity. “Ask and confess? It’s a game.”

“How do you play?” Finny asked, excitement glimmering in his turquoise eyes.

“You can ask anyone in the room anything you want, but you have to confess something related in the process,” he explained. “And you can’t ask the person who asked you directly afterwards.”

“Oh. That sounds like fun!” Finny cheered.

“I can go first… Ciel.” He looked at the younger boy with mischief in his eyes. “I have never had sex with a girl. How do you like having sex with girls, Ciel?”

The startled confusion in Ciel’s face was a delightful sight in the least. Alois let his gaze wander to watch the other’s reactions and while Sebastian looked aloof as always; Finny had a wide grin covering his face and bounced a little on the bed. Alois’ suggested activity obviously did the trick.

“I actually like it very much, thank you!” Ciel finally retorted, trying to keep a stern face. “I had a dream about a unicorn kissing a bat once. Finny, what’s the weirdest dream you’ve ever had?”

Finny’s eyes lit up over receiving a question and he didn’t have to think long before he gave his answer. “Well… it must have been the dream where I had super human strength and Mey-Rin was an assassin. That dream was super intense.”

Everybody but Sebastian burst out in laughter; he just covered his mouth to hide a tiny smile.

“I don’t know who to ask… Sebastian? I have… hmm...” Finny’s cheeks turned crimson in an instant, but curiosity beamed from his eyes when he finally asked his question. “I have only had sex with two people. How many have you had sex with?”

_He’s never going to answer that. Not with that gigantic stick up his ass._

“Thirteen females and three males.”

The whole room fell silent.

_No. Fucking. Way._

“You? YOU? You keep surprising me, Sebastian. Jeez…” Alois said, rubbing his forehead while shaking his head.

“You’ve had sex with MEN?” Ciel looked like he was about to explode into a million pieces at any second.

“On occasion.”

The shocking revelation caused the game to pause as Ciel continued to interrogate Sebastian for over ten minutes. Alois didn’t care much; he couldn’t see what the big deal was. Of course, it might be a big deal for Ciel, and maybe it wasn’t that bad that he found out that he wasn’t that different from the people he cared about. Alois was sure that it was Ciel’s pride and insecurity that stood in the way for him admitting that he was attracted to him. Because he was, wasn’t he?

He shifted on the bed and “accidentally” let his fingers brush against Ciel’s arm and the slight pink tinting his cheeks a few moments later had Alois smiling inwardly.

Yes he was; Alois was sure of it.

“I have actually always wondered what it’s like… you know… having sex with a man. At least once in my life, I would like to try it,” Finny admitted, rendering everyone mute for the second time that evening.

Finally, Ciel let out a loud groan. “You too? I can’t handle th—“ He was cut off by his phone vibrating in his pocket and pulled it out, sliding his finger over the screen to answer.

With Ciel’s gaze facing elsewhere, Alois watched as Sebastian took the opportunity to lean over to whisper something to Finny. It was barely audible but Alois still heard the words as they were breathed into Finny’s ear.

“ _I’ll have to show you someday then, won’t I_?”

Alois smirked to himself.

_Sebastian, you pervert._

Ciel ended the call and looked around the room at his friends. “It was just Lizzy, she said she’s coming by later.” His eyes fell on his best friend and with a frown he asked, “What’s up with you Finny? You look like someone just killed your puppy.”

“Uhm… nothing. Let’s get on with the game!”

“Yes, I believe it is my turn to ask a question,” Sebastian started, composed and relaxed on the soft mattress, with just a hint of a smirk tugging at his lips. “I will admit to having tried drugs in the past. Alois… have you ever done any drugs in the proximity of my brother?”

The blonde let out a faint laugh. “You’re an idiot, Sebastian.”

“Oh… an idiot you say? An idiot wouldn’t get exactly what he sought for.”

“And what might that be?”

The left side of the raven-haired male’s lips curved up just slightly when his eyes fell on Ciel.

“Are you two being serious? What’s this all about?” Ciel burst out in confusion.

Alois sighed. “Sebastian is just getting the information he wants in a very irritating way.”

“So you two are doing drugs, is that what you’re saying?” Ciel asked in a surprisingly calm tone.

“I swear Sebastian…” Alois sighed in exasperation. “It doesn’t concern you, Ciel. Sebastian isn’t doing any drugs. You two are such good little boys and he’s just trying to make sure that I’m not corrupting you.”

“Okay… I should probably get upset about this, and don’t get me wrong, I do have several opinions regarding the matter but… my brain can only handle so much.” Ciel sighed and met his brother’s gaze. “Sebastian, I have never been anywhere near any drugs.” He turned his head to the blonde beside him. “Alois, you should quit. Can we stop talking about this now and continue with the game?”

“Yes please. It’s my turn,” Alois said quickly, grateful that the subject had changed. He was somewhat puzzled as to why Ciel was so calm about the whole drug thing, but he was absolutely not going to question him about it. “Finny. If you ever did get down and dirty with a man—“

“No, not this again.” Ciel groaned loudly and fell back on the bed.

“Oh, be quiet, you prude. As I was saying… if you ever would get the chance to _fuck_ with a _male_ , would you allow that man to stick it up your ass?”

Finny, who had been quiet for a long time, opened his mouth slowly, his cheeks tinted in a faint crimson. “You’re supposed to confess something.”

“Oh, right. I forgot. My ass has had many dicks in it.”

“That’s not a confession, everyone already knows that,” Ciel muttered.

Alois laughed. “It still counts. Finny?”

“I suppose… I would,” the strawberry-blonde boy answered, slightly embarrassed.

“Isn’t that nice? Guys fucking asses and guys sucking dicks; is that all we’re going to talk about from now on?” Ciel snarled from his place on the bed.

No one paid any attention to him.

“Does it hurt?” Finny asked Alois.

“Nah, it’s not that bad. Not if you do it right.”

“Ah, okay… Have you ever done it, Sebastian?”

“Okay, I’m leaving,” Ciel stated, getting to his feet.

“Well…” Sebastian started, but Ciel’s unhappy tone cut him off.

“BYE!” Ciel walked straight to the door and grabbed the handle, but Alois quickly caught up to him, snickering as he spun the younger boy around and pinned him to the door.

“Don’t go. We’ll stop—right guys?”

“Yeah, we’ll stop! Sorry, Ciel,” Finny assured his friend.

Ciel was frowning at Alois, struggling a little against the blonde’s hold. The sight of the younger boy had Alois smiling like a child on Christmas and he leaned in until his face was mere inches from Ciel’s, letting his tongue slip one unseemly sentence.

“I love the blush you get whenever I touch you.”

“Okay, that’s it!” Ciel snapped and broke free from Alois’ grip, angrily barging out the door. The blonde went after the younger boy in the hallway, grabbing his wrist as he caught up to him.

“Ciel…” he almost whispered as he pulled the smaller boy closer to him and wrapped his arms around him.

“Alois!” Ciel whined. “Friends, remember?”

“Yeah, I know… I won’t do anything. I just wanted to apologize properly for my behavior yesterday.”

“It’s fine…”

“I was trying to get you jealous,” Alois confessed without thinking about it.

“I didn’t get jealous! That’s not why I—”

“Then why did you get so angry?”

“Because… it was Claude and…” Ciel rubbed his forehead and groaned. “That’s why I said I acted childish! I was upset about Hannah and when you got all friendly with that idiot I just snapped.”

“I’m sorry about that too…”

“Don’t worry about it. We’re good. Can you let me go now?”

Alois ignored Ciel and pulled him even closer, hugging him tightly.

“Alois…” Ciel murmured in an annoyed tone against the skin on his neck and the blonde loosened his grip and pulled away, looking down at the younger boy.

And there it was; that blush again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Information: Sebby and Finny will NOT start dating in this fic, so those of you who hate the ship can relax. However, I happen to love that ship and… well. I might write a little one shot on the side.
> 
> I hope you liked this chapter even though it was quite sad. I’d love to hear your thoughts!
> 
> Next chapter takes place two weeks later.
> 
> Don't forget to leave kudos :)


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I confused some of you last week with my end note and I’m sorry about that. I did not mean that this chapter would come in two weeks instead of one. What I meant to say was that this chapter takes place two weeks after the game. A lot has happened. Brace yourselves.

Alois and Ciel resumed their previous tradition to talk over the phone for at least half an hour every night before bed. Ciel didn’t even mind that Finny most certainly listened in; it wasn’t like they were talking about anything of a private nature. No, their conversations consisted mostly of mindless chit-chat and simply enjoying listening to one another speak. As _friends_.

It seemed to work, the whole friend thing. They could even spend their evenings studying in silence, just content being in the same room. No words were needed; their relationship had turned into one where nothing such as awkward silence existed and it had become like that rather fast, too. Their clashing personalities seemed to fit oddly well together and Ciel had to admit that he enjoyed every minute he spent with Alois—even the blonde’s vexing habits and continuous pestering had become somewhat endearing.

Finny joined them most of the time. Even Mey-Rin had fun hanging out with them. Alois had found a place in their little group and it was beginning to feel natural to include him in their activities. Lizzy still had a thorn in the side for the blonde, but she tried her best to make him feel included. Her nature compelled her to try and be kind to everyone despite if she liked them or not, but Ciel knew she did it mostly for him.

All in all, Ciel had to say that his and Alois’ friendship seemed to work swimmingly.

Unfortunately, the day finally came, after almost two weeks of getting used to being simply friends, where it all had to get difficult once again. In the dimly lit room, alone for once, lying side by side in Ciel’s bed, Alois felt the urge to speak his mind.

“I have to tell you something…” He let out a sigh and softly, he began stroking Ciel’s pinky with his thumb. “There’s probably no need, because I’m sure you already know this but… I still want to say it out loud, and I need to hear what you think of it.”

Ciel gulped and felt how his heart began thrumming viciously in his chest. The touch—sweet and feather-light, yet ardently powerful—sent tingling sensations up his arm and all the way throughout his entire body. Alois was facing his direction, lying so close that Ciel could feel his hot breath against his cheek.

Small, subtle touches and unexplainable moments where they found themselves lying or standing too close to each other was something that occurred more often than Ciel would have liked to admit. The thing that made him uncomfortable was the fact that he let it happen—he never stopped Alois from showing his affection. He didn’t want to want him doing things like that, but he couldn’t deny the truth. He couldn’t deny the fact that he liked it.

Ciel’s gaze was fixed on the ceiling; he couldn’t look Alois in the eyes, he just couldn’t. He knew what the blonde was about to say and he was baffled when he realized that he wanted to hear it. He had known all along that Alois felt this way about him, but now he couldn’t get himself to push it from his mind and ignore it like he used to. He wanted to hear the words, but at the same time he felt a burning need to run for his life. He was, with every stupefying beat of his fluttering heart, genuinely _afraid_.

“What I’m trying to say is that I have feelings for you. Strong feelings. It’s not like before when I was chasing you around, it’s more than that now,” Alois started and sighed softly before continuing. “I don’t want to scare you away by saying this, but I need you to tell me what’s going on in your head. It’s just that it kinda feels like you feel something for me too… I know you just want us to be friends, so I swear that I’ll do my best not to push you into something you don’t want. It kinda goes against my nature to hold back, but for you I could at least try my best to contain my feelings. Actually I _have_ done my best to contain them. I just need to know if I’m wrong about your feelings for me.”

With the last word, Alois stopped touching him and Ciel could feel the blonde’s burning gaze as he waited for him to respond. The air almost seemed to stand still, and Alois’ words hung in that still air, making it almost impossible for Ciel to form any coherent thoughts. There was only one thing he could think about at the moment.

_Don’t take your hand away…_

Yes, this whole friend thing _had_ worked. Right up until Ciel had found himself craving Alois’ presence more and more; right up until the point where even brushing against him made his heart race; right up until he realized that even the sound of his voice did things to him.

“I think…” Ciel started with a slight tremble in his voice.

There was a long moment of silence before he continued that eventually had the blonde squirming uneasily on the sheets. Ciel finally opened his mouth again, not entirely sure of what exactly it was that he felt for Alois, but certain that whatever he was feeling wasn’t something you should feel when you had a girlfriend.

“I think I need to break up with Lizzy.”

###

Today was a special day, for it was Ciel’s birthday.

Only a day had passed since he had decided to end things with Lizzy but he had trouble imagining himself actually going through with it. He couldn’t figure out how he would go about doing it or what he should say—it was the first time in his life where he had to break up with someone. All of that had to wait though, he had a party to attend and he was the guest of honor.

Ciel wasn’t much for celebrating the day he was born but he had agreed to a small gathering at Sebastian’s, mostly to satisfy his friends than anything else. He was just about to pull on a shirt when a subtle knock echoed through the room. Ciel walked over to the door, thinking it was Lizzy who had come to get him. He grabbed the handle and pulled open the door before he stuck one of his arms in one of the sleeves. His eyes definitely fell on someone with blonde hair, but it wasn’t Lizzy.

“Alois, what are you doing here? I thought you had something you had to do today,” he murmured as he pulled the shirt over his other arm, not bothering to button it.

“I do, but I wanted to give you your gift before I left.” The blonde extended one of his arms and held out a brown rectangular package with a small bow attached to it. “I could have left it outside your door but…” he mumbled with a small chuckle.

Ciel laughed and snatched the gift from Alois’ hand. “What is it?” the younger boy asked and un-wrapped it carefully. He barely registered how the wrapping paper fell to the floor as he gazed down at the bound book in his hands. Ciel let out a small gasp and looked up at the blonde boy with wide eyes.

“It’s the limited edition... this must have been expensive,” he assessed, examining the cover of the rare collection of _Sherlock Holmes_ novels. “He’s my favorite author of all time… and this specific edition… I’ve wanted it for ages. How did you know?”

“You told me once, remember? Anyway, it didn’t set me back that much and—“

Ciel surprised both himself and Alois when he threw his arms around the older boy’s neck and embraced him in a tight hug. “Thank you,” he whispered into Alois’ soft locks. Neither of them let go.

They stood in the doorway embracing each other for what seemed like an eternity before the blonde carefully pulled away and looked down at the younger boy with his hands still resting on his waist. Ciel let his hands slide down over Alois’ upper arms and stopped where they bent, wrapping the fingers on one hand around the muscle as the other one held his gift. There was a long moment where they just stood there, gazing into each other’s eyes without as much as a blink.

Ciel was letting out slow deep breaths trying to control the butterflies flying around in his stomach. He was caught in some sort of trance, drowning in those blue pools staring down at him. This time Ciel didn’t want to push him away, this time he didn’t mind his body against his. The younger boy’s eyes fluttered shut as Alois slowly leaned in, finally giving in to the emotions flooding him. Their faces were so close that Ciel could feel the blonde’s hot breath against his lips, and his heart nearly skipped a beat as he awaited the impending collision.

“Get off of my boyfriend, you disgusting freak!”

Alois released his hold on Ciel and swirled around. Lizzy stood a few feet away, stiff as a board.

“Ciel isn’t perverted like you!” she shouted with a sickened look on her face.

Alois started laughing uncontrollably. “Freak? Perverted? You’re killing me! Got anything else?” he whimpered.

Ciel rolled his eyes at Alois, then took a step towards Lizzy with furrowed brows.

“What are you saying, Lizzy?”

Lizzy frowned when she heard the tone in Ciel’s voice, and the panic in her eyes was hard to miss. “H-he’s… well… he tried to kiss you, Ciel!”

“Lizzy, calm down,” Ciel commanded.

The girl looked over at Alois, then moved her gaze back to Ciel and opened her mouth several times before she finally asked, “Why is he even here?”

“I was just leaving, sweetie,” Alois sassed before he walked over to the blonde girl and flicked her on the nose. She gasped and took a step back while shooting him a murderous glare. Alois waved his hand dismissively in her face and turned to Ciel. “I’ll call you later. Happy birthday.”

“Thanks,” the younger boy murmured, shooting Alois an apologetic look before the older boy turned around and left. Ciel then looked to Lizzy with a frown. “How could you say those things, Lizzy?”

“He tried to kiss you, Ciel!” she repeated.

Ciel was quiet for a few short moments before he nodded in the direction of the open door to his dorm. “I need to talk to you.”

“We’re going to be late, can we do this later?”

“No, we can’t,” he dictated, leaving her in the hallway to walk inside the room.

Lizzy followed him and closed the door behind her, bewilderment evident on her features. Ciel was waiting for her on the edge of the bed and she walked up to him and sat down beside him on the soft covers.

“What’s this about, Ciel? I feel really confused.”

“Tell me about it,” he muttered and looked away, trying to figure out what he wanted to say. Finally he breathed, “I can’t do this anymore, Lizzy.”

“Do what?” she asked in a nervous tone.

Ciel knew he had to say it; there was nowhere to run anymore. Alois had almost kissed him, and the feelings he had felt as the older boy was leaning in to claim his lips were enough evidence to prove that this simply couldn’t go on any longer. He never experienced such strong emotions when he kissed Lizzy. It wasn’t right to string her along anymore. He had to do right by her, but to do that, he had to hurt her.

“I’m so sorry Lizzy, but I don’t love you,” Ciel confessed, looking down at his hands.

Lizzy’s mouth fell open and tears began to form in the corner of her eyes. “W-what are y-you saying, Ciel? Are you b-breaking up with m-me?” she sniveled.

Ciel turned away; he couldn’t bear looking at her tear-stained face. He felt like the worst person in the world, but he knew it had to be done. He had cheated on her and lied to her too many times and by now he was beyond a doubt certain of how he felt about her.

“I’m sorry, Lizzy,” he sighed.

“I d-don’t understand, C-ciel,” she sobbed and grabbed the sleeve of his shirt. “D-does this have s-something to do with Alois?”

“NO! Yes… I don’t know!” he groaned and buried his face in his hands. “I’m texting Sebastian that the party is off,” he mumbled into his hands, then pulled out his phone and sent the text before turning to Lizzy. She had her gaze fixed on him and slowly leaned towards him. She put her arms around him and held him for a long while but all he could do was to stare blankly at nothing.

He felt like a rotten human being for doing this to her, and now she was hugging him like he was her favorite person in the world. He didn’t deserve it and it made him sick. He was just about to push her away when she released him and leaned back.

“I think I understand now,” she affirmed in a calm tone and met Ciel’s gaze. “C-ciel, I’m sorry for saying those things before. I didn’t mean it.” Tears kept streaming down her face but she still managed to give him a small smile. Ciel was taken aback by the change in her attitude and felt his stomach twist uncomfortably. He squeezed his eyes shut and let out a sigh.

“I… I—“

“I really do love you, you know… and I want what’s best for you. I have sensed that something has been going on and I think that I somehow knew this was coming. I can’t explain it, but now that it’s happening—“

“How can you say that? I’m a terrible person!”

“No you’re not. I don’t particularly approve of your choice in men but—“

“Just stop!” Ciel flew up from the bed. With his back facing Lizzy he growled, “Don’t say stuff like that!”

She let out a faint chuckle and was just about to speak again when the door flew open. Finny barged in and he looked like he was expecting a completely different scene. When he saw Lizzy’s tear-stained cheeks he stopped in his steps and looked at her with a puzzled expression.

“What happened? I just got a text from Sebastian saying that we didn’t have to come. I imagined the worst!”

Ciel groaned and turned his head to face his friend. “Please, can you just go?”

Finny looked at Ciel with a worried expression. “Why?”

“Don’t go Finny. I was just leaving,” Lizzy calmly stated and rose up to a standing position. She wiped her cheeks with her sleeve and walked over to the door. Just as she was about to leave she turned around and said, “Happy birthday, Ciel.”

Finny watched Lizzy as she closed the door behind her before he sat down on Ciel’s bed and looked up at his friend where he was standing in the middle of the room.

Ciel sent him a disapproving glare. “Finny, can you please go? I want to be alone.”

Finny ignored him. “Did you two have a fight?”

“No, we didn’t have a fight. I broke up with her,” Ciel growled.

Finny gasped and then nodded in understanding. “I see… are you sure you don’t want to talk about it?”

“Yes, I’m very sure.”

“But—“

“Finny, just leave me alone!”

“Okay, calm down, I’m leaving,” Finny muttered. “I’ll be back in a couple of hours. If you need me any sooner I’ll be in the library. Is Alois—“

“Go.”

“Sorry, okay. I’m going,” Finny said, gathering up the books that were spread over his bed before walking out the room.

Ciel let out a deep sigh and fell down on his bed, burying his face in his pillow. He didn’t feel like being around anyone right know, let alone talk to anyone, but he knew Finny wouldn’t be able to keep silent. He just hoped his friend would be gone long enough for him to be able to fall asleep so that he at least wouldn’t bother him for the rest of the day. Ciel didn’t care that it was only mid-afternoon; he didn’t want to stay awake. He didn’t want to think.

After an hour he finally felt himself drift off into the land of dreams when his phone started buzzing. Ciel groaned and opened the text.

**Alois:**  
_How’s the party?_

**Ciel:**  
_I didn’t go  
_  
**Alois:**  
_Why?_  
  
**Ciel:**  
_I broke up with Lizzy_  
  
**Alois:**  
_Holy shit, you actually did it. You want me to call you?_  
  
**Ciel:**  
_No. I need to think_

Ciel’s phone went quiet after his last text and he sighed his relief into the pillow. He couldn’t talk to Alois right now, he was too confused. He had to figure out what he wanted to do next, but for now he just had to get some sleep. The last thing he saw before he dozed off was a flash of that glimmering summer sky that always seemed to make his knees go weak.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> YEEESSS they finally broke up.
> 
> See you next Thursday. Or Wednesday, depending on the time zone.


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for brightening my life with your kind words. You’re all so amazing.

Ciel’s life had turned upside down since he started college. He had been forced to question his whole being; to reach inside to the very core of who he was. The safe platform he had stood on his entire life was shaking and crumbling under his feet and he felt like he was losing his mind.

Everything that had happened over the past months between him and Alois made his stomach twist and turn in the most uncomfortable of ways, but at the same time it made his chest flutter at the mere thought. The blonde had been absolutely maddening at first, but he had still found his way into Ciel’s life and crushed everything he knew to be true about himself.

The events that took place a few days ago had proven without a doubt that he not only felt something more than just friendly feelings towards Alois and that he probably had for quite a while, but it also made it very clear that he was utterly terrified.

He was afraid of the feelings he was experiencing because they made him question who he was; the picture he had of himself was slowly disappearing and being replaced with a new one.

For two days he had locked himself up in his room, refusing to talk to anyone. Finny had been bugging him on occasion, but after Ciel had gotten so fed-up that he almost managed to throw a book in his face, his friend had finally let him be. Sebastian had tried calling him a few times and had even sent a couple of worried texts since Ciel never told him why he cancelled their plans on his birthday. Sure, Finny had told his brother about the breakup but it seemed as if Sebastian wanted to hear the story from Ciel’s own lips.

Not that he would ever tell anyone the true reason why he needed this.

He would never tell anyone that the reason he needed to be alone was to figure out what he wanted to do about his feelings for Alois rather than his breakup with Lizzy.

He had no idea what to do.

_Should I go to him? Should I talk to him? Should I… kiss him?_

_No._

_Yes?_

Ciel banged his head on the door hard enough to bruise and squeezed his eyes completely shut. He had his palms pressed firmly against the rough wood, trying to decide if he should stay or if he should grab the handle and head out. 

Alois had tried calling him a few times but Ciel had ignored his calls too. If there was someone he absolutely hadn’t had any desire to talk to during these past few days, it was him; not when it was he who was the cause of all of this. Alois had stormed into his life and changed everything. Alois had changed _him_.

Ciel wasn’t even certain of what exactly it was that he felt for the blonde. He could conclude that he felt a strong urge to touch him, to feel his skin under his fingers. Ciel had to admit to himself that the desire had been there from the start. No matter how much he had tried pushing it away, he was constantly reminded, either through dreams or when he was in close proximity of the older boy. Alois always made him feel this rush of… _something_.

Ciel was afraid to even think about what would happen if he went to Alois’ dorm, but he knew that he wanted to go there. That was _all_ he felt; a raging desire to go to him. To be with him.

As he stood leaning against the door, thinking about Alois for what felt like the thousandth time in two days, he finally understood what he needed to do. He realized that he didn’t need all the answers; he didn’t have to know everything. In all of his confusion he found that there was _one_ thing that he was absolutely sure of; he was certain of the fact that he without a doubt in his mind wanted nothing more than to be close to Alois.

_I want to be near him._ _That’s the only thing that really matters, right?_

With that conclusion in mind, Ciel left, and walked all the way to Alois’ dorm without hesitating even once and banged on the door. He had no idea what to expect or what he would do once he entered, he just knew that he needed to be in there with him. His heart was pounding so hard in his chest that his head began spinning and his vision became blurry. Several seconds passed before he realized that a voice was calling out to him from inside the room.

Accepting the invitation, Ciel grabbed the handle and pushed the door open. Alois was laying stomach down on his bed, with his feet in the air. The blonde was wearing nothing but a pair of black pajama bottoms, his chest bare against the soft sheets. A laptop was placed in front of him and his eyes never left the screen to see who had come inside, instead he just muttered, “I fucking told you I was busy…”

“Too busy for me?” Ciel asked in a low voice, still standing in the doorway.

Alois flew up from the bed and looked at the younger boy with big eyes. “Ciel! What are you doing here? You haven’t answered any of my calls, I thought—“

“I just needed some time to think… and I have been thinking. A lot.”

“About what?”

“It doesn’t matter… because I don’t want to think anymore,” Ciel stated and walked over to Alois, grabbing hold of his shoulders.

Perplexed eyes looked back at him, painted with a wide range of unidentifiable emotions. Even if Ciel would have wanted to have access to his brain at that moment it would have been impossible. He got hopelessly lost in that blue sky staring down at him and suddenly everything else in the world disappeared. It was just the two of them, alone in their own little universe.

Ciel let his hands slide up to tangle in Alois’ blonde mess of hair and the air seemed to stand still for a moment. Ciel’s heart was thrumming so hard in his chest that he thought it might fall out. It was him… It was him that he wanted, it couldn’t be clearer, and with a sudden rush of emotions he pulled Alois closer and pressed his lips against his. Alois immediately slid his tongue inside his mouth and folded his arms around Ciel’s torso, pushing the younger boy flush against his larger frame. The kiss quickly became feverish and zealous, as if they both had a sort of hunger controlling them.

Heated moans and muffled grunts filled the small room as exploring hands began clawing desperately at the fabric covering their bodies. Hot puffs of air and slippery saliva met the delicate skin on Ciel’s chest as his shirt fell apart when the last button was forcefully tugged open. Ciel barely had any grasp on reality but he knew that he wanted the older boy currently fondling his growing need. They both wanted each other badly, that much was clear.

Before long Ciel found himself lying with his torso bare on top of Alois in the bed with his lips moving hungrily against his. The blonde’s soft, experienced tongue danced along with his own, eliciting aroused noises from the both of them. Ciel’s head was spinning and he barely knew up from down. All he knew was the body writhing underneath him; the only person who’d managed to make his entire being _tremble_.

Ciel still had trouble admitting it to himself, but he had to realize that this felt so damn _good_. Finally, _finally_ , he had followed his desires. _Fuck, I fucking want him. That idiot… how did he manage to get to me like this?_

Fingernails were roughly being dug into the hot skin on the younger boy’s back by the blonde underneath him as Alois breathed, “ _Mine_ …” into the kiss. The taller boy’s lips curved up into a satisfied smile—Ciel was finally giving in to him, just like the blonde knew he would. _He’s on top of me. He wants me. God, he’s perfect_.

Alois had his slim legs hooked around Ciel’s waist, holding the smaller boy firmly in place as he titled his hips and rubbed up against him. The friction made Ciel’s breath hitch against Alois’ lips and he pushed back, rolling his hips slowly against the other, making the older boy whimper softly with every puff of air escaping him.

Alois finally broke the heated kiss and gazed up at Ciel with glossy eyes and slightly flushed cheeks. The younger boy looked down at him while breathing heavily as he continued moving his body against his. Alois suddenly grabbed hold of Ciel’s hair and tugged his head to the side, giving him easy access to the smaller boy’s neck. Using his tongue, he elicited a delicious grunt from Ciel as he dragged the sleek muscle over the sweat-covered skin. The blonde hummed in satisfaction when Ciel let out another lust-filled sound as Alois’ experienced tongue kept painting his sensitive neck with slippery saliva.

The older boy gave him a playful, sharp nip and glanced up, searching for any signs of disapproval in Ciel’s expression. With his eyes shut tight and his mouth slightly open, the smaller boy’s face showed nothing but sheer arousal which caused Alois to instinctively run his tongue over his lips. Wetness once again met the other’s skin when the older boy flicked the soft muscle over the visible pulse with a tiny smile before biting down roughly while tightening his grip in Ciel’s hair.

Ciel gasped at the sudden flash of pain shooting through him. It hurt, but at the same time felt _good_ , and the mix of pain and pleasure had him trembling and grunting like an animal in heat. A shaky sigh escaped him when Alois sunk his teeth into him again, this time right above his collarbone. The younger boy could feel himself grow achingly hard at the treatment, causing some discomfort due to him still wearing pants.

“Take off your slacks,” Alois breathed against his chest as if he could read his mind. Ciel quickly sat up on his knees and began unbuttoning them with shivering hands. Feeling the need to be hasty, he awkwardly snaked out of the unwanted garment, tossing them away somewhere on the floor.

As Ciel had worked to get loose of his pants, Alois had released himself of his pajama bottoms and was now lying in only his underwear on the bed with his thighs spread slightly. The stiff bulge between his legs was impossible to miss and reminded Ciel of his own erection straining in his underwear which caused him to squirm and huddle.

Alois’ chest was heaving as he stared at Ciel with enthralled eyes, and nothing in his face showed any signs that he took any notice of Ciel’s predicament. Ciel began blushing fiercely and he had to avert his gaze, but he couldn’t look away for too long. His eyes travelled back to Alois almost instantly; seeing him in this state, almost completely naked and waiting for him with need written all over his features made Ciel almost desperate to touch him. He completely forgot about his embarrassment and crawled back between Alois’ legs, leaning in to catch his lips once again. Sloppy kisses were exchanged as their hands roamed, fingers playing blindly over pale skin.

Ciel broke away from the kiss, feeling the need to explore more of the boy underneath him. He was astounded by his own desire and by how right all of this felt. He might have been nervous and slightly abashed, but that couldn’t keep him from letting all of his built up emotions free. He had wanted this for much longer than he initially had been willing to admit, and his entire being was burning with an uncontrollable need for the breathtaking young man sprawled out below him.

Ciel’s lips found their way to Alois’ chest and he delivered wet kisses and soft bites to the tender skin. He flicked his tongue over one of Alois’ pert nipples and with a loud gasp the older boy arched his back and grabbed hold of Ciel’s head, pressing him closer.

Internally, Alois smiled.

He was determined not to take much lead in this, immensely curious about how far Ciel was prepared to take this on his own. The younger boy always let his stubbornness and pride stand in the way of him fully letting go and enjoying himself truly and completely, but Alois could feel the desperation in Ciel’s shivering hands as he explored his male form. He could sense the want burning in Ciel as the other gazed down at him with those engrossing and ravenous, mismatched eyes.

Alois’ heart kept pounding viciously in his ribcage, both from intense arousal and the raging emotions exploding inside of him, filling up every tiny part of him because finally, he had that little runt where he had wanted him for so long—and there was one little fact that made the experience that much more exciting.

Ciel had come to _him_.

The younger boy’s hands kept roaming over every inch of the blonde’s upper body until they found their way to the hem of his underwear. At this point Ciel was so completely aroused that he without hesitation began pulling them down over the older boy’s hips. He released the hard, pink nub and pulled the offending garment down Alois’ long, slender legs. The blonde whimpered and panted and reached his arms out to pull him close again, but Ciel didn’t move a muscle. Instead, he stared down at Alois with wide eyes, in complete amazement.

Alois was beautiful.

The picture on display before him was incredibly erotic: half-lidded icy eyes clouded with lust, angelic, blonde hair disheveled against the pillow, scarlet cheeks and swollen, rosy lips—all stunning details showing off every ounce of their passion for each other. Although, the most breathtaking of all was without a doubt seeing Alois’ slim form sprawled out on the soft sheets, craving nothing more than _him_.

He felt so unbelievably drawn to Alois at that moment, and he was overwhelmed by the want he was experiencing. _I want him, I fucking need him._

Strong hands grasped Ciel, who let out a low growl as the two boys once again embraced each other and began exploding sweaty skin with greedy hands. Fumbling fingers played and roamed fervently until Ciel suddenly stopped in his movements when he realized where he was heading. Ciel let his hand hover over the hard length for several seconds while he was trying to figure out what he should do.

Alois noticed his hesitation and gave him a reassuring smile. He grabbed Ciel’s hand and gently lowered it down onto his erect member and the younger boy’s heart was pounding so hard in his chest that he was sure that Alois could hear it. He was about to touch another mans…

Ciel’s breath got caught in his throat when he felt the tight skin against his damp palm. Carefully, he wrapped his fingers around the shaft and held it like that for a few seconds before he slowly started moving his hand back and forth, just like he would do to himself. It didn’t feel nearly as weird as he thought it would.

Alois moaned and writhed under him as he curiously tried stroking him faster and Ciel’s breathing became even heavier when the pleasured sounds reached his ears. Ciel was just about to kiss the other’s neck when the blonde’s fingers tangled in his mussed hair and tried to push him down. Ciel’s heart sped up once more and he began trembling nervously. _Does he really expect me to…?_

Alois wanted to laugh when he felt how the smaller boy shivered against him, carelessly refusing his attempt to encourage him. Ciel was barely resisting, and the blonde could hardly contain his own curiosity. Admittedly, he had no idea if Ciel would go through with it or not, and it was extremely titillating to test his limits.

Ciel was close to panicking, but at the same time he felt this burning need coursing through him and he had already concluded that he wanted to do this with Alois. He had just never allowed himself to imagine the specific activities that _he_ might be engaging in if they were to end up in this situation.

_Get a grip, Ciel. This is what two guys do in bed_.

With his heartbeat thrumming in his ears, he let himself get pushed down until he was lying between Alois’ legs with his face only inches from his cock. He still felt hesitant for a few short moments before Alois let out a breathy moan that sent a jolt straight down to his own strained member, causing it to twitch.

Arousal shook Ciel and he stopped moving his hand as he looked up at the older boy who was panting and gazing down at him through heavy lids with an odd sort of satisfaction glimmering in his eyes. Ciel took a deep breath before he gave the head an experimental lick and Alois responded with a faint gasp. _I can do this._ Ciel proceeded by tracing his tongue over the hot skin several times, until Alois’ length was glistening with saliva and the older boy was writhing and whimpering desperately. The blonde’s grip on his hair tightened increasingly and he tried to push him closer, causing Ciel to let out a shaky, nervous breath.

“Nnn… Ciel… m-more.”

_Okay, here goes nothing._ Ciel lowered his head and took the tip of Alois’ sizable cock in his mouth and slowly swallowed more and more of the length until he couldn’t fit anymore, and all the while his body quivered with anxious shivers.

Hesitantly, he began bobbing his head slowly, but as Alois began squirming and bucking his hips he increased his speed. His own member began to throb as more noises of pleasure escaped the older boy’s lips and he completely lost himself in his task, utterly overtaken by a greedy desire to hear more of those sounds. His mind was so thoroughly dazed that he didn’t even realize that he was letting out small moans around Alois’ length until he heard the blonde’s voice coming from the top of the bed.

“C-ciel—nn! You… ah… r-really like this, huh?”

Ciel’s face instantly lit up with a burning blush and he let Alois’ member slide right out of his mouth to flop down onto his stomach as he was completely mortified.

“D-don’t be embarrassed. It’s a good thing, right?” Alois panted and raised his upper body slowly until he was sitting upright. “You’re doing really well, you know,” he assured him and snickered softly at Ciel’s expression before he reached over to the drawer on his bedside table and pulled out a small bottle and a condom. Ciel’s eyes went wide and his heart sped up again, as he was reminded of the fact that he had no idea how this how this was going to play out.

“I—I… h-how…” Ciel stammered, almost starting to regret this whole thing.

Alois let out a faint chuckle, thoroughly enjoying Ciel’s flustered state. “Just relax. I’m not going to pound your ass tonight—it’s your first time. But considering the state you’re in…” he smirked while gazing down at Ciel’s impossibly hard bulge. “…I’m pretty sure you wouldn’t mind pounding mine.”

Alois slid down on the sheets until he was lying down again and looked over at Ciel, who was staring at him with his lips slightly parted. To say that the younger boy was in a complete state of apprehension would have been an understatement, and millions of thoughts raced through his mind as he considered the blonde’s words. He had of course imagined them doing that, but being this close to actually going through with it had him thoroughly tremulous. But he knew that he wanted to do it; there was no way to deny that fact. The mere thought had his mouth watering and his cock twitching in its restraints.

“Get your nervous ass over here,” Alois commanded in a surprisingly calming tone.

Ciel didn’t have a say in the matter, because despite his feelings of consternation, his body wanted nothing more than to feel Alois’ skin against his. Shivering limbs moved on their own accord until he once again was lying on top of Alois, who grabbed his hand and poured the cold liquid over his fingers.

“Just start with one at first,” Alois instructed him as he guided his hand in between his legs and Ciel was beginning to fear that he might faint from sheer nervousness. He was actually pretty amazed with how his dick could keep standing through all of this.

_Okay, okay... calm down. This is what you wanted, remember?_

Ciel stared at Alois for a moment before he let one of his fingers brush over his entrance. Alois gasped at the cold sensation, but nodded reassuringly when he saw the concern in the smaller boy’s eyes. Ciel took a deep breath and forced himself to relax before he carefully slid one of his fingers into the tight opening. The thought of him performing such a lewd act was both a little unnerving as well as oddly thrilling to Ciel, who shook his head to gain some sensebefore he started thrusting his finger back and forth in a cautious pace, reveling in the tight heat that engulfed him.

They never broke eye contact as Ciel prepared Alois, and he slowly began losing himself in the sounds and movements of the older boy. The blonde was panting by the time a second finger was being pushed in and he let out a satisfied moan when Ciel tried wiggling his fingers around. When Alois finally could accommodate a third one, the older boy reached down and pulled Ciel’s fingers from his slick entrance.

“I need you to fuck me, Ciel,” the blonde breathed as a shiver shook his body.

Ciel was trembling with arousal and hearing Alois say those words… He rose up on his knees, ready to discard of the remaining fabric covering his body but when he reached for his underwear he froze up.

“I’m…” he started but he wasn’t sure what he wanted to say.

Alois chuckled softly before giving Ciel a teasing grin. “You’re too cute when you’re nervous. Let me take care of those nerves for you,” he purred before maneuvering himself so that he was standing on all fours in front of Ciel with his face only inches from his clothed erection. The blonde let his tongue slide over his upper lip before he put his salacious mouth over the hard flesh and began sucking lightly through the fabric. Ciel immediately reached for Alois’ tousled hair as a needy moan flew past his lips, gripping the blonde strands roughly.

“Alo—Alois…” the younger boy breathed as the blonde grazed his teeth over the hot bulge with a hungry look on his face. Alois raised one hand to the hem of the garment, pulling them down slowly to rest around Ciel’s knees, listening to the other’s beautiful, hitching breaths as he did so. The achingly hard length sprung free and the head fell perfectly on Alois’ lips, who smiled contentedly before parting them to take Ciel’s cock in his mouth.

Ciel whimpered and tightened his grip in the older boy’s locks, unable to focus on anything other than the wet feeling of Alois’ hot tongue against his member. Ciel tilted his head back as the blonde slurped and swallowed around the tight skin, causing the younger boy to moan softly with every breath escaping him. The blonde’s tongue rode up and down the underside of his shaft as he bobbed his head while stroking his balls softly with his hand. Ciel soon found himself panting, already feeling that familiar heat beginning to pool in his gut.

Alois suddenly pulled away and Ciel stared as the other opened the condom with his teeth before he lowered it onto Ciel’s member. The blonde proceeded by slicking him up with lube, looking up at Ciel while he did so.

“There, you’re all done. Now _fuck_ _me_ ,” Alois demanded both playfully and harshly as he lay back, spreading his legs invitingly.

The sight of the wanton blonde mixed with the throbbing of his cock was enough to snap Ciel out of all the nervousness he still felt and with one quick movement, he was on top of Alois again.

“Should I just…?”

“Just stick it in, pretty boy.”  

Ciel ignored the nickname and leaned in to press his lips against Alois’ in a sloppy, hungry kiss. He ran his hands up and down he blonde’s thighs before taking his own slicked up member in his hand, rubbing the tip against Alois’ stretched opening. The blonde panted against Ciel’s lips and he moaned as the younger boy experimentally rolled his hips, causing the head of his cock to push against the tight entrance.

“Stop… teasing and... fuck me already,” Alois commanded between heavy breaths and threw his arms around the smaller boy’s neck. Ciel did his best to oblige and pushed in slowly at the same time as he caught Alois’ lips in another kiss. The blonde whimpered and panted as he eased himself in further and Ciel’s eyes shot open when he felt the other’s inner walls squeeze around his member.

“H-holy… hhaah…” Ciel moaned and shook all over. Alois grunted beneath him and locked his legs behind his back, pushing himself up against Ciel so that his entire length was buried to the hilt in his tight, scorching hole.

“Oh fuck…” Alois groaned as his head flew back against the pillow, brutally digging his fingernails into the younger boy’s shoulders. Ciel hissed at the pain, but he didn’t complain. Instead he began rocking his hips carefully, eliciting a series of delicious sounds from the blonde. This only egged him on and he thrust in with more force, slowly beginning to lose all control as intense pleasure started coursing through his body. He set a cautious pace, worried that he might hurt Alois if he went as fast as he really wanted to. He was trembling with need but he continued forcing himself to take it easy when the blonde suddenly latched on to him and groaned loudly.

“M-more… aah, I need… _harder_ …” Alois huffed, desperately jerking his lower body upwards to get him to speed up.

Ciel let out several loud moans when Alois moved against him, clenching around his member with every rock of his hips, and there was no way he could say no to his plea. “Nnnn… _yes_ …” he breathed and suddenly a daunting fire lit up inside of him.

In that moment it was as if something that had been buried deep inside of him this whole time just got released for the first time and he held nothing back as he started pounding into Alois without mercy. Lewd sounds filled the small room as their bodies collided time and time again.

“A-alois… G-god… you feel… ngh,” Ciel mumbled between thrusts, eyes pressed shut and every inch of his teenage body burning. His hard cock kept sliding in and out of the blonde’s hole in a fast pace, the pleasure making him dizzy and unfocused.

Alois suddenly pulled him closer, shoving his wet tongue in his ear before he moaned a command, “Hahh. Fuck me like you mean it—ugh! F-fuck—fucking break me!”

Looking up under sweaty bangs, Ciel seized his movements, roughly grabbing onto Alois’ hips and raising them higher before sharply jerking his hips forward, slamming his member in deep inside of the other. Ciel’s eyes were beaming as he kept pounding into the older boy in a ruthless manner and he couldn’t hold back a satisfied smile when Alois’ eyes shot open and the blonde practically screamed out in pleasure. Alois arched his back and began tossing and turning as Ciel’s thrusts became more frantic.

“A-aah—G-god—ah! Don’t f-fucking stop, Ciel—aah, shit!” Alois panted and gasped, and his frame quivered under Ciel’s firm grip on his hips. The sounds escaping Alois’ lips sent shivers throughout Ciel’s entire body and it quickly became evident that he wouldn’t be able to hold out for much longer. Caught in the moment and lost in pleasure, he didn’t hesitate when he wrapped his fingers around the blonde’s hard cock and began pumping it in time with his thrusts.

“Ngh—FUCK!” Alois practically wailed while clawing at the sheets, and it didn’t take long before his breathing became ragged and his body tensed up completely. “I’m gonna come… I’m—a-ahh!” The blonde’s shaft throbbed in the younger boy’s hand as pearls of white liquid poured out of him, landing on his stomach and chest. Soft whimpers rolled on Alois’ vocal cords as he pursed his lips and squeezed his eyes shut as the last blissful sensations went through him.

Ciel thought he had a few more seconds but when Alois reached his peak he squeezed down on Ciel’s cock mercilessly to the point where he was seeing stars. He felt his own climax crash over him in mind-blowing waves of intense pleasure and Alois kept tightening and releasing around his impossibly hard cock, milking him of every drop from the inside. Moaning faintly, he rode out his orgasm with weak thrusts before completely collapsing of exhaustion on top of Alois.

They were both panting intensely in the blissful aftershocks of their activities, completely spent and unable to move. The laid like that for a few minutes until their breathing began returning to normal. Alois reached up to pet Ciel’s head affectionately before he pressed his lips against his damp and disheveled hair.

“Ciel…” he whispered. “Are you alright?”

There was no answer, and when he tilted his head to look at his face he discovered that the younger boy had fallen asleep against his chest. Alois smiled in adoration and wrapped his arms around Ciel’s smaller frame in a tight hug before shaking him slightly by his shoulders. When he didn’t respond he used more force but the boy lying on top of him still didn’t move a muscle. With an amused smile on his lips he sighed and muttered, “Damn virgins…”


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter: LOL
> 
> We’re halfway done with this story now. All of you who are following and commenting are just so… wonderful!
> 
> I want to give out a special thank you to some of you.
> 
> Kimberly, Paige, Bella, Carrie, Jess, Berry and Sara, you have been so amazing. I’m so happy to have you guys with me on this. Honestly, this story would be crappy without your help and support. Thank you.

Ciel nuzzled his face into the pillows, inhaling their scent. It felt like he had slept on clouds. He curled up into a ball and squirmed around a little under the soft blankets when he felt an arm around his waist. Initially he flinched, but then he slowly started to remember where he was–and who was lying beside him.

As his mind gradually began to clear up from its somnolent haze, it dawned on him what the two of them had done last night and when it all began to sink in he actually felt… _relieved_. It felt as if a huge weight had been lifted from his shoulders and with a shocking realization it became clear just how much he had wanted this. He had finally stopped fighting it and embraced the thought of him liking that fool of a blonde. _I really put up quite a struggle, didn’t I?_

He yawned and stretched out his sore limbs before turning around so that he could look into his lover’s big, heavenly blue eyes for the hundredth time. Through heavy lids, Alois met his own tired gaze and the blonde’s lips curled up into a small smile before he snuggled closer to the younger boy.

When Alois’ warm cheek was being pressed up against his bare chest, Ciel felt a confounding urge to feel more of him. He couldn’t explain it; he wasn’t exactly the cuddling type and he still wasn’t sure about what exactly it was that he wanted to get out of all of this. Still, Ciel allowed his limbs act on his aspiration and hesitantly put his arms around the blonde, holding him for a few moments before the younger boy decided to give in fully to his desires, burying his face in Alois’ messy hair.

“I fell asleep,” Ciel whispered against the soft strands.

Alois chuckled softly and released himself from the younger boy’s embrace to look him in the eyes.

“Yeah, you kinda did.”

“I didn’t mean to.”

“It’s alright,” the blonde assured him before letting out a small laugh. “The condom though. I tried to wake you up, but you were completely out of it. You owe me one for that,” he teased and Ciel turned away instantly, completely mortified. His cheeks flared up until they had the same color as a fire truck; he couldn’t have been more embarrassed even if he’d tried.

“Oh my god,” Ciel yelped in a muffled voice as he buried his face in his hands, rolling over to lie on his back. “You took it off?

“I couldn’t have left it on you, could I?”

“Do you have a gun I could borrow?”

Alois let out a heartfelt laugh and snuggled closer once more, placing his head on Ciel’s shoulder as he tugged on the younger boy’s wrists in an effort to get him to stop hiding his face.

“Don’t be such a baby. I guess it happens? It’s never happened to me th—“

“Stop! I don’t want to hear anymore,” Ciel pleaded, still holding his hands over his face. Alois pulled harder and sat up to straddle his hips, not bothered in the least by the fact that the both of them were completely naked. The blonde used all of his might to get Ciel to let go, and when he finally succeeded he forced his arms down on either side of the younger boy’s head and held them in place with his knees. Ciel gasped and squirmed, trying to get loose, doing his best to ignore the fact that Alois’ member was rubbing against the skin of his stomach. Alois giggled mockingly and leaned closer, tracing his wet tongue over Ciel’s flushed cheek.

“Aahh stop! That’s disgusting!”

Ciel bucked his hips and tried to release his arms, but with Alois’ weight pushing them down it was nearly impossible.

“Woho, rodeo!” Alois chuckled and licked him once more, this time on his chin.

“Let… let me… go!” Ciel squealed in a strained voice, cheeks boiling hot with irritation while he continued writhing and even kicked his legs in frustration. Alois snickered in delight and finally scooched down so that his knees slid off of Ciel’s arms, but the blonde still kept a firm grip on his wrists using his hands. Ciel kept fighting for a few more seconds, until even the hold on his arms loosened; Alois seemed to have redirected his focus to something completely different than keeping him in place. Ciel’s tensed when he felt the blonde’s fingers relax; he could easily push him off now if he wanted, yet something made him keep his position. Instead of breaking free, he stared up at the older boy now hovering over his face, trying to decipher the unusual look in the blonde’s face. They stayed like that for a few moments before Alois leaned in and flicked his tongue gently over Ciel’s pursed lips.

Ciel had mentally prepared himself to struggle against the blonde’s next move but when he felt the softness of the touch he was a bit taken aback. As Ciel continued gazing into the other’s eyes he saw something there that he hadn’t seen before, or maybe he just hadn’t noticed it. It was almost like a small fire burned behind them; hot, blue flames fueled by undefinable emotions.

The following seconds felt like hours before Alois finally lowered his head and caught the younger boy’s lips in a sweet, tender kiss. His tongue moved with Ciel’s like they had been made to follow the same rhythm, and arousal immediately flared up inside both of them. Ciel released his hands from the other’s hold and put them under Alois’ arms, sliding them down slowly to finally rest on his waist. Before the blonde could react, Ciel flipped him over and positioned himself on top of him, placing his lower body perfectly between the older boy’s legs. They resumed the kiss with fierce passion, practically devouring each other, tasting and biting every inch of each other’s lips and mouths.

Hands were suddenly everywhere, exploring lustfully in the morning light. Alois trailed his fingers down Ciel’s bare back and the younger boy shivered and moaned softly against his lips. When he reached Ciel’s smooth backside, he took a firm grip with both hands on each side and dug his fingernails in deep. Ciel broke the kiss in an instant, hissing at the sudden pain.

A low growl thrummed deep in the younger boy’s chest before he jerked his hips forward, pushing his growing need against the stiffening ridge between Alois’ legs. The older boy gasped and moaned at the sudden friction, bucking his own hips in retort at the same time as he once again clawed at the soft skin of Ciel’s ass. A series of lewd sounds came from the smaller boy as he began rubbing himself with intense fervor against the blonde, coaxing them both into full arousal in seconds.

Alois suddenly opened his eyes and gave Ciel the most hungry and vicious look he had ever seen on the older boy.

“I need to taste you,” Alois growled before roughly pushing Ciel off of him and onto his back.

###

Alois roamed around the room, looking for something. Ciel hadn’t bothered listening to whatever he had been gibbering about after their sudden rematch—he was far too exhausted. And now, watching Alois as he moved about, the only thing he could focus on were the faint scars on the blonde’s back. While examining the pale marks from the short distance, he wondered how he hadn’t noticed them before.

“What happened on your back?” Ciel asked, raising his eyebrows. He shifted a little on the bed until he was in an almost sitting positon, with pillows propped up behind him against the wall.

Alois turned around, looking slightly off while simply stating, “I fell down some stairs when I was younger.” He returned to rummaging through his closet, finally pulling out a clean shirt.

“Stairs? How did you get those straight lines from—“

“I’m starving! Do you want to go to that pizza-place that just opened up?”

Ciel frowned at the sudden change of subject, but decided he wouldn’t linger on it. He was pretty certain that Alois wouldn’t tell him what really happened anyway.

“Sure, I guess,” he murmured, sliding off the bed. He grabbed his discarded clothing and pulled them on, feeling a little disgusted by the fact that he had to put on dirty clothes. “Can we stop by my dorm first? I want to change my clothes, if you don’t mind.”

Alois chuckled softly while buttoning the pants he had chosen. “Sure. We should really shower later too.”

Ciel nodded, wondering to himself if Alois meant that they should shower together or not. He had never done that with anyone before, not even with Lizzy, but at this point he couldn’t find it in him to mind. He had already crossed every border, and done things he never expected of himself. Showering with another person would be nothing compared to the things he had done up until this point.

They headed out to the fast-food restaurant after a quick visit to Ciel’s dorm, which thankfully had been empty. Just in case, he had made Alois hide behind a corner in the hallway while he got changed. Ciel was pretty much past the point of being ashamed; he just wasn’t ready for anyone to know yet. It was too soon, too new, and he had just broken up with Lizzy a few days ago.

The two boys stared at the large menu above the counter, trying to decide on what to eat. Ciel only felt confused by all the different choices and was about to give up when he felt his stomach rumbling. He reached down and clutched it when Alois snickered, giving him a teasing smile.

“Hungry? I would be surprised if you weren’t, after all the physical activities you ha—“

“Will you stop it?” he snapped, feeling a blush beginning to spread across his dismayed face.

Alois only chuckled in response, waving a dismissive hand in Ciel’s face. “Go get us a table while I buy our food—and yes, I’m buying. No arguing. You know what you want right?

“I have no idea what’s good here,” he muttered. “Pick something for me.”

He regretted his words as soon as they flew out of his mouth. He wouldn’t be surprised if Alois ordered him something disgusting and weird just for the hell of it. At any other time he might have been right, but when the blonde got to the table the younger boy had chosen, he had two proper meals with him, causing Ciel to sigh in relief.

Alois sat down, placing two trays with three slices each on the table and they both started eating, letting the food silence them. It wasn’t until almost all the pizza was gone that Alois opened his mouth and asked something that Ciel knew he must have wanted to ask ever since last night.

“So… this. Was this a one-time thing or what?” He sat back against the bench and crossed his arms casually. “Oh wait, two-time thing,” he grinned.

Ciel frowned and looked away. He still wasn’t sure what he wanted this to lead to. He had done what he wanted in those moments, but he hadn’t come any closer in figuring out what he wanted to do later on. Hell, he didn’t even know what he felt at this very moment.

“I’m not sure if I can answer that.”

“It’s fine if you only wanted to try it out.”

Ciel wasn’t sure if Alois was being sincere or not, and furrowed his brow before mumbling, “It’s not like that…”

“Fine, fine,” the blonde grunted while waving his hand disrespectfully in Ciel’s direction. “But tell me one thing. How was it?” Alois practically had excitement painted all over him while he waited for an answer.

Ciel gasped and looked up from the table to meet the blonde’s sparkling gaze. “I’m not going to tell you that!”

“But Ciel,” he whined. “You have to give me something!”

Ciel sighed and figured that he probably was right. Alois did deserve some kind of conversation surrounding the subject. Maybe he needed to talk about it too; he just wasn’t sure what to say.

“Fine,” he snarled. “It was… different.”

“What a disappointing answer,” Alois muttered, looking away with his lips slightly pouting.

“What do you want me to say? That it was mind-blowing? That it was the best sex I’ve had in my entire life?”

Alois looked up with glimmering eyes and sat up straight on the bench, placing his hands on the table in a rough manner and bawled, “That’s more like it!” He paused for a moment before he curled his lips up into a malicious grin. “Was it?” he purred while wiggling his eyebrows at Ciel.

Ciel immediately regretted having blurted out his previous mock praises and gritted his teeth trying to come up with a witty retort. Unfortunately, his brain seemed to go on a very convenient vacation whenever Alois was around.

“It was great, Alois,” he finally admitted in a strained voice. “Can we please talk about something else?”

The blonde smiled to himself and murmured, “Whatever you want, prude.”

Ciel rolled his eyes and wanted to deny the accusation when a worried thought popped up in his mind. He might have enjoyed every second of what they had done together so far, but what if Alois thought it was terrible? _It_ was _my first time; he can’t expect me to be an expert_ , Ciel thought, but he didn’t manage to reassure himself.

Carefully, and very embarrassed, he asked, “How was it… for you?”

_Did I really just ask that? Ugh, how does he manage to turn me into this… this self-doubting, blushing wimp?_

“I’ve had worse,” Alois answered, casually inspecting his fingernails.

Ciel’s mouth fell open and his face turned a couple of shades darker. His whole body tensed up and he averted his gaze, feeling his pride crumble more with each passing second. He really shouldn’t have expected anything else, but somehow he had hoped for something a little more reassuring. He didn’t want Alois to see how his answer had affected him and tried to shake away the unease covering his features, but without much success.

Alois seemed to notice Ciel’s distress and quickly added, “I’ve had _a lot_ worse; you have no idea. You did fine, Ciel. Don’t worry about it. I actually can’t believe you su—”

“Shut the fuck up right now or I’ll punch that shit eating grin right off your face, you…” Ciel fumed and swallowed hard, barely able to keep himself from saying something degrading. He didn’t want to hurt Alois, but with his pride dented and embarrassment flushing over him it was nearly impossible not to. Yet he somehow managed to keep his tongue in check for the sake of Alois’ feelings. Ciel had known what he had gotten himself into when he decided to be friends with that annoyingly intriguing pain of a human being, and if he had to be completely honest… he even found the vexing parts of Alois to be incredibly interesting.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have some announcements to make:
> 
> 1\. I’m going away on a trip for a few weeks and I won’t be able to update any fics for some time. I'm not sure when I'll be back and able to write again, but if you click the "Subscribe"-button you will get an email when I post the next chapter. I'M SO SORRY GUYS. *hugs* Please don’t hit me.
> 
> 2\. I am currently working on a second Cielois fic. It will be an AU and they will be a little bit younger than in this fic. I can’t really say anymore – I don’t want to ruin the surprise ^.^ First chapter will be posted when I get back from the trip!
> 
> 3\. I think I forgot to tell you guys about this, but if you’re a multishipper like me, you might enjoy the Sebby/Alois fic I posted a few weeks ago. It’s called _Ravenous_.
> 
> LOVE YOU GUYS!


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m back! Thank you guys for being so patient with me! Now, I’m sorry to say that I can’t promise that a new chapter will come every Thursday because this summer is really busy for me but I will certainly do my best to keep them coming! If you want to know when I post a new chapter you can always follow me on tumblr: touch-me-trancy.
> 
> *hugs all of you* I really hope you enjoy this chapter!

Alois had been missing for two days without so much as a word. After their afternoon pizza, they had gone separate ways. Ciel had gone back to his dorm to face a very suspicious Finny, and Alois… well, Ciel had assumed that the blonde had gone back to his own dorm but according to Hannah he had gone somewhere else.

The older boy’s phone had been conveniently turned off and not even Hannah seemed to know where he was, or she simply chose not to tell him. Either way, all of this seemed very odd. Ciel had never had any trouble reaching Alois whenever he had wanted to before.

What baffled Ciel the most was that Hannah hadn’t seemed troubled at all when he had called to ask her. It had almost sounded as if she was used to him disappearing like this. Maybe he did, but why? And where was he?

Ciel decided he should try checking the blonde’s dorm in case he had returned by now. Alois might not want to talk to him and that was fine, but Ciel wanted to at least know why. He wasn’t used to people ignoring him like this, and after what the two of them had done together he actually began to wonder if the blonde was purposely avoiding him.

Maybe their steamy adventures between the sheets were all that Alois had wanted to get out of their friendship, and now when the blonde had reached his goals, Ciel wasn’t fun to toy with anymore. The thought made him absolutely furious and Ciel quickly decided that he wasn’t going to let Alois treat him like that—like some kind of object; a prize to be won and then forgotten.

Had he really let that blonde idiot fool him like that? Was all of this nothing but a fun little game to Alois?

Ciel growled to himself and quickened his steps. When he finally reached the worn out wooden door, he could barely keep himself from banging on it with all his might. Still, Ciel didn’t want his emotions to be too obvious and therefor took a deep breath before he knocked two times in the politest manner he could muster.

Timber was on the other side of the door when it opened and Alois’ roommate frowned when he caught sight of Ciel.

“Ciel… What are you doing here?”

“I’m looking for Alois. Is he here?” Ciel asked rather harshly and tried to peek around the purple-haired boy.

“No, he’s not here right now. When he gets back I’ll tell him you stopped by,” Timber assured him, ready to close the door when Ciel’s fingers curled around the wood to hold it open.

“Timber, wait. Just tell me one thing,” Ciel pleaded with a small sigh. “Does he do this often—disappear like this? I haven’t heard a peep from him in over two days.”

“He… well…” Timber started and sighed deeply before continuing. “You have to ask him yourself. It’s not for me to tell you.”

“How can I ask him when he doesn’t speak to me?” Ciel unintentionally snapped and rubbed his forehead in exasperation.

“Ciel, I’m sure he’ll explain everything when he gets back. He’ll be back soon—he’s never gone more than a couple of days at most.”

“Where has he been? I don’t—“

“What are you doing here, Phantomhive?”

The voice coming from behind him was too deep to belong to Alois. Ciel whirled around and was standing face to face with Claude.

“Oh, hey _Claude_. Alois isn’t here right now,” Timber stated in a much colder tone than when he addressed Ciel. The purple-haired boy turned back to Ciel and gave him an apologetic look. “Sorry, Ciel, but I really have to get back to my books. I’ll tell Alois you stopped by the moment he gets here.” Timber began closing the door and muttered something that sounded like “ _damn four eyes,_ ” before he left the two boys alone in the hallway.

“I don’t like to repeat myself. What are you doing here?” Claude fumed and narrowed his eyes. “I really don’t like how you keep following my boyfriend around.”

Ciel raised one eyebrow and looked at the taller boy with a confused expression. “Boyfriend? He’s not your boyfriend.”

“We’re just taking a little break. He always comes back to me.”

Even though the tall boy looked quite frightening, Ciel stood his ground, not allowing the evil bastard’s threatening demeanor get to him. “Do you really expect him to get back together with you after you punched him in the face?”

Claude let out a roaring laugh, followed by a loud snort. “He’s already been in my bed since that little _incident_ —I don’t think he’s that bothered.”

Ciel blinked when his brain registered what Claude was claiming. The taller boy couldn’t be speaking the truth. Alois wouldn’t sleep with Claude again after what he had done, would he?

“What? You’re lying.”

“Are you jealous that he likes me more than you?” Claude smirked. “You have nothing on me. You’re just his little side toy before he comes crawling back to me like he always does.”

Ciel felt his composure beginning to fall apart the second Claude mentioned the one thing that had him truly anxious at the moment. What had him a little puzzled though, was the fact that all he could feel was rage towards the tall boy in front of him, but none towards Alois. What Claude had said couldn’t simply be true, there was no way. He was Ciel Phantomhive and he would never allow someone to use him as a toy.

The more he thought about it while his teeth began to grit and his fingers curled up into fists at his sides, the more he realized that Alois couldn’t have been playing some game with him. He definitely would have known it if he had. Ciel wanted to gouge the taunting fool’s eyes out for claiming such a thing, but he kept his position as heated words started to spew from his mouth beyond his control.

“Y-you’re a disgusting human being! Alois will never go back to you. He’s… he’s _mine_ ,” Ciel growled low from deep in his throat.

Claude’s glare immediately turned darker. “What did you say? I dare you to repeat that.”

“Well, hello there boys! What did I do to receive such a warm welcome at my doorstep?”

Both Ciel and Claude whirled around, searching for the owner of the voice. Alois stood partially hidden behind one of the corners, wearing long dark jeans and a plain white t-shirt, holding a jacket and a bag in his left hand. He stepped forward and half walked, half skipped towards the two boys with a barely noticeable sly little smile plastered on his face, making him look like he was up to something wicked.

“Well?” Alois asked after he made a halt in front of them.

“You called me,” Claude reminded him with an indifferent face.

“Right. I totally forgot about that,” the blonde murmured, raising one finger to press at his bottom lip as his gaze wandered off in thought. “Can we hang out tomorrow? Something’s come up,” he chirped, sounding like a kindergartener.

Claude narrowed his eyes as he looked down at Ciel. “You mean that brat came up.”

“Nooo, that’s not true at all. Now stop being so cranky and be glad I want to spend time with you at all,” Alois teased.

Claude gave him a faint snort. “I’m leaving tomorrow. It’s Christmas break, remember? Everybody’s leaving, even Timber.”

Both Ciel and Alois looked at each other as they both recalled something none of them had wasted much thought on. Since Ciel didn’t have any living relatives except for Sebastian, he had decided to stay at his dorm over the break. Finny was leaving to spend the break at his parent’s house; though he had agreed to have Christmas dinner and a gift exchange at Sebastian’s on Christmas day along with Ciel and Baldroy, since his family didn’t celebrate the holidays. 

“Umm, right,” Alois mumbled. “Sorry, Claude.”

The tall boy sighed and turned around while murmuring foul words to himself. Just as he was about to round the corner he looked back at the blonde and warned, “I’m only putting up with your little whims for so long, Alois.”

The blonde rolled his eyes and muttered, “Whatever, Claude,” before the older boy disappeared out of sight.

Ciel, who had been quiet the whole time Alois and Claude had been bickering, now took a step forward and asked, “Where have you been?”

The older boy sighed softly and turned to Ciel with tired eyes while a small smile found its way to his lips. “Let’s talk inside, okay?”

“Sure...”

Alois opened the door to his dorm and Timber glanced up from his notes, greeting the blonde with small nod. The purple-haired boy began parting his lips but when he saw that Ciel was following the blonde, he closed them again and returned to his intense studying.

“Sit,” Alois commanded, pointing to the bed before placing his own behind on the edge. Ciel did as he was told and sat down at the end, leaning his back against the wall.

“I’m sorry I just left without saying anything”, Alois started with a rueful sigh. “There was some minor trouble with the family, nothing you need to worry about.”

“You were with your family?”

“Yes, but it doesn’t matter. I’m back now and everything’s fine. And you’re here! I actually couldn’t be happier right now.”

Ciel looked at the blonde with a frown. “What? Why?”

“I missed you. Is it so hard to believe that I’m happy to see you?”

“No but… never mind,” Ciel mumbled and averted his gaze, ashamed over previously thinking that the blonde had played him.

“So… why did you come here? Couldn’t stay away?” Alois teased in a sultry voice, causing Ciel to purse his lips.

“I was just… I wanted to ask you if you wanted to come with me to Sebastian’s Christmas party,” he lied, determined not to ever reveal the real reason why he had been so eager to speak with the blonde. “But I’m sure you’ll be spending Christmas with your family, right?”

“No.” Alois seemed to ponder on his words and Ciel was certain he saw a flash of pain cross the blonde’s features for a short second before he continued. “My family is going to be out of town, they always travel over the holidays. I didn’t want to join them so I was just planning on staying here, not celebrating at all. Who’s coming? Do I have to bring gifts for everyone?”

“Why didn’t you want to go with your family?”

“I’m afraid of flying. Now answer me,” Alois demanded.

Ciel furrowed his brow at Alois’ eagerness to change the subject but he decided not to question the blonde further. “Okay… Baldroy and Finny are coming. We decided to have a little game this year. Everyone buys one gift worth about $15. Sebastian will write notes with our names on them and whoever’s name gets picked gets to choose one gift until everyone’s name has been drawn.”

“Sounds like fun!”

“So you’ll come?”

“How could I not? I know just the gift to buy,” the blonde snickered with mischief written all over him.

“Don’t buy anything too outrages, okay?” Ciel sighed, hiding his slight amusement with a frown.

“I won’t…” Alois halfheartedly assured him while losing himself in thought. Only a few seconds passed before he burst out, “CLAUDE! What were you two fighting about? I heard some of it you know.”

Ciel’s head tilted right up to meet the blonde with wide eyes. He wasn’t sure what answer he should give Alois and he had no way to gather his thoughts to come up with a good one because the mere mention of the tall boy’s name had anger seeping back into his veins.

“He tried to convince me that you two are still an item,” Ciel admitted in a strained voice while hiding his clenching fists between his legs, doing his best to keep his emotions in check.

“What? No no no, that’s not true. I told you—“

“He also mentioned that you two have been having…” The smaller boy swallowed. “…sex.” Ciel’s voice was composed but his tense frame showed off exactly what he felt about all of this.

Alois looked away; a red shade beginning to color his pale cheeks as fiddling fingers started picking away small specs of dust from his jeans. Ciel’s jaw dropped an inch, barely able to comprehend what was happening. He had been so _sure_ that Claude had been lying.

“What the—is it true? I mean… I have nothing to do with—I don’t really care.” Ciel stumbled over his words, abashed and bewildered over his own emotions and by the revelation he saw so clearly in the other’s face. “But why… how… he’s hurt you Alois. Why would you even want to be close to him? I’ve never asked you about it before because it’s really none of my business but—“

“I don’t know! I don’t know why! I’m sorry—please don’t hate me,” the blonde pleaded while lurching forward to clutch Ciel’s shirt. Alois’ desperation seeped through every pore on his slender body and the smaller boy almost wanted to push him away in pure defense. He had no clue how to handle a situation like this and the confusing thoughts and emotions circulating through his own body didn’t make it any easier.

“I don’t hate you,” were the words that finally slipped his tongue as his own fingers gentle pried Alois’ clingy fists open. Ciel looked at the other, trying to read his expression to figure out what to say next. Before he could gather any real information the blonde sank into a pile of somber limbs with a dismal sigh.

“I’m sorry,” Alois mumbled, folding his hands on his knees after he had released Ciel completely. “Claude… well… I do that sort of thing sometimes. Claude is… he’s always there, even if he’s a complete idiot. Haven’t you ever felt so lonely that just about anyone would suffice to keep you company?”

Ciel let the blonde’s words sink in, words he couldn’t begin to comprehend even if he wanted to. “No, no I haven’t,” he finally answered but he quickly followed up with, “But I can try to understand,” and he meant every word. Anger, frustration and maybe even jealousy coursed through his veins but the tired and gloomy eyes looking back at him made all of those emotions travel to the deepest end of his consciousness and stay there. Nothing else but the desire to take that look away from the other dominated in Ciel’s mind.

“Thank you,” Alois murmured and gently placed one of his hands on Ciel’s forearm.

“Just tell me one thing,” Ciel said as the events from earlier suddenly replayed in his mind. “Why did you call him today?”

“I… I needed… stuff… from him. But it doesn’t matter! I have you here now and that’s just as good. Better, actually. But wait…” Alois looked up with eyes beaming with excitement. “I heard you say that I’m yours.”

Ciel gaped. “No I didn’t! I mean… It didn’t mean—“

Alois broke out in laughter and threw his arms around the younger boy, who let out a yelp in surprise. “It’s okay. We don’t have to talk about that—but it’s nice to know that you feel that way about me.”

“I don’t feel—“ Ciel huffed in frustration against the other’s chest before being rudely cut off.

“Sshhh… don’t blow an artery,” Alois teased before releasing the smaller boy with a chuckle. “I won’t bring it up again, I promise.”

The older boy winked playfully and fell back on the bed, placing his hands behind his head on the pillow. His t-shirt had slid up, showing a small patch of skin and Ciel’s eyes immediately fell on that patch, because it wasn’t the blonde’s usual pale shade; it was flaming red and even a little blue at places.

“Alois… what happened to you?” Ciel asked worriedly, grabbing the hem of the garment as he leaned closer. Alois practically panicked and pushed Ciel away with enough force for him to slam against the wall with a loud thud.

“Oh my God, Ciel! I’m so sorry!” Alois cried while crawling the short distance between them on the small bed until he sat up beside Ciel’s slumped form resting against the wall. The blonde put one of his hands on the younger boy’s shoulder and shot him a sincerely apologetic look. “I didn’t mean to do that.”

Ciel raised his head while hoisting himself up into a sitting position. He straightened his already straight shirt and frowned at the older boy, silently wondering what could have happened that would coax such a reaction.

“It’s alright; no harm done,” Ciel mumbled with his brow furrowed.

Alois sighed and lowered his gaze to fixate on the fingers of his left hand that were currently fiddling with the hem of the white fabric covering his torso. “It just hurts, that’s all. Nothing horrific happened, don’t worry.”

“Can I see?” Ciel asked cautiously, not sure if he believed the blonde.

“Look, it’s not that bad,” Alois said and raised the t-shirt, showing off the fresh bruises. “I fell.”

“Okay… if you say so.”

“It’s true.”

“Yeah, sure. I believe you,” Ciel lied, but he wasn’t going to push Alois into telling him the real reason why he had those marks all over his front. There was a time and place for everything.

Alois had an unhappy air surrounding him and seemed to have trouble sitting still on the mattress, biting nervously on his nails while the other hand was twirling a lock of his messy hair. With determination to make him stop looking so damn uneasy, Ciel closed his fingers around Alois’ wrists and pulled the blonde’s arms down to his sides. A small shiver ran through the older boy at the gentle touch and to Ciel’s surprise his lips suddenly curled up into a malicious smirk.

“Well, if that’s cleared up, I would like to make up for these two days without being able to see you,” Alois purred huskily and grabbed hold of the collar of Ciel’s shirt. “Right _fucking_ now.”

Ciel gulped in shock as his mouth got invaded by that devilish tongue that he knew so well by now. With a firm shove to the other’s chest, Ciel broke the kiss, gasping for air.

“T-timber,” he stammered, looking over at the purple-haired boy who seemed to be lost in his books on the opposite side of the small room.

Alois’ high-pitched giggle filled the room and his eyes sparkled with mischief. “Let him watch,” he growled before jumping the utterly scandalized Ciel.

“N-no!” Ciel yelped, trying and failing to push Alois away from him.

The blonde leaned in close, whispering in a sultry tone. “Look, he’s not even facing this direction and he’s wearing headphones, he won’t even notice.”

Before Ciel could respond, Alois had both the younger boy’s wrists in a tight grip over his head with his body placed perfectly in the space between Ciel’s legs. The blonde reached back with his other hand and grabbed a blanket from the end of the bed, pulling it over them.

“Does this make you more comfortable?” Alois purred while he quickly slid his hand down Ciel’s chest until he reached the hem of the younger boy’s jeans.

“Alois, I’m serious! We can’t do this here!” Ciel hissed, aggravated and blushing fiercely.

Alois only chuckled faintly, pulling the buttons open one by one. When the blonde’s hand reached inside to cup Ciel’s member through his underwear, the younger boy surprised himself by letting out a small moan. Ciel wanted to keep protesting but he lost all of his words when the blonde began stroking him lewdly through the fabric. Eager fingers played over his slowly hardening length with great skill, teasing the tip by rubbing it in a soft, circling motion.

“Please… stop—ngh!” Ciel was quickly losing it. While his mind screamed out protest after protest, his body kept saying yes, yes, yes and he was no different than other teenagers—he was unwillingly a slave to his desires. He knew there was no use fighting the blonde; his skillful movements were clouding his mind almost instantly and instead of struggling, Ciel succumbed to lust.

Slowly forgetting all about the other person in the room, he let his eyes flutter shut as he titled his head back, letting out long, husky breaths. Alois’ lips found their way to his neck where they dusted the skin with light kisses before his tongue decided to come out and play, sending shivers up and down Ciel’s spine.

Alois finally reached inside the younger boy’s boxers and pulled out his cock, stroking him alluringly slow. Ciel whined and huffed, writhing like a snake on the sheets and he was slightly dazzled by the fact that the blonde managed to get him so thoroughly aroused with such simple touches.

Alois picked up some speed and as he pleasured Ciel, he nibbled at his earlobe and whispered obscene things in his ear, quickly turning the younger boy into a panting mess. Alois squeezed and caressed until Ciel’s breathing became ragged and his back arched just slightly, listening intensely at the faint whines slipping the other’s lips.

Ciel was struggling not to moan as he crept closer and closer to the edge with every tantalizing stroke of the blonde’s hand. He was thrusting into the fist pumping him, letting out hitched breaths as he felt himself getting closer and closer…

With a final faint whimper, Ciel spilled all over his stomach, breathing the blonde’s name as the pleasure slowly subsided and his body went completely limp. Alois finally released his wrists and sat up on his knees, still leaning over Ciel with his hands placed on each side of him.

“That wasn’t so bad was it?” the blonde teased with a smirk on his lips.

“No,” Ciel huffed before he raised his head and caught Alois’ lips in a tired, yet hungry kiss. The blonde responded eagerly, and as their hands began roaming, the blanket fell down, exposing them to whomever might be watching. To their surprise, Timber was gone, and Alois laughed in amusement.

“Guess he noticed.”

“Oh my god,” Ciel gasped with a mortified expression.

“You should be glad. That means we have the room all to ourselves,” the blonde purred, and Ciel had no time to respond before the older boy practically attacked him.

Ciel didn’t regret a thing by the time they were done.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My new Cielois fanfic "Domineering" is posted. Less romance, more... *cough* Hope you'll like it! *laugh*


	17. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! If you want to, you should really read the Finny/Bassy one shot that I just posted ;) Maybe even before you read the chapter. And thanks for your patience with me. I love you all.

The last few days had been… intense. Ciel was thankful that everyone he was close to at campus was at home with their families, otherwise he would have some serious explaining to do.

His dorm was a complete mess; dirty clothes were scattered everywhere, all of the pillows were on the floor (even Finny's), the sheets were in total disarray, and well… curled up in those sheets were Alois and Ciel, completely and utterly spent, from spending a great amount of their waking hours engaging in very lewd activities.

Ciel opened one tired eye, rubbing the other with his knuckle as he let out a tired little yawn. He glanced over at the sleeping form next to him and although he wanted to let Alois stay in the land of dreams a little bit longer, it was almost noon and they were supposed to be at Sebastian's for Christmas dinner in little more than one hour.

Ciel brushed some of the blonde strands from Alois' forehead and simply stared at his blissful face for a few moments before he whispered, "Alois, you need to wake up."

The blonde groaned sleepily and squeezed his already closed eyes shut even tighter, mumbling a faint, "No," before pulling the covers over his face.

"I'm going to take a shower, and if you keep sleeping you can't come with me," Ciel purred teasingly, hoping to coax a reaction from the other.

Not more than a few seconds passed before Alois practically flew out of the bed, standing proudly in the middle of the room. He didn't seem to be bothered in the least by the fact that he didn't have a thread on his body or that his privates were shamelessly hanging free while he stretched out his sore limbs.

Ciel's eyes went wide and he gasped before covering his face in his hands, a scarlet tint spreading over his fair skin with incredible speed.

Alois started laughing, seemingly very amused by Ciel's reaction. "It's not like you haven't seen it before," he mumbled before strolling over to grab two fluffy white towels from Ciel's closet. The blonde wrapped one of them around his waist and glanced over at the younger boy still hiding in his hands.

"Come on Ciel, we don't have all day."

Ciel finally removed his hands from his face, only to receive his towel in the most unkind of ways as it was thrown straight at his face and caused him to fall back against the mattress with a muffled squeal.

Alois was already halfway out the door when Ciel pulled the towel away and quickly sat up to cover himself with it. Grabbing his shower-caddie before exiting the room, Ciel stumbled after the blonde in the hallway, who glanced over his shoulder with the slightest hint of a smirk before he started jogging the last few steps and reached the doors leading to the showers.

Ciel sighed and went after the older boy, whose childish laughter echoed from within the room.

Alois was already standing under the warm spray of water when Ciel finally entered. He went over to one of the benches and removed his towel before walking across the already steamy room to join the blonde.

Ciel was met with the sight of the older boy's back; hot water was running in streams over his lean muscles, making them glisten beautifully as sparkling droplets fell from his perfectly curved backside and down onto the white tiles beneath his feet.

Alois' long, slim legs seemed like they would never end—that was undeniably what Ciel was most dazzled by as he watched the other. No matter how much he had tried denying it before, the truth was that he loved Alois' appearance, and the stunning pair of limbs belonging to the other male practically took Ciel's breath away.

The blonde ran his fingers through the soaked strands on his head and mindlessly began humming one of his favorite songs as the smaller boy watched him.

Ciel could barely take his eyes off of him, but he reminded himself that they had to hurry up if they were to arrive at Sebastian's in time for dinner, and hurriedly strolled over to the other boy, wrapping his arms around his waist.

"Is that a shampoo bottle, or are you just happy to see me?" Alois teased, glancing over his shoulder to look at Ciel with raised eyebrows.

The mortified boy looked down and caught sight of his partially erect member poking at the blonde's backside. Just as he was about to instinctively cover himself up, Alois reached behind himself to let the fingertips on both of his hands trail softly over Ciel's stiffening shaft.

The blonde bit down on his lower lip, humming in delight as Ciel involuntarily rolled his hips into the touch. Ciel quickly forgot all about being ashamed and let his hands travel over the older boy's chest to stroke the wet skin, petting blindly under the calming spray of hot water.

Alois' touch went from feather light to lovingly soft as he wrapped his slippery fingers around Ciel's cock, giving it a gentle squeeze before he began moving his hand up and down in slow movements. Ciel's eyes fluttered shut as he continued rolling his hips, pressing himself lightly against the blonde's supple behind with each small thrust.

Ciel rested his chin on Alois' shoulder, breathing raggedly against his flushed cheek. Lost in a blissful haze of arousal, he let his hands trail over the dips and curves of the blonde's front, cutting off the streams that traveled down his pale skin.

Ciel eventually reached Alois' narrow hips; he could hear the blonde's breath hitch as he got closer to the hardness waiting for him between his flawless legs. A soft whine left the smaller boy when his own cock twitched in Alois' teasing hand, making him even more eager to touch the blonde. Ciel almost shivered when he grasped Alois' heavy shaft and began to softly stroke him, eliciting a small moan from the other's lips.

Alois tilted his head back slightly and a little to the side, and on pure instinct, Ciel began delivering chaste kisses to his long neck. Whimpering, the blonde arched his back just slightly to rub his backside against Ciel's now rock-hard length and felt how his heart sped up in his chest.

The movement didn't go unnoticed by the younger boy, who started rocking his hips more eagerly while roughly biting down on the sensitive skin on the blonde's neck.

"Aahh! C-ciel… aren't we f-forgetting something?" Alois managed to blurt out, and in an instant, Ciel froze up as a jolt of panic went through him.

"Sebastian!" Ciel gasped as Alois turned around to face him.

"We'll continue this later. If we wash up quickly, we might be able to make it in time."

Ciel was achingly hard and by the looks of it, so was Alois—but he nodded in agreement; he didn't want to disappoint his older brother, who he knew had worked really hard to make a nice dinner for them, like he did every Christmas day.

They quickly lathered themselves up, washing away yesterday before they hurriedly got dressed and gathered their gifts for the exchange.

They managed to end up outside Sebastian's apartment building only fifteen minutes late.

The dinner was already on the table when they entered the spotless kitchen, and Finny and Baldroy greeted them both with wide smiles on their faces.

Alois sat down next to Baldroy, which meant that Ciel had to sit down next to Finny, across from the blonde. Sebastian was seated at the end, placing a napkin in his lap as he glanced over at Ciel with a reprimanding look. Muttering something inaudible, Ciel copied his actions and almost jumped in his chair when his brother suddenly opened his mouth.

"Merry Christmas everyone!" Sebastian chirped happily and waited until everyone around the table had finished repeating the same wishes until he continued. "I'm sure you're all pretty hungry; feel free to dig in."

Ciel helped himself to a large piece of turkey, some ham and fried potatoes. He was practically starving, not having eaten anything since yesterday afternoon, and he forgot all manners as he stuffed his mouth full of meat.

The blue haired boy wasn't that interested in listening to Baldroy going on about what he had blown up at his training, nor was he very excited in hearing what new pie recipes Sebastian had tried out for their dessert. Ciel hadn't even glanced up from his plate once, not before his strawberry-blonde friend narrowed his eyes at Alois across the table.

"Is that a hickey on your neck?" Finny asked curiously.

Alois raised his eyebrows in surprise and started searching his neck blindly with one of his hands. "Where?"

"There," Finny replied, pointing at the place where Ciel had bitten Alois earlier in the shower. It was barely any mark there, but it was apparently enough to spike Finny's interest.

"Huh. I had no idea that I had it," Alois admitted. "Is it pretty?" He tilted his head to the side with a dumb smile.

"Yes, Alois. It's very pretty," Sebastian sighed, "You're an adult now, you should tell your boyfriends to stop marking you up like some love-struck sixteen year old."

"Stop being such a stick in the mud, Sebby," the blonde grinned but quickly added, "But I'll be sure to tell them," while shooting a barely noticeable smirk in Ciel's direction.

Ciel used all of his mental strength to try and command his body not to make him blush. Small fists clenched as he gritted his teeth and tried not to listen in on the conversation.

_Act aloof, stay calm._

He wasn't ready for anyone to know about him and Alois yet. Ciel didn't even know what they were; friends with benefits? Dating? He had no idea how he would even tell anyone anything, all Ciel knew was that he might have to figure it all out very quickly if he didn't manage to keep his emotions in check around the blonde.

Thankfully, Baldroy saved the day by going on about some boring movie he just remembered he had watched last week. Ciel let out a small sigh and took a piece of bread from the basket to chew on.

Just when he thought he was in the clear, Ciel felt something soft brush up against the inside of his thigh. His eyes went wide in an instant and he did his best to seem unaffected.

A cotton-clad foot slowly rode up his leg, until it was mere inches from Ciel's crotch. He shot a murderous glare at Alois—it was all he dared to do. If he was to try and remove the foot, or signal the blonde to stop in any other way, someone would surely notice.

After checking so that no one was watching, Alois caught his lower lip between his teeth in a seductive manner before continuing his torture of the younger boy in front of him.

The blonde painted small circles with his big toe over the sensitive skin, and there was no way Ciel could hold back his blush this time. He tried closing his legs, but Alois used his other foot to keep them parted.

Ciel looked around nervously, and to his great relief no one was facing his direction at the moment. He kept chewing frantically at the piece of bread in his hand and sweat began to pouring out over his body as Alois' vicious toes crept closer to the bulge between his legs.

Their eye-contact broke when Finny demanded Alois' attention and began chit-chatting happily about meaningless things, trying to get the older boy to reveal what he had bought for the gift exchange.

Alois kept conversing with Finny as if nothing out of the ordinary was going on, and meanwhile, Ciel was thinking about different ways to stop what the blonde was doing without drawing attention to what was happening under the table.

When the side of the blonde's foot brushed up against one of his most secret of places, Ciel's breath hitched and he was unable to keep himself from squirming a little on the edge of the chair.

Alois used the pad of his foot to rub gentle circles, and Ciel immediately felt all of the blood in his body rush south. Having their morning playtime cut short, he was a little on edge already and it seemed like even the slightest of touches had a major effect on him.

Ciel was starting to panic, and his brain was telling him to do something; he was thinking about running away or kicking Alois, but… it felt so good. The tablecloth would surely hide what they were doing, right?

Ciel couldn't help but getting oddly excited by the fact that they were doing something so lewd in such close proximity to his friends and family. When he realized that he, Ciel Phantomhive, was thinking such indecent thoughts, the blush returned with fierce intensity but he still managed to keep a straight face.

The blonde stroked up and down over his hardening length with just the perfect amount of pressure and Ciel could actually hear his own rapid heartbeat in his ears. He wanted to moan, he wanted to close his eyes—he wanted to touch.

Carefully, he reached under the tablecloth in a way that no one would notice, and began stroking the top of Alois' foot. He rode higher, to where the sock ended and the soft skin of the blonde's calf began, trailing his fingers gently over the area.

He could see a small smile form on the blonde's lips, but Alois kept his composure as he continued his mindless chit-chat with Finny. Ciel had no idea how Alois had managed to maintain a normal conversation this whole time; he would never have been able to do it.

"You're awfully quiet today, Ciel. Is something wrong? Your face is a little red," Baldroy suddenly asked him, and Ciel jumped in his chair, causing Alois' heel to press down slightly on his straining erection. He yelped at the surprise question and the sudden rush of pleasure, but quickly composed himself as he faced the trainee soldier with all the confidence he could muster.

"It's nothing. I'm just a little tired; I didn't get much sleep," Ciel answered in a slightly choked voice, not exactly lying, but not telling the entire truth either.

With the faintest smirk, Alois slowly lowered his foot to the floor and left Ciel with a painful hard-on for the second time that day.

"Alois, you shouldn't keep my brother up all night, he needs his beauty sleep," Sebastian teased, carrying one pie in each hand. "It's time for dessert."

Ciel nearly fell over in his chair. "W-what? H-he doesn't!" he squealed, but Sebastian only kept looking at him with a playful expression as he set the two desserts down on the table. Ciel hadn't even noticed that the table had been cleared to make room for the last dish; his mind had been somewhere else completely.

Their small group finished the pies, seemingly enjoying themselves immensely while Ciel couldn't stop squirming in his chair. Thankfully, the others were so busy engaging in everyday conversations that they didn't seem to notice. But Alois noticed of course, smiling smugly to himself every time Ciel shifted in his seat, and it made Ciel want to punch him in the face.

Ciel slowly started to form a plan, in which he would make the blonde just as frustrated as himself— two could play this game. With that thought, Ciel pulled out his phone and began typing.

 **Ciel:**  
_I'm going to push you down on the bed..._

When Ciel saw Alois read the text and his reaction, the corner of Ciel's lips curved upwards. That sex-crazed idiot would surely be affected even by something so small; Ciel was sure of it. He began coming up with the next one when Sebastian suddenly rose to his feet.

"Should we exchange the gifts now, perhaps?" The raven haired male didn't wait for anyone to answer before he went over to the small pile of gifts to retrieve them. He placed the five gifts on the table and Ciel noticed how everyone's eyes fell on the small box wrapped in sparkling pink paper.

"That's from you, isn't it Alois?" Finny chuckled, curiosity beaming from his turquoise eyes.

"Yes!" Alois answered proudly. "Whoever gets it has to use it immediately," he continued with mischief written all over him.

Ciel had no idea what Alois had bought, but he knew it couldn't be anything good. Wanting to wipe that grin of the blonde's face, he once again started typing on his phone.

 **Ciel:**  
_I'm going to nibble on your earlobe..._

He smirked to himself when he succeeded; the look on Alois' face was pure gold. The blonde's eyes widened a tiny bit and he bit down on his lower lip, but quickly composed himself when Sebastian pulled out the small leather purse containing the pieces of paper with their names. Pushing his lean fingers inside to grab one of the notes, Sebastian smiled at the excited eyes locked on him around the table.

"The first to pick a gift is… Finnian."

"I want the biggest one! Who bought this?"

"I did." Sebastian smiled in delight over Finny's enthusiasm while he un-wrapped the gift.

"Socks… a lot of socks… and mittens… thanks…" Finny muttered with a dissatisfied frown.

Alois grinned teasingly. "At least you won't get cold."

Sebastian _almost_ pouted as he murmured, "We said the gifts could be anything, right? Who doesn't need socks?"

"God, you're so boring Sebastian," Alois mocked after letting out a sigh.

The raven-haired male ignored the blonde as he dug through the purse. "Next person to pick is…" he said as he pulled out another piece of paper, "Ciel."

"I won't pick your gift, that's for sure…" Ciel asserted, glancing over at Alois before he grabbed a small box in green wrapping-paper and eagerly ripped it open. "Chocolate!"

"Fits you. Next one is… Alois."

Alois picked one of the gifts and Baldroy got a wide grin on his face. "I'm guessing this is from you," the blonde said with raised eyebrows at the trainee soldier while he was un-wrapping the gift. He pulled out next year's calendar, filled with pictures of naked women. "Oh wow, this fits me so very well. Thanks corporal."

Alois burst out in laughter and so did the rest of them. All except Ciel, who was still dead set on making the blonde flustered and therefore sent another text under the table.

 **Ciel:**  
_I'm going to rip your clothes off..._

Alois got trouble focusing after that and Ciel smiled to himself, quite satisfied with the blonde's reaction.

Sebastian pulled out another note and sighed deeply. "Baldroy…"

The ragged male let out a roaring laugh and extended his arm, letting his hand hover over the last two gifts. "Which one should I pick… shall I torture my best friend, or subject myself to whatever is in that pink box?" Baldroy pondered for a few moments while Sebastian glared at him through narrow eyes. "Sorry, Sebastian," he finally said before picking Ciel's gift.

Sebastian growled lowly between his teeth as he snatched the small box that was left on the table. Baldroy un-wrapped the boring mystery novel Ciel had bought, but he seemed to be satisfied with it.

"Thank you Ciel, I really need something new to read back at the barracks."

Alois grinned across the table when the raven haired male began uncovering his gift. With a deep sigh, Sebastian pulled out a very small, black thong from the box. He let them hang from the tip of his index finger as he met Alois' humored gaze with a frown.

"I am obviously not going to wear these, but…" Sebastian started and trailed off for a bit before continuing. "…they just might look good on someone else. I think I'll keep them." A small smirk was tugging at his lips and everyone was surprised by his reaction—especially Finny, who was blushing madly.

The flushed boy and the tall male shared an inconspicuous look and not many seconds passed before Finny suddenly blurted out, "I need to go to the bathroom!" loud enough for everyone to turn their heads in his direction. With one hurried movement, Finny tumbled out of his chair just as a furry little creature jumped up on the table.

"Well hello there, princess. Wouldn't you like to see someone wear these around the apartment?" Sebastian teased as he stroked the multicolored fur of the purring cat, glancing over at the strawberry blonde rushing towards the bathroom. A most wicked smile was curving the sides of Sebastian's lips as he turned his head to once again face the group. "Anyway, Ciel and Alois, would you two mind fetching the board games from the bedroom?"

"Uhm... okay," Ciel replied a little uncertain, but he didn't hesitate before he rose to his feet along with a very eager Alois.

"God yes, I want to see his love dungeon!" the blonde chirped excitedly as he quickly made his way to the bedroom with Ciel tagging along behind him.

"Man... red walls," Alois murmured as he looked around the room with big eyes. "That's kinky. I bet he has a drawer somewhere full of whips and buttplugs."

Ciel gasped. "Buttplugs?!"

"Yeah, why not? You heard him—he likes to get fruity... just. like. you." Alois gave Ciel the most alluring look before he went over to him to wrap his arms around his waist. "I'm really starting to like your brother... letting us get some alone time and all..."

"What do you m—" was all Ciel managed to blurt out before the blonde caught his lips in a voracious kiss, letting his tongue play with the tip of Ciel's own.

With sexual frustration currently being the dominating emotion in the smaller boy, he let himself get completely engaged in the kiss and quickly forgot all about his surroundings as he tangled his fingers in the other's soft locks. It was Alois that finally had to pull away to allow them both to catch their breaths. Then he whispered playfully, "You're actually kissing me back while your friends and family are right outside... are you that horny, Ciel?"

"Alois! I'm not—"

"Shush."

"I'm not horny..." Ciel snarled in a low voice, getting thoroughly flushed when Alois' words sank in. Sebastian, Finny and Baldroy was indeed on the other side of the door and he had just let himself get kissed as if there was no one there who could walk in on them at any moment. _Fuck... what's wrong with me?_

"Sure... whatever you say," the blonde teased as he winked at Ciel, "But I am… and I can't wait to get out of here... those things you tex—"

"Boys, are you coming back any time soon?" Sebastian called out from the kitchen and Ciel actually started to panic now, cursing between his teeth over his own stupidity.

The blonde only smirked as he, despite the other's frown, reached between Ciel's legs to squeeze his cock through his jeans. "I need this... let's come up with an excuse—I'll die if I have to wait any longer..."

"Hngh..." Ciel took a deep breath, trying yet failing to calm himself down because all the lies in world couldn't keep his body from telling him exactly what it wanted. "Dammit... yes. Let's get the fuck out of here."


	18. Chapter 18

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you sweethearts for your comments and patience. I truly apologize for the wait but I hope this chapter will make up for it. Enjoy~

The Christmas party had ended for Ciel and Alois the moment the two had exited Sebastian's bedroom. As planned, they had come up with a lame excuse and hurried out of there, hopping on the first bus to get back to campus. On their way home they had done nothing but stare at each other because public affection was something that Ciel still refused. Their looks had been sultry and eager, the silence between them speaking the most lewd of words because they both knew what was going to happen once they were behind closed doors.

Ciel had been forced to realize that the blonde—the annoying and extremely attractive _male_ —sitting opposite to him was exactly what he had wanted without having a clue. Because Ciel couldn’t be more pleased with his current situation; he was having fun for real which was something he hadn’t experienced in a long time.

Alois was like poison to Ciel; a good, good poison that had him thinking the most unseemly of thoughts and made him engage in activities so unlike him that he was beginning to doubt who he really was. Alois was also the cure to these insecurities because he made Ciel smile and laugh – he made him feel alive.

A week had passed so quickly since that first night, yet it felt like months. Had anyone asked Ciel what he did before he went to Alois’ dorm and kissed him, he would barely remember, because he was completely caught up in spending every waking moment with the blonde. They were so consumed by one another that it almost felt unhealthy.

But it wasn’t unhealthy.

It was fucking great.

* * *

They barely got inside Alois' dorm before the blonde jumped Ciel, pushing him up against the wooden door hard enough for the hinges to whine. Lips instantly connected, getting pushed together in a feverish kiss, slippery tongues rolling and lapping like they couldn’t get enough of each other.  
  
Between tasting and panting there were moans almost bordering on whimpers and the combination of it all made Alois go wild in his mind. But before he could act on his urges to brutishly tear his way to Ciel’s hot skin, the younger male beat him to it.  
  
Ciel felt like he was about to explode from all the built up frustration and he ripped Alois’ shirt open, causing buttons to fly every which way. The blonde’s first reaction was to gasp in a breath but then he growled against Ciel's lips and began clawing at his belt, avid digits fumbling with the buckle.  
  
A pallid chest was fondled as Ciel attacked the skin with sloppy kisses, sucking and nipping like it was the best thing he could imagine. The blonde was distracted from his chore of stripping Ciel, and paused to tilt his head to the side as the lips on him worked their way up to his neck.  
  
"Ahh shit just... god," Alois breathed as Ciel's hands, much more confident now, groped both his ass and his dick through his pants. Ciel was all over the place and the blonde reveled in the way the smaller male acted almost as if he wanted to devour him. It made him go crazy and he almost tore Ciel's jeans open because he needed to feel that stiff ridge against his palm that instant.  
  
When Alois finally managed to get the belt and buttons open, he grabbed the hem of the garments covering Ciel’s nether regions and yanked them down, finally letting Ciel's rigid cock meet the air.  
  
“You’re such a naughty boy, Ciel, sending me those texts... I honestly didn’t think you had it in you,” Alois purred into his ear in a teasing tone, pushing his own clothed erection against Ciel’s exposed one, eliciting another pleasured sound from the younger male.  
  
"Sh-shut up... just get on with it, I'm dying."  
  
A loud moan was exhaled, fleeing parted lips as Alois wrapped his fingers around Ciel's shaft and started stroking him, playing with his hard flesh like he wanted nothing else. Ciel was horrified by his own desperation, raising a pale hand to cover his mouth but it was soon slapped away by a slightly larger one.  
  
"I want to hear you."  
  
"But—"  
  
"No buts. You want me to lick you? Then I want to hear you moan my name..." the blonde whispered before he dragged his wet muscle over a hot neck, Ciel's clenched eyes and panting breaths like the perfect display of sexual frustration.  
  
Fumbling fingers latched onto smooth skin as Ciel tried to get the blonde even closer in some way of coping with what he was feeling. He was moving his narrow hips into that teasing fist that he knew would keep torturing him until he finally complied.  
  
"I... ah..."  
  
"You should know by now that there's no way around this... Do. As. I. Say." Alois gave the flesh in his hand a rough squeeze, using his thumb to roll over the slit and smear the clear fluid over the reddened tip. He listened to the other male, just waiting for the words he knew he'd hear any second now because Ciel was too far gone to hold on to his stubbornness.  
  
"F-fuck y—aah A-Alois, nghh!"  
  
"That's right... tell me how much you want it... Do you want me to use _this_ ," the blonde breathed over a fine jawline before he traced the raised skin with a wicked tongue, letting a small moan slip past his lips just to tease Ciel further, "to make you come? You want me to suck on your _hard_ cock until you let it all out?"  
  
"I... nn. I hate you."  
  
"No you don't. What do you want me to do? Tell me," the blonde demanded as he played with his fingertips over the strained skin of Ciel's dick, smirking in satisfaction at the low growl that thrummed in the male's throat.  
  
"Suck me," Ciel snapped, not at all in the mood for amusing the blonde by refusing to obey his commands.  
  
"That wasn't so hard, was it?" Alois let out a soft chuckle before he dropped to his knees, removing both shoes and pants from around Ciel’s feet, leaving him completely bare from the waist down. A fine dick was right in front the blonde, as hard and ready as they come. The thing looked far too delicious and Ciel was far too frustrated for Alois to keep teasing him, and therefore clutched the base of the shaft to keep the flesh steady as he took almost the entire length into his mouth.  
  
"Oh god—ah!" Ciel’s eyes shot open and a loud cry escaped his lips; his hands were suddenly all over the place, trying to find something to hold on to. They eventually ended up in both Alois' hair and on his shoulder and the blonde couldn't keep himself from smiling around the thick thing in his mouth. He just loved how crazy he could drive Ciel.  
  
The fingers clutching Ciel's shaft clenched and moved up and down as the tip of his dick was sucked and licked. Ciel gasped in every breath, almost coming just by looking at the flawless male devouring him with eager.  
  
Alois dragged his tongue along the strained skin as he moved his free hand to stroke one of Ciel's supple cheeks, giving it a light squeeze before it crept lower to rest on the back of the male's thigh. With sultry eyes locked on a face twisted in pleasure, the blonde gave the muscle a push, motioning for Ciel to lift his leg.  
  
Ciel was slightly confused by the request, but he wasn’t about to question it, not when he knew that Alois might stop what he was doing if he did. The blonde’s swirling tongue and soft lips felt too good on him to even consider pondering on the matter.  
  
A small foot was raised from the floor and a humming Alois guided Ciel to rest his leg on his shoulder. The blonde slowed down his pace, sucking agonizingly slow as his hand found its way to Ciel's backside once again. He was lapping at the reddened slit, rolling his slick muscle over the soft curve of the tip, enjoying every second he spent with his mouth on Ciel's hard dick.  
  
"Don't fucking... stop..." Ciel whined, bucking his hips and shoving his cock deep down the blonde's throat in an attempt to make the male go faster. The action only resulted in Alois holding Ciel's hips in place against the door as he moved away from his length with a malicious grin plastered on his face.  
  
"But I've only just started. It'd be a shame to end the fun too soon, don't you think?"

Ciel groaned at that and shuddered at the sudden sensation of fingernails grazing over the sensitive skin of his ass. As if that wasn’t enough to make him whine, a flat tongue dragged over his swollen tip, the sensation almost driving him completely insane.

“Mmnn, Alois…" Ciel huffed in desperation. If Alois didn’t stop teasing him soon, he was sure he would scream out loud.  
  
A hiss came from Ciel as the blonde wrapped his lips around him again, relaxing his jaw and swallowing him down with ease. After a few bobs of his head and a sudden harsh suck Alois brushed a soft fingertip over the hidden place between the younger male’s cheeks and he jumped in surprise.

“A-alo… wha…” Ciel tried to get out coherent words but if was nearly impossible. It felt too strange and Ciel was far too lost in a haze of pleasure and arousal.  
  
The blonde looked up at the struggling boy and let his dick fall from his mouth, sneering with a mischievous smile, “Just shut up and relax, you wimp.”  
  
Ciel tried to object, but no words came out. The only sound he could manage was a choked whine when Alois began moving his thin digit, rubbing circles over his tiny hole.  
  
“You know... I’ve been going easy on you this past week since you're new to this and all… but trust me, I will do things to you that you've never even dreamed of,” the blonde assured Ciel, every word dripping with raw lust.  
  
“Do… do it,” Ciel said and clenched his eyes shut as he complied, so desperate for release that he would do practically anything the blonde asked for in order to get what he needed. And it actually didn't feel that bad.  
  
Satisfied with Ciel’s consent, Alois turned his attention back to his achingly hard cock, grasping the rigid base as he blew a hot breath over the leaking head. Pink lips squeezed over strained skin as the blonde took the thing in his mouth, gliding over the shaft until his nose nudged a soft belly. Alois smiled when Ciel's legs tensed as he worked his finger over his puckered skin, slowly pulling his mouth away until only the tip remained between his lips.  
  
Ciel let out a mix between a whimper and a groan, tilting his head back with his mouth agape as Alois suddenly pushed past his tight opening and slid his digit inside of him. Mismatched eyes shot open and a shaky breath was released as Ciel did his best to accept and get used to the new sensation.

The odd feeling of being filled coupled with the glorious tongue rolling over his length had Ciel completely dazed. His body and mind were struggling with how he was supposed to react to the intrusion, when it suddenly started to feel different.  
  
Ciel took several deep breaths as Alois pushed his finger against his inner walls, stimulating him with long strokes as the digit slid in and out. Small yet powerful rushes of pleasure had him contracting the muscles around the finger and he had trouble grasping the fact that it actually felt as good as it did.

A narrow chest was heaving as Ciel panted and small hands flew up to cover his mouth after he squealed because the blonde rolled his tongue just right. "Hnghh Alois... it feels... ah, fuck."  
  
Listening to Ciel’s moans had Alois’ dick twitching inside its prison of cloth and he nearly whimpered when he looked up, watching the other’s blissful frown and cheeks dusted with pink. In the next second the blonde was pleased to feel how Ciel’s tense muscles began to relax and took the opportunity to venture deeper, dead set on having the younger boy wheezing and screaming. He went very slowly with his mouth as he searched around inside of Ciel, trying to find all his most pleasurable places. This was going to be fun.  
  
Just as Ciel had begun accepting the lewd treatment, Alois brushed against something inside him that made him cry out and fall forward. The feeling was intense, and Ciel, being a well-educated man, had an inkling of what the blonde was pressing against. Two set of orbs met as the younger whined in pleasure, his digits seizing light strands in a tight grip. Alois smiled around Ciel’s cock, bobbing his head a little faster and just as the smaller male started pulling himself together, the blonde pushed his finger against that spot again.  
  
"H-hahh!” Ciel moaned, his cock pulsing as he climaxed without warning, surprising both himself and Alois. Sky blue eyes went wide as the blonde’s throat was fed with thick, warm liquid and he choked, pulling away both his mouth and hand to cough and swallow.  
  
“W-wow… I didn’t know that y-you’d like it that much. I’ll have to remember that.” Alois was smirking as he rose to his feet, putting his arms around Ciel, who looked like he had just seen a ghost.  
  
“I… I don’t know what to say.” A blush rose to the younger’s face, painting his cheeks in a distinct crimson.

“You don’t have to say anything. What you have to do now is to take your shirt off and get on the bed. I’m not done with you.”  
  
"I might need a minute."  
  
"You sure about that?" Alois purred, taking Ciel's length in a firm grip and giving it a quick stroke.  
  
"Uh!" Ciel was forced to lower his gaze to watch the blonde's fingers squeeze his half hard shaft. "Maybe not."  
  
Alois licked his lips. "It's very flattering... how you can stay this hard. Did that girlfriend of yours ever manage to get you this excited?" he asked as he gave Ciel another slow pump.  
  
Ciel flinched from the sensitivity in his cock, but he didn't dislike the feeling. "Ah, no."  
  
Alois smiled as he studied Ciel's expression, loving the sight of his heavily lidded eyes and that tempting mouth hanging open to let out slow, deep breaths.  
  
"I take it you like what I do to you then?" the blonde whispered, his smooth palm massaging the hot flesh as he stared at the younger male.  
  
"Mnn yes." The air between them was sultry, their foreheads pressed together as they breathed in and out in the same rhythm. Ciel clenched his eyes shut, chewing on his lip to keep himself from moaning only to whine a second later when Alois' hand left him.  
  
"H-huh, don't—"  
  
"Don't stop? I'm not giving you a hand job. Get on the bed," Alois commanded and took a step back to allow Ciel to pass.  
  
"Ah... yeah, okay," Ciel mumbled, his mind somewhat muddled as he pulled his shirt over his head and did as he was told. The springs creaked as he crawled over the covers and laid down on top of the soft cotton, propping himself up on his elbows. Ciel was hard again and excited, and he became even more so when Alois gave him one of his common, mischievous grins.  
  
"What now?" Ciel asked, wetting his lips as his narrow ribcage rose and sank as he waited.  
  
Keeping eye contact with the other male, Alois let his shirt slowly fall over his shoulders and down onto the floor. Ciel couldn't explain why, but watching the blonde doing even something as simple as that, made every bone in his body go weak.  
  
Alois didn't answer Ciel; instead he brought his hands up to the top of his pants, tracing the hem with the pads of his thumbs. A swollen lip was caught between teeth as the blonde smirked, popping the single button open and slowly pulling the zipper down.  
  
Ciel could do nothing but stare, mouth open and chest heaving as he took in breath after breath, getting more aroused by the second. A single elbow had to hold the weight of Ciel's torso as his other arm automatically lifted to bring his hand to his flat belly. His digits slid lower, over smooth skin and trimmed hairs to finally end up right next to the hardness between his legs. The blonde was fucking him with his eyes and as he let his pants drop and revealed his tight pink briefs, Ciel grasped his cock and shuddered.  
  
The sides of Alois' lips curved into a satisfied smile as one eager finger traced the shape of his impossibly hard length through the thin fabric.  
  
"See something you like, big boy?"  
  
"Get over here," Ciel breathed, instinctively stroking himself, letting his fist slowly glide up and down his stiff shaft.  
  
Alois smiled, clutching his dick through his underwear and rubbing it with his palm as he sauntered over to the end of the bed. Icy blue eyes glossed over with lust never left Ciel as the blonde pulled the last garment over his hips. He did it slowly, savoring the lewd look he was given as his cock came into view one inch at a time.  
  
Just as Alois let the tiny piece of fabric fall to the floor, Ciel sat up, staring without shame at the naked blonde. Alois responded by hopping onto the bed, speedily ending up on top of the smaller male, straddling his lean waist as he practically attacked his mouth with his own.  
  
Ciel let out a yelp but soon melted into the kiss, dropping his jaw to meet the blonde's tongue. His hands stopped everything they were doing to grip Alois' nape and tangle in his shiny locks.  
  
Their breaths were swift and hot as the smacking sound of lips against lips filled the room. The blonde had pretty good self-control, but he had almost reached his limit by now and he especially went crazy the moment Ciel's naked body was pressed flush against his as he leaned down.  
  
"Nngh I need... I need your cock," Alois moaned, sounding a little too needy for his own liking and pursed his lips as a result.  
  
Slender wrists were seized in a firm grip as the blonde ripped Ciel's hands away from him, squeezing skin and bone with slim fingers. Ciel didn't question Alois because he being rough was something he'd gotten used to by now - and he liked it.  
  
Ciel's arms were raised over his head, the pliant limbs being held in place by strong hands. Both of them were panting, one of them whining because the blonde rolled his ass right over Ciel's rigid length.  
  
"Alo—h-hngh."  
  
"Fuck you're hot like this," Alois breathed, removing one hand from Ciel to reach for the nightstand, blindly going through the drawer to wrap eager digits around soft fabric, retrieving two black scarves. Skilled hips rocked again, eliciting another agonized mewl from Ciel and the blonde was unable to stop now – it was impossible to be still.  
  
Partially lidded orbs were stuck on Ciel as the blonde stole his air, panting over gasping lips. Alois could by no means stay away from the smaller male's open mouth, ravenously nipping and playing with Ciel's tongue because he wanted all of him at once. It was too much and too little at the same time but despite the emotional confusion the blonde just kept on kissing the other male. Alois could barely keep himself from going wild; he wanted to abandon all self-restraint and just claw and tear like a feral animal.  
  
"I need you," Ciel exhaled as their lips disconnected, shivering when Alois' teeth grazed over his jaw. A husky moan emitted from the smaller male as the blonde bit the creamy skin of a fine neck, Ciel's back arching from the pained pleasure. "Aah!"  
  
"I... I can't get enough of y-you," Alois huffed against the reddened skin as he spun one of the scarves around Ciel's wrists, tying the fabric to the headboard in a tight knot.  
  
Ciel opened his eyes, studying the blonde as he worked. "You keep things like that in your nightstand... is this something you do often?" He met Alois' amused gaze, his brows bunching together for a split second only to be raised in shock a moment later. Purple and blue globes were hidden, covered by the second scarf, and Ciel had no time to find any words before the blonde chuckled.  
  
"Yes. I'm a bondage pro'," Alois joked in a low and seductive voice, skillfully wrapping the cloth around Ciel's head and tying it in place right above his pierced ear.  
  
Skin rubbed against skin as Alois' ass rolled over Ciel's crotch, free hands moving along a sensitive waist. Teasing lips brushed over a heaving chest, kissing hard nipples before a sleek muscle traced the enticing rack of ribs. Ciel was gasping at every touch, too caught up in the sensation of being explored by a hungry mouth to form any thoughts.  
  
Thin wrists were already flushed because Ciel kept jerking, barely keeping still as Alois bit and licked his flesh. Had it been someone else tying him up like this, Ciel might have complained, but for some reason the blonde always made him react in unforeseen ways.  
  
"I want you to come inside me..." Alois whispered, lips hovering right over Ciel's hammering heart.  
  
The hard ridge between the smaller male's legs twitched against smooth cheeks as those lecherous words reached his ears. "A-ah I want to... are you sure?”

“Yes.”

“I can't stand this much longer."  
  
"Me neither." The blonde raised his torso, sitting up straight as he hurriedly fumbled for the lube in the drawer. There was no time to spare and Alois scooched back a few inches for Ciel's dick to pop up between his legs. But before he'd even gotten the lid of the bottle open he had to take a moment and just stare.  
  
Alois could hardly comprehend the beauty of the male underneath him; dark hair fanned out over the pillow, swollen lips parted and red, the svelte form bound and blindfolded arousing enough to make the blonde grasp his own length.  
  
A light squeeze was delivered to his corpulent flesh as Alois flicked the cap open and pressed down on the bottle, trickling the slippery liquid all over Ciel's aching shaft. A hiss followed the blonde's actions as the other male was shocked by the cold substance that met his hot skin.  
  
Alois was longing for Ciel with every inch of his body, unable to think about anything else than how much he wanted to pleasure him. Skilled hands glided through the slick fluid, massaging Ciel's cock as the blonde made sure the entire thing was coated in the liquid.  
  
"H-hahh A-Alois..."  
  
Busy fists pumped both their erections, the two males moaning and breathing heavily as they rocked in sync with one another. Not many seconds passed before the blonde slipped his digits from his dripping length to ready his trembling form for what he craved so bad.  
  
Every ounce of self-control was lost and Alois simply raised himself on his knees, guiding Ciel's dick to slide between round globes and rub against his hole. A flat palm slapped down on Ciel's chest as the blonde steadied himself, nearly losing it when the other male tugged on his restraints and whined.  
  
Teeth clenched as Alois lowered himself, letting the wet tip push past his entrance; no stretching to make it slide in easier. It hurt like hell, but he was too impatient to prepare himself properly.

"Ciel, fuck... fuck."  
  
"Ugh... tight," the younger gasped out, doing his utmost to keep himself from bucking his hips and shove himself deeper into that unbelievable smoothness.  
  
The blonde was experienced, he knew how to relax, and he was seated on Ciel's cock in no time at all. One shaky exhale later, Alois' lips formed a wicked grin, all too eager to make the other male suffer. Narrow hips moved, letting the wet length slowly slip out again as the blonde leaned down, pressing their torsos together to feed Ciel's ear a set of salacious words.  
  
"You're not allowed to make any sounds..." The blonde ended his command with a playful lick to the lobe as he reached behind himself to clutch Ciel's slick shaft and once again position it against his hole. He let the head roll over the puckered skin, moaning out a breath, and then rocked back and swallowed the reddened tip with his ass. "If you moan or move I'll stop. Is that understood?"  
  
"Aah but—"  
  
"Is. That. Understood?" the blonde repeated, gliding back and forth over Ciel's chest, letting the smooth head slip in and out in a means to tease.  
  
"Mmnn, y-yes." Ciel spread his legs behind Alois, his knees tipping to the sides and he was just about ready to defy him, to jerk upwards and fill him again. But he never got the chance to as the blonde sat up and placed both hands on a rising ribcage, sitting his ass down and engulfing Ciel's stiff cock completely.  
  
"Mmm Ciel..." Lascivious eyes were covered as eyelids fluttered shut, Alois' mouth falling open in a throaty moan when he rolled his hips. The male moved smoothly, taking a puffy lip between his teeth to chew on.  
  
Ciel was huffing, yanking on the fabric holding his wrists in place whenever the blonde would clench his walls around him. Teeth were gritting, eyes squeezed shut under the blindfold as he fought the urge to verbally express the pleasure he was experiencing. Alois knew what he was doing, almost driving Ciel mad with how slowly he was impaling himself on his cock.  
  
Moans filled the room but they weren't coming from Ciel; the blonde was so caught up in what he was doing and it felt too incredibly good. He wanted to grab his own cock and pump himself but he knew he would come too fast if he did. Instead, he increased his speed, bouncing up and down as he lost himself in the sensation of being filled by the most beautiful male he'd ever seen.  
  
"Hnngh—ah!" Ciel couldn't keep quiet, Alois was working him too well, and he nearly tore the fabric apart because he was going crazy not being able to touch.  
  
Even if Alois wanted to keep going, teasing Ciel was too fun to pass up. The blonde stopped moving almost instantly, letting Ciel's length push all the way in as he settled down over his pelvis, keeping him from thrusting into him.  
  
"What did I tell you? No sounds," Alois reprimanded as he leaned forward, smirking to provoke even though Ciel couldn't see him.  
  
"But Alois—"  
  
"Shush. Don't move or I'll get off and leave you here."  
  
Ciel was about to throw a curse at the blonde when he ground his ass into his hips, clenching around his cock as he moved. A moan was practically on the tip of Ciel's tongue but he managed to keep it in because he was sure he'd go mad if Alois stopped a second time.  
  
"Oh fuck, Ciel... you feel, ah... fucking good, so... hard."  
  
Everything went slow, one lean body doing its utmost to frustrate, the other aching from being tense for too long. Ciel wanted to tear himself free; to touch, feel and pound into the blonde but no matter how much he jerked his arms, the cloth stayed unharmed.  
  
It was maddening how amazing Alois felt around him, his warm insides squeezing him just right. Ciel could feel every inch of him sliding in and out as the blonde flexed his thighs to lift his lithe form and lower himself again and again. The sounds Alois breathed out was driving him insane, every time that round bottom would come down to rub over slender hips Ciel had to bite his tongue to keep himself from cursing and raising himself to get even deeper.  
  
The smaller male's thighs were quivering with frustration, every pore working to cover him in perspiration until he finally lost all control and pressed naked feet into wrinkled sheets, shoving his teenage dick as hard as he could into the stunning creature perched on his tip.  
  
"Fuck! Ciel—augh!" Alois reached behind himself, letting lean fingers clench around the base of Ciel's shaft as he let the entire length of the thing slip out of his hole. He snickered as Ciel whined at the loss of friction, sliding his ass over the sweaty chest until he was straddling his ribcage. A firm hand clutched a panting jaw, squeezing bone and separating lips even more as he lowered his head to whisper, "I could walk out this room, letting you lay here all alone with that poor dick of yours all hard and unsatisfied. You'd probably get loose eventually, being forced to jack that little thing in your lonesome. Is that what you want?" A demeaning smack was delivered to Ciel's flushed cheek with the last word, resulting in him growling between his teeth.  
  
"Untie me."  
  
"No can do."  
  
"Un-fucking-tie me or so help m—"  
  
"What're you gonna do? You can't do anything. You're mine, you're at my mercy – and you will do as I say."  
  
The seconds passed, Ciel huffing into the blonde's face, vexed to no end. But the silence didn't last for long as the younger male whispered the exact words that Alois wanted to hear without even knowing it.  
  
"I want to see you."  
  
"You want to—"  
  
"I want to watch you, I can't stand not being able to see your face."  
  
That was all it took for the blonde to drop his teasing attitude and soften considerably. The wish being exuded by Ciel was hitting him right in the heart and no matter how fun Alois had while torturing him, there was no way he could deny the other what he was asking for.  
  
The blindfold was swiftly pulled off and thrown away to be forgotten. Tired orbs blinked to get used to the dim light before they rolled to fall on the most flawless person in existence. Ciel was in awe of the breathtaking thing on top of him as their eyes met, and the blonde had an expression the smaller male had never seen before.

Alois looked like he couldn't believe where he was and that was exactly how he felt.  
  
The blonde's lips fell apart to speak even though he had no idea what he wanted to say, but he never had to figure it out as Ciel's head lifted, his dark locks falling over his cheeks when his mouth smashed into Alois'.  
  
Passionate was a mild word to describe the way they were consuming each other, swallowing breaths and devouring moans. Teeth tugged at rosy lips, tongues messily gliding and pushing to taste and feel. Uncontrolled fingers tangled in those damp locks as the other set of hands pulled at the ebony fabric in a fruitless attempt to break free. Alois' lower half was rubbing over a heaving torso, breathing near frantic through his nose, more heated than he'd ever been before. Ciel was losing it fast, his muscles tensing and relaxing to keep himself from humping the air.  
  
"P-please..." Ciel broke the kiss with a gasp of a plea, leaking all over his abdomen, the reddened flesh twitching in excitement despite him already having reached orgasm once. He couldn't imagine how Alois must feel where he rolled over his sweaty skin in search of friction, but he didn't have to wonder for long. Those skilled hips hurriedly slid down his chest to settle right above his swollen tip, the blonde dragging his backside against him so lewdly that Ciel whined.  
  
"Fuck me Ciel. Kiss me and fuck me." Alois huffed out his hot wish, catching the other's lips once again just as he grabbed Ciel's hard dick for the hundredth time and shoved it back into his tight hole.  
  
The blonde didn't have to ask twice once Ciel was encased in the delicious heat that was Alois Trancy and with a jerk and a low grunt he pushed his heels into the mattress, slamming his cock into clenching insides.  
  
Cheeks flexed as Ciel lifted from crumpled sheets, pounding the blonde harder than he ever had before. Alois latched onto the younger's raised biceps, burying sharp nails deep, clawing unmarred flesh as his mouth fell open and eyes squeezed shut.  
  
"A-aah y-you're gonna make me—Ciel!" Alois screamed, his ass getting fucked exactly like he wanted to, Ciel lips stealing whatever words the blonde was planning on moaning out next as he shoved his tongue right into his gaping mouth.  
  
The wet sounds of lips sloppily colliding as jaws dropped, the slapping of skin hitting skin, the exhales from two males unable to ever get enough – it was deafening.  
  
A thick tip pushed against hidden spots, making it almost impossible to keep the kiss going as Alois went completely crazy, whimpering his pleasure into the hot room. Ciel was determined to keep his mouth on him, his teeth seizing and tugging at the blonde's swollen lip as hot breaths mixed.  
  
Alois began pushing back and moving in circles around the rigid flesh, stroking slick skin with soft walls. A small smile was curving the sides of the blonde's mouth as his motions caused Ciel to rip his lips from his in a deep groan.  
  
"Ugh, d-don't stop..."  
  
"I won't... I c-can't," Alois said, pressing down on Ciel's length as he flicked his naughty tongue over a chin glistening with sweat, lapping up the salty beads before he continued, "S-say my name Ciel, please."  
  
Ciel's thrusts were becoming uncoordinated and messy, distracted with the way Alois was moving on top of him, how he slid down over his throbbing cock to meet him halfway. Wiry legs were trembling as the younger male slowed down his eager bucking, letting the blonde take the lead as he breathed, "Alois... Alois, you feel too good..."  
  
Alois did nothing but smile at the other's words as he raised his upper body, sitting up straight and looking down at the wrecked male. Thin, red lines where nails had scraped were riding down bounds arms and fair skin was smooth and damp as those big, mismatched eyes were looking right at him, starting at the blonde's flushed face to roll down and fixate on his bobbing erection.  
  
Fingertips magnetized to the sensitive skin, giving Ciel a show as Alois slowly bounced up and down and teased himself with feather light touches.  
  
"Nnh ah, are you close?" Alois played with his long digits over the head of his dick, the velvety curve getting circled and toyed with by his own ministrations.  
  
"Y-yes."  
  
"Do you like watching me?"  
  
"You know I do."  
  
"I want to hear you say it." The blonde finally grasped his shaft, pumping slowly in time with the movement of his hips.  
  
"Just... just the sight of you..."  
  
"Yeah?" Sultry eyes were locked on blushing cheeks as Ciel tried to express how he felt. Alois was hard in his hand and despite his anticipation, his motions became rougher, lifting and sinking his ass like he was building up for something wild.  
  
"I never want to stop looking at you."  
  
Alois didn't need anything else to make his entire body shake. He could barely move properly but he moved like he meant it; impaling himself over and over on Ciel's swollen cock as he stroked himself.  
  
"Aah you—hnngh!" Every inch of Ciel tingled, his dark strands sticking to his sweaty forehead as eyelids fell over glittering orbs. Strained skin was slippery and throbbing as it slipped in and out of the blonde's twitching hole, Ciel’s arms and legs unable to stay still.

For the thousand time the younger jerked his wrists to finally manage to ease the sore skin out of the restraints and not more than a second passed before two pale chests collided as Ciel practically flew up from the mattress to embrace Alois.  
  
Depraved hands were all over working limbs and silky locks, ripping and clawing as Ciel's mouth found that long, tempting neck. One could almost get fooled into believing he wanted to eat the blonde by the way he tore into the flesh, grunting out his hunger over hot skin.  
  
"Ah g-god—FUCK!" Alois nearly screamed, suddenly being handled so roughly taking him completely by surprise. Even if he wasn't used to it, the blonde couldn't really complain because this was just how he liked it. He'd been waiting for Ciel to loosen up and be reckless, and his fist pumped his length even faster as his excitement skyrocketed.  
  
"Mm, keep moving like... ah, like that," Ciel panted, raising his hips as he stroked the soft skin of the blonde's back. A wet mouth attacked a pink nipple as Ciel completely lost control, messily kissing and nipping the salty flesh of Alois' front.  
  
"Hah h-harder harder! Fuck I'm... I'm..."  
  
One body was thrusting and the other was meeting them and as Alois lowered himself after one particularly violent bite to his shoulder he felt himself burst between their hammering hearts, warm drops tainting them both as he quivered through his climax.  
  
"A-ah Ciel, I-I'm... I think that I'm in lo-"  
  
"Alo-Alois!"  
  
Ciel's breath got caught in his throat as Alois pulsed around him, his insides squeezing his shaft to the point of madness. His lips ripped from the blonde's bitten neck as he tilted his head back and almost broke the milky skin of Alois' back with his sharp nails.  
  
Lean arms were flung around Ciel's neck as the blonde felt himself getting filled to the brim; hot, sticky liquid being pumped into him as the smaller male bucked his hips to get deeper still.  
  
Ciel's thighs were shuddering by the time the last spurt were shot into the blonde and he practically collapsed as his orgasm faded, Alois falling with him to land on top of his chest.  
  
The only sounds that could be heard were the males' panting breaths as they held onto each other. The blonde placed a few tired pecks on Ciel's neck before he rested his head on his hot chest, listening to the beating of his racing heart.  
  
“Ciel?” Alois suddenly mumbled.  
  
“Yes?”  
  
“Next time I’m fucking your ass.”  
  
Ciel couldn’t keep himself from letting out a small laugh at those words and reached up to stroke the blonde’s silky locks as he replied, “You’ll never stick your dick in my ass.”  
  
“Yes I will.”  
  
“Keep dreaming.”  
  
“Hah… you know I’ll do it eventually,” Alois teased, angling his head to look up at Ciel, “I always get what I want.”  
  
“So I’ve noticed,” Ciel snorted. “You don’t like getting fucked by me?”  
  
“Oh Ciel…” Alois said with a sigh and a faint laugh. “I love your fucking skills, don’t worry about that. Your dick is… it’s a really good dick, like—“  
  
“Stop talking about my dick!”  
  
Alois chuckled and raised his head, folding his arms over Ciel’s warm chest. “Am I embarrassing you? Are you blushing?” A thin finger was poked into a reddened cheek as the blonde smirked, “Yep, I’m pretty sure that’s a blush.”  
  
“Can you just stop?” Ciel snapped, averting his gaze with pursed lips.  
  
“Nope,” Alois replied, lowering his head to whisper in Ciel’s ear, “I sure you’d enjoy it a lot, I mean you _really_ liked it when I fingered you...”  
  
“Alois!” Ciel exclaimed, trying to push the blonde away from him without success. “Don’t… don’t talk about that.”  
  
“What’s so wrong about it anyway? Is it unmanly? Too gay for Mr. Straight?”  
  
“It’s just… I’m… shut up!”  
  
The blonde smiled. “You’re so cute right now.”  
  
“Alois…”  
  
“Okay, okay, I’ll shut it. I just have one more question.”  
  
Ciel sighed. “Shoot.”  
  
“What are we?” Alois asked in a tone that was more curious than anything else, but Ciel’s heartbeat still quickened.  
  
"What do you mean?"  
  
"Like... we're friends... and we fuck. Are we fuck buddies or are we something else?"  
  
"Do we really have to discuss this? I don't really care what we are." Ciel wasn’t ready for this – it had only been a week. He was still dealing with the fact that he was spending his nights with another male and the topic now up for discussion was too much to handle.  
  
"You don't... care?"  
  
"I mean... I don't know... I can't think about that right now. Can't we just continue whatever this is?"  
  
"Do you have any feelings for me?"  
  
"Alois, I..." Ciel started but he wasn’t sure what he wanted to say – he had no idea what he felt.  
  
"I just want to know what you're thinking. I'm a human being, you know - with emotions,” Alois mumbled, followed by a yawn as he once again placed his head on Ciel’s chest, his pale cheek pressing against damp skin.  
  
"Yeah, I'm sorry, I know. I just need some time to figure stuff out. Do we really have to define our relationship right now?"  
  
"I guess not..."  
  
"I'm not ready for anyone to know, okay?"  
  
"Okay. I'll take whatever you're willing to give me. I'm just happy you haven't left yet," Alois murmured against Ciel's skin in a voice that clearly told the other that he wasn't entirety awake.  
  
Ciel swallowed and stared up at the white ceiling, letting minutes pass as he tried to make sense of his thoughts. The longer he laid there the more serene everything became. Alois' warm body resting against his, completely still save for the heavy breaths expanding his torso, was probably the most soothing thing he had ever felt.  
  
Arms and legs wrapped tighter around the blonde as Ciel let it all go and just hugged him, burying his face in Alois' soft locks to feel all of him. Ciel couldn't explain why he suddenly got this urge; for some reason he just had to be as close as possible.  
  
The blonde didn't wake up; he only hummed as Ciel embraced him. It felt safe, like the world made sense and that things started falling into place. Ciel felt like nothing could make his life better than it was in this moment – and it confused him to no end.  
  
"I don't know what I want or what I feel," Ciel mumbled as quietly as he could, careful not to wake Alois up. "I just… I just know that I want to be with you… all the time.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'll try to hurry up with the next chapter, I promise.
> 
> Give kudos and comments, please :)


	19. Chapter 19

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for the comments guys. You know I love you.
> 
> Enjoy the chapter :)

Roughly a month had passed since Christmas and students once again filled the halls and corridors. Alois and Ciel had spent the last few weeks together, enjoying the break in each other’s company almost around the clock. They were rarely seen apart, not even when they occasionally met up with their friends. Ciel didn’t mind; if anyone suspected anything they had the decency not to confront him about it and that was all he needed. He had no desire to discuss his love life, his sexual preferences nor his relationship status with anyone.  
  
Lizzy called him on occasion and it seemed as if they could manage a friendly relationship, and Ciel was immensely glad about that. He cared about her a lot; she had been a part of his life for so long and he was happy that she still wanted to be around him.   
  
Lizzy had been respectful about his relationship with Alois and had done her best not to question Ciel, although she occasionally demanded to hear some details when she couldn’t contain her curiosity. Ciel let her get away with it – he saw it as practice. He knew he had to explain everything to everyone soon enough, but he still couldn’t figure out what or how he would tell them.   
  
If anyone were to ask him if he and Alois were a couple Ciel wouldn’t have an answer to give them because they still hadn’t figured that part out yet. The two males just went with the flow, taking every day as it came and simply enjoyed each other’s company.   
  
If Ciel would have wanted, he could have defined their relationship right then and there but he was still uncomfortable with the thought of him having a _boyfriend_. Still, that was what he saw them as; no one spends that much time together and has that much sex without being something more than simply friends with benefits.  
  
“Get your filthy hands off my food!” Lizzy shrieked and slapped Alois’ fingers from her plate. To everyone’s surprise she followed her outburst with a snicker and gave the other blonde a friendly smile. “Use a fork.”  
  
Ciel was baffled. Lizzy had gone from despising Alois to being overly kind to him in a matter of days. When she had returned to campus after Christmas break she had acted like Alois was one of her most favored people in the world.   
  
Ciel figured she might be acting this way because she wanted to show her support and therefore tried really hard to act like a decent human being around his new _friend_. But after a few days she seemed to genuinely begin to accept Alois – maybe even enjoy his company. Ciel couldn’t complain though; he was grateful that she went to such great lengths to make him happy and he was glad to see that she wasn’t hurting over their breakup anymore.  
  
“Forks are boring!” Alois threw away his cutlery, tossing the thing over his shoulder without any regards to the students sitting behind him. Fortunately for him no one was hit as the fork flew through the air, the steel clinking as it collided with the floor and slid under a chair. Long fingers dug into the stew on his plate to later get licked and nibbled with a smile as Alois began eating his food with his hand.  
  
Ciel shot a frown in the blonde’s direction at the unseemly display. “You’re disgusting.”  
  
The sound of Alois swallowing was followed by a soft laugh. “Oh, don’t tell me you just figured that out.”  
  
Ciel couldn’t keep himself from letting out a small chuckle before he picked up his fork to dig in on his own food. “No, I guess not. Just try to be a little discreet, okay?"  
  
Paula—Lizzy’s older sister—had joined them in the cafeteria today. She rarely hung out with them, but Ciel always enjoyed it when she did. She was like a glittering ray of sunshine and never seemed to be able to be anything less than that.  
  
“I think you’re sweet. You look just like a little monkey,” Paula chirped.  
  
“You did not just say that…” Ciel sighed and lowered his gaze to his plate.  
  
“I hear monkeys throw food at each other." Alois had a smirk on his lips, his mischievous orbs wandering between Paula and Ciel as he mushed a potato with the pad of his index finger.  
  
“Alois, no. Don’t.” Ciel’s eyes went wide as the blonde raised his hand with a piece of carrot pinned between two of his digits. “Please, Alois. We’re in a public area,” he begged.  
  
Alois grinned and it was undoubtedly wicked. Still, he proceeded by shoving the vegetable in his mouth instead of throwing it like Ciel knew he wanted to. The blonde had come to listen to him much more than before, to Ciel’s great relief. Alois easily succumbed to sudden cravings of performing crazy impulsive acts but as long as Ciel was there to stop him, he usually kept himself in check.  
  
Usually.  
  
Not more than five second later Alois let that same hand fall to his lap before he delicately slid his fingers over to Ciel’s thigh. A smooth palm glided over rough denim before the blonde stopped to deliver a squeeze to the tense muscle.   
  
Ciel quickly grabbed the blonde’s wrist and pulled his hand away from him, teeth clenched and breath elevated. The mistake the younger made was to release Alois because the moment he was free, those fingers came right back to bug him. Limbs were stiff as a board as the blonde stroked Ciel's inner thigh, sliding his palm all the way up and stopping right before it would have grazed his crotch.  
  
Thin lips parted to hiss a set of foul words just as Alois tenderly clenched down on the soft bulge between Ciel's legs and he jumped, causing Finny to snap his head in his direction. His roommate narrowed his eyes and Ciel dug his fingernails into Alois' forearm in aggravation. When the blonde still didn't remove his hand he had to suppress the urge to punch him in the face.  
  
“I bit my tongue." Ciel mumbled his quick lie and went back to his food, doing his best to ignore both males.  
  
“Whatever you say,” Finny muttered back with a small smile tugging at his lips.  
  
When Finny turned his gaze away, Ciel glared angrily at Alois. “This is not the time,” he hissed but the blonde ignored him and burst out in laughter. He must have contained it for quite a while by the sound of it.  
  
Ciel kicked him under the table for it and by now everyone was facing their direction with curious expressions. A muffled squeal ended Alois' laughter as Ciel’s boot met his shin, but his moronic smile remained.  
  
“What happened? Did I miss something?” Paula asked with disappointment lacing her tone. “Did you just kick Alois, Ciel?” She raised her eyebrows and looked thoroughly amused.  
  
Ciel groaned and was just about to speak when the blonde delivered another squeeze to his private parts. What came out of Ciel’s mouth were not the words he had intended, but instead a muffled moan flew past his lips, causing his cheeks to flare up in an instant.  
  
“Will you stop that?!” Ciel snapped.  
  
“What are you doing, Alois?” Finny asked, tilting his head to check under the table.  
  
Ciel shot up from his chair, anger coursing through his small frame; his knuckles were turning white from balling up his hands into fists, his lips were pursed, and Alois did nothing but smirk at his vexation.  
  
“He… he keeps pinching me!” Ciel made up before snatching his bag from the floor. “I have to go. My class is about to start."  
  
“What’s up with him?” Finny muttered, looking as surprised as everyone else.  
  
“Why'd you do that?” Lizzy snarled quietly, glaring at Alois, and he was certain that she suspected that he’d been doing something lewd under the table.  
  
Alois frowned and locked his eyes with hers. “Hey... this is me we’re talking about here. I do stuff like that all the time – you shouldn’t be surprised and neither should Ciel.”  
  
“Alois, keep it down.” Lizzy looked over at the other two, not surprised to discover that both of them were quietly picking at their food, and most certainly listening in. She groaned and leaned over the table to whisper in Alois' ear, “You have to respect that he isn’t ready to tell anyone yet.”  
  
“I have been respecting him!” Alois burst out, not caring in the slightest if Finny and Paula heard what he had to say. “I’m just getting real sick of always hiding and restraining myself! And I’m pretty sure everyone already knows anyway.”  
  
“Know what?” Paula asked before Finny had the chance. “That you and Ciel are boyfriends? Of course I know that – you can see it from a mile away.”  
  
Finny chuckled and nodded. “Yeah, everyone knows. I think Sebastian knew even before Ciel did," he confirmed happily before his face turned a tad more serious. "I’ll talk to him, Alois."  
  
The older blonde grinned from ear to ear as he leaned back in his seat and folded his arms over his chest. The frail plastic backrest whined in protest as he shifted and rolled his eyes back to Lizzy.   
  
“Told you, sugar. Besides—hold on, someone’s calling me,” Alois muttered as fumbling digits reached for his tight jeans to retrieve his phone from his pocket. Pale lips pressed together as the male stared at the flashing device in his palm.  
  
“Sorry, I have to take this." Alois slid his finger over the screen before he quickly reached down and grabbed his bag, practically running away from the others. A deep sigh was breathed out as he lifted his phone to his ear and murmured, "What do you want, dad?”

* * *

The laptop was hot in Finny's lap, the form lying next to him even just as warm as he turned away from the movie they were watching. Ciel was deeply concentrated on the actions taking place on the screen as his roommate opened his mouth, blissfully unaware of what his best friend had planned.  
  
“You don’t have to be ashamed of your relationship you know. We still like you no matter who you choose to be with."  
  
Ciel’s eyes went wide and his heart sped up, a cold rush of panic shooting through his body as he retorted with a flustered stutter. “W-what do y-you mean?” He knew that it was a pointless question, but he wasn’t ready to talk about this. In all honestly he didn’t know if he ever would be.  
  
The blonde let out an exasperated sigh and rolled his eyes as he shoved the laptop to the end of the bed. It was time to bring everything to the surface and he was determined to get Ciel to talk.  
  
"Everyone already knows about you two," Finny said, sheets wrinkling as he turned to face his friend with his entire frame.  
  
Ciel pursed his lips at his words and shifted uncomfortably as small drops of sweat began accumulating on his forehead. “I figured you did…” he murmured, a blush creeping forward, tinting his cheeks with a light scarlet. “But I’ve never done anything like this before, I don’t know how… I don’t know… uhm…”   
  
The words got caught in Ciel's throat and no matter how much he swallowed he couldn’t break them loose. With a tired motion he brushed a few dampened strands of hair from his forehead and looked down at his feet, desperately trying to figure out what he should say.  
  
“Calm down… let’s go about this a different way.” Finny gazed up at the ceiling, pondering in silence while all Ciel could manage while he waited was to roll his thumbs. “Tell me about the first time you kissed.”  
  
Mismatched eyes left white socks in order to stare at Finny in confusion. "What? You already know about that.”  
  
“I mean the first time where it actually meant something.”  
  
“Oh…” Ciel didn’t have to think long before he answered. “It was a few days after Lizzy and I broke up.”  
  
“Tell me about it.” With curious eyes Finny pressed his elbow into the mattress to rest his chin in his palm.  
  
“Do I have to? How’s that going to help?” Ciel looked away, feeling irritation bubble up inside of him. He saw no point in telling Finny about the kiss, and the fact that it led to their first time in bed didn’t make it easier to talk about.  
  
The blonde's smile dropped and he sat up straight. “Yes you have to! Otherwise you’ll never be able to take down this ridiculous wall you’ve put up between you and everyone else. Your friends want to be a part of your life and we want you to be happy." Finny paused, concern covering his features as he bore his gaze into the male pressed against the headboard. "And you won’t be happy for much longer if you keep pretending like you’re not in love.”  
  
Ciel gulped and his hands quivered in his lap when Finny’s two last words reached his ears. “Excuse me?”  
  
“You have feelings for him, right? Don’t tell me you don’t – that lame smile you get every time you see him is all the proof I need to know that you’re lying.”  
  
With a loud groan Ciel squirmed out of the bed, his soles meeting the carpet with a thud as he got to his feet. He couldn't stand looking at Finny's caring face for one more second.   
  
“Can we come back to that question? Ask something else,” he muttered as he walked over to his own bed and fell back on the mattress. Tired eyes locked on the white ceiling as he intertwining his fingers on his chest with a sigh.  
  
“Alright, if that’s what you need—wait. What about that kiss in the bathroom? Didn’t that kiss mean anything? I know you said it didn’t, but I never really believed you.” Finny scooted closer to the edge, his fingers curling around crumpled sheets as he waited for his roommate to speak.  
  
Ciel’s mind wandered back to that moment, feeling his heart thrumming in his chest at the mere thought. It was the first time he and Alois had ever done anything of an intimate nature and the memory sent shivers throughout his entire body.  
  
“I’m not sure…” Ciel admitted hesitantly. “It did mean _something_ , but I can’t tell you what because I don't know myself.”  
  
“Okay so… after you and Lizzy broke up you two kissed. Who kissed who? How did it happen?”  
  
Ciel squeezed his eyes shut and exhaled shakily. He was still not catching up with reality; the fact that he was actually talking with someone about this was something he had put up for so long and he had pushed it so far back in his brain that the situation almost seemed surreal.  
  
“I went to him and I… kissed him.”  
  
“You kissed him…” Finny murmured in a surprised tone. “What happened next?”  
  
“We had sex.”  
  
“What? Right away? How was it?”   
  
Finny bounced on the edge of his bed and Ciel tried not to get vexed by his excitement – but it wasn't easy. He had to hold back curses every five seconds and it seemed as digging your nails into your palms was a good method to keep your outbursts to a minimum.  
  
“Uh… It was fine.”  
  
“Fine? Just fine? Did he… put it in you?”  
  
Ciel's back shot straight up from the mattress as he snapped his head to face his friend, his eyes widened to the point where Ciel thought they might pop right out of their sockets.   
  
“W-what? No!”  
  
“So you put it in him then?”  
  
Ciel’s heart was hammering in his ribcage; he was so uncomfortable speaking about this that for a moment he actually considered running out the door, throwing away his phone and taking the next flight to Africa.  
  
It was unbearable to keep his eyes on Finny as Ciel mentally prepared himself to give an answer. After five seconds that felt like two hours he finally said, “Yes…”  
  
“Cool! I had such trouble imagining which one of you would—“  
  
“Oh just shut up, Finny!”  
  
“Okay, okay, you’re right. So… What happened next?”  
  
“What do you mean?”  
  
“Did you two just continue having sex or what?”  
  
“Kind of, yeah…”  
  
“And then you got feelings for him.”  
  
“Yes.” The word flew past Ciel's lips before he could think. Saying it out loud made a horde of emotions rush through him. It was true; he had feelings for Alois.   
  
As the truth fell down on Ciel like a sledgehammer he realized he had felt it for a long time. Perhaps even before they got around to finally having sex.  
  
_I’m in love with Alois._

* * *

Ciel raised his phone to his ear, listening to the tones as he waited for Alois to pick up. This was the third time he had called him and there was still no answer.   
  
With a sigh Ciel shoved the device back into the front pocket of his jeans and decided to go over to the blonde's dorm instead. He figured Alois must have dozed off on the bed as he often did in the midst of studying.  
  
The reason Ciel wanted to get in touch with the blonde was that he wanted to tell him about his conversation with Finny. He had to tell him that they didn’t need to hide anymore. It could wait of course, but for some reason Ciel just had to tell him right away. He was surprised by his own enthusiasm, but he figured it must have to do with him burying and ignoring this for so long.  
  
As usual, Finny had known what he needed to hear. He had a way of keeping Ciel stable, and even if he aggravated him to no end while doing so, he was still immensely grateful. Finny had been right about him keeping a wall between him and everyone else. All that was going on between him and Alois was still so new, and Ciel had just barely come to terms with him being involved with someone of the male gender.  
  
Talking to Finny had been relieving, even if it had made Ciel extremely uncomfortable. The words had been begging him to let them free all along; he had just been in need of a little push.   
  
Ciel couldn’t help but wonder what it would be like being able to show his affection in public, but he was sure Alois would let it all loose as soon as he heard and probably try to have sex with him on one of the tables in the cafeteria.  
  
Ciel couldn’t bring himself to be bothered by those thoughts though; he was flooded by emotions he’d never felt before. It was a new feeling, letting it all free and completely accepting who he was and who he wanted to be with. Ciel had undoubtedly fallen for that impetuous nutcase and he was determined to take all of him, including his wild ways and crazy whims. After all, it was that side of the blonde that had made him interested in the first place.  
  
On his way to Alois’ dorm it almost felt as if he was breathing fresh air for the first time in months. Ciel kept picturing the blonde's reaction when he told him, wondering what he might do.   
  
Would Alois drag him out and kiss him on the streets? Would he make him invite all his friends over just so they could cuddle in front of them? Both scenarios seemed plausible and even though Ciel probably wouldn’t let the blonde do any of those things, his stomach still fluttered at the thought.   
  
The fact that Alois wanted to show him off was kind of flattering in a way – it made him feel special.  
  
When Ciel reached the familiar door, he gave it two careless knocks before he opened it and stepped inside, not bothering to wait for Alois to invite him in. Being courteous around the blonde seemed almost a bit rude considering his unruly personality.  
  
When the door swung open, Ciel frowned. Alois stood by his bed with a plum bag on his arm – the same bag he always brought with him when he was spending a few nights at Ciel's dorm. A pair of dark skinny jeans rode down his long legs, a short black leather jacket covered his torso, and his white sneakers were tied on his feet.  
  
"Oh hi, Ciel." The male looked thoroughly confused when he noticed Ciel in the doorway and snatched one last item from the bedspread—his phone—before he turned to face him completely.   
  
“Are you going somewhere?” Ciel asked, fingers curling around the frame. He raised an eyebrow in surprise when he saw a quick flash of fear pass over the blonde's features.  
  
“Yeah…” Alois murmured. “I was going to text you later and tell you. My dad called me; I have to go over there for a couple of days. He needs me to watch my brother while he takes care of some things.”  
  
“Can’t Luka come here?” Ciel asked in a desperate tone that had Alois furrowing his brows for a short second.  
  
“No he can’t. It’s complicated… and I don’t really have time to explain it. Can I call you later?” Alois took a few steps towards Ciel but stopped abruptly when the male didn’t move out of the way.  
  
“I won’t let you go there,” Ciel asserted in a strict tone.  
  
Alois’ expression turned into a frown, several seconds passing in silence before he opened his mouth to question the other.   
  
“Uhm... why?”  
  
“Don’t think I don’t know about your dad – I’m not stupid." Ciel had waited a long time to get this out in the open and the frustration he had built up regarding the matter made him sound angry when all he really felt was concern. "I’ve seen you come back with bruises two times now. You always dodge the subject when I bring it up but you should know that it’s clear as day what he does to you.”  
  
Alois’ fingers trembled slightly when the last syllable was barked out by Ciel and he had to ponder on his words for a short moment before he finally parted his lips. “Ciel, you... you don’t understand. I _have_ to go.”  
  
“Then I’ll go with you. I won’t let him hurt you.”  
  
“You can’t! Please just… just let it go. I can handle myself. I‘ve done so my whole life and I can do so now.”   
  
Alois’ eyes turned dark and he tried to push the other male out of the way. But Ciel was determined to keep him from leaving and used all his might to stand his ground because there was just no way he could watch the blonde walk away when he knew where he was going. Unfortunately Ciel couldn’t do much about his stature and being over three inches taller, Alois could easily shove him aside on his second attempt.   
  
“This is my problem and I don’t want you to get involved,” the blonde murmured as he stepped out into the hallway.  
  
“Just tell me what’s going on!” Ciel shouted, on the verge of panic. He couldn’t let him leave; there was no way he could just sit by while Alois was over at his father’s house, getting beaten or worse.  
  
“I can’t.”  
  
“Can’t or won’t?”  
  
“Both. Now please get out so I can lock the door.”  
  
“No. I won’t let you go. I refuse to just stand idly by when I know you're getting hurt,” Ciel rumbled. "If you won't listen to me—"  
  
"GET OUT!" Alois' fingers curled around Ciel's bicep in the blink of an eye, yanking him out into the hallway like a ragdoll.  
  
"Ugh!" Ciel wasn't prepared for the other's sudden actions and he stumbled, reaching for anything to keep himself standing. Without success, he toppled over, falling on his ass on the dirty floor.  
  
Teeth were clenched as Ciel watched the blonde slam his door shut and reach inside his pocket for his keys. His heart started racing. He couldn't let him leave. With a low growl he got on all fours and wrapped his arms around Alois' legs.  
  
"Ciel what the fu—agh!"  
  
Ciel squeezed and jerked, causing the blonde to lose his balance and join him on the floor. Alois landed on his side with a low thud and Ciel quickly climbed over him to push him down on his stomach.  
  
"GET THE FUCK OFF OF ME I HAVE TO GO!"  
  
"NO!" Ciel didn't know where he got the power or the skill but he somehow managed to get on top of Alois and straddle his waist. Despite him writhing like an anaconda on speed, Ciel succeeded in seizing both his arms by the wrists, holding them in place behind the blonde's back.  
  
“Oh, for the love of…” Alois growled, squirming and kicking like his life depended on it. Ciel used all of his willpower and feeble strength to hold him down as panic and adrenalin coursed through his veins.  
  
“If you don't tell me what's going on then I swear I’ll go over there and ask that sick fuck myself,” Ciel huffed angrily, making sure his threat was taken seriously.  
  
“If you do that...” Alois groaned, "...it'll only make it worse.” He started tossing back and forth in an attempt to get his arms loose and he would've been successful had Ciel not thrown himself on top of his back, using his entire body weight to keep him down.   
  
Ciel's fingers squeezed around the blonde's wrists as he panted against his damp nape, the silky strands of hair stirring as he spoke.  
  
"Please, tell me."  
  
Alois let out a breathless grunt before he sighed deeply. “No! For fucks sake Ciel, just let me go! I’m going to be late!”  
  
Ciel swallowed hard when actual tears started burning in the corners of his eyes; the thought of him releasing Alois and letting him go to that disgusting excuse of a human being had him sick to his stomach and he just couldn’t bear the thought.  
  
“Why won’t you let me help you?” he choked out, his limbs trembling and his chest contracting painfully.  
  
A deep sigh was breathed out at the sound of Ciel's anxious voice, and Alois relaxed his muscles completely before he whispered, “No one can help me…”  
  
“I know you think that but please, let me come with you.”  
  
Alois suddenly tensed up again and spat, “Don’t you dare go there! You will ruin everything! Do you hear me, Ciel? Swear to me that you won’t!” With the last word, Alois managed to yank one of his hands from Ciel’s grip and that was all he needed to in order to get Ciel off of him and get to his feet.  
  
Ciel was just as quick as the blonde as he stood up, fully prepared to start yelling, when Alois unexpectedly lowered his head. Instead of peppering Ciel with insults, he nervously rubbed his belly, his expression turning from upset to rueful in a second.   
  
Ciel took a few steps towards Alois, suddenly wanting nothing more than to embrace him, but when the blonde met his gaze he stopped abruptly.  
  
“I will tell you everything; I just don’t have time right now. Just promise me you won’t come after me. I need you to promise me. _Please_.”  
  
Ciel knew that he was defeated and he couldn’t do anything about it. “I promise,” he whispered, feeling his insides twisting up as he uttered the words.  
  
"Thank you."  
  
Mismatched eyes studied Alois in silence as he picked up his bag and went to lock his door. Ciel was breathing heavily, frustration and mental anguish causing his hands to tremble. He had no idea what to say or do to keep the blonde close to him. He could do nothing but watch the young man he cared for leave willingly to be with a person that caused him suffering.  
  
"Bye." The word was barely audible as Alois started walking through the hallway. Swallowing hard, he tried to fend off the tears that threatened to spill from his eyes. He had no idea that his wellbeing meant that much to Ciel.  
  
The blonde was just about to disappear around the corner when he changed his mind and ran back to Ciel, catching his small frame in a tight hug.   
  
“I know that you only care about me,” Alois breathed into his dark locks. “I'll be okay, I swear." He released Ciel and looked down at him with a sad smile on his lips. “You know you mean the world to me, right? So don’t go and do something stupid that might get you into trouble. I’ll be back before you know it.”  
  
And with that, he finally turned around and left.

* * *

Ciel had paced around his room for the past day and a half and Finny was starting to get worried.  
  
“Ciel?” he asked carefully. “You seem on edge, what’s wrong?”  
  
A groan emitted from Ciel as he pulled at his hair, stomping over to his bed and falling down on the mattress with a huff. “I’m just waiting for a call that never comes.” A sigh was exhaled as he rolled his orbs to stare at the ceiling.  
  
“Alois?”  
  
“Yes… He said he would call me yesterday but he never did.”  
  
“I didn’t know you were this needy for attention, Ciel,” Finny said with raised eyebrows before he flipped down the screen of his laptop.  
  
“I’m not! God… It’s just… I can’t tell you.”  
  
“Are you two having problems?”  
  
Ciel thought for a while before he answered. “We had a fight.”  
  
“Why don’t you call him?”  
  
Ciel was just about to give a bad lie when his phone lit up and his heart immediately began racing in his chest. Alois’ name flashed on the screen and he quickly answered and pressed the device to his ear.  
  
“Alois! Are you okay?”  
  
The blonde chuckled on the other end. “I’m fine,” he assured him in a tired voice.  
  
“Are you back in your dorm?”  
  
“Yes."  
  
“I just… uhm." Ciel rubbed the back of his neck. "Are we okay?”  
  
“Of course we are. Don’t worry about what happened. I understand why you did it.”  
  
“Oh… good,” Ciel mumbled.  
  
“Hey, why did you even come over to my dorm in the first place? I never asked you.”  
  
“Because I wanted to tell you something."  
  
"And what was so important you had to walk all the way to my place?"  
  
"Uhm... that everyone kinda knows."  
  
Alois was silent for a few seconds before he finally said, “See you in two minutes,” and hung up before Ciel could say anything back.


	20. Chapter 20

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! I'm so happy about the feedback and loving comments you keep giving me. But you already know that. I just want to tell you again because you deserve to hear it. I hope you'll like this chapter and if you have any thoughts, be sure to tell me. Enjoy~
> 
> And I almost forgot the cute fanart I received. You can check it out [here](http://touch-me-trancy.tumblr.com/post/128879257004/beautiful-boys-from-idwtwy-sebby-finny-alois).

The phone call ended and Ciel barely had time to gather his thoughts before Alois came barging through his door a few minutes later, cheeks red and chest heaving. The blonde only gave Finny a quick glance of acknowledgement before he turned all his attention to Ciel.  
  
"You finally grew some balls! Took you long enough!"  
  
Ciel opened his mouth to respond but no words came out. He was too busy following the blonde with his gaze as he crawled over his sheets. As if completely oblivious of the other's intentions, Ciel just kept staring, even as Alois pushed him down and pressed his lips against his.  
  
Ciel’s eyes went wide for a second and on instinct he struggled and attempted to shove Alois away, but the blonde only responded by deepening the kiss. He could hear Finny chuckling faintly on the other side of the room and went into full on panic, kicking and pushing at the blonde's chest. With a frown, Alois finally parted their lips and looked down at Ciel’s flustered face.  
  
“Ciel?” the blonde asked in a strained tone, mouth pouting and unsatisfied.  
  
Ciel’s heart was thrumming like a drum as he tried to make sense of his own reaction. Slowly, he began to relax, remembering that this was why he had told Alois the news in the first place. He mentally slapped himself when he thought about how this must look and when he met Alois’ gaze he was not surprised to find that the older boy looked both bewildered and a bit hurt.  
  
“I-I'm sorry… I’m just…” Ciel murmured before hiding his face in his hands, thoroughly embarrassed and confused. He wanted to hit himself for acting so stupid but at the same time he had to realize that he still was uncomfortable with this. In his mind it had seemed so easy showing his affection in front of others, but now when he was actually doing it he still felt like he wanted to hide.  
  
Alois was just beginning to open his mouth to speak when Finny’s immensely annoyed voice echoed throughout the room.   
  
“I can’t believe you, Ciel! You’re still ashamed over kissing him even after all we talked about? Ugh... If you don’t kiss him properly right now, I’ll tell him what you told me two days ago."  
  
A sting of panic shot through Ciel but before he could smoothen his friend’s words over, Alois attacked him in a very excited tone.  
  
“Tell me what? I want to know!” Alois looked like he was about to burst from sheer excitement before he added, “You have to tell me now or else I’ll torture Finny until he spills it.”  
  
“He’s just messing with me. It’s nothing,” Ciel muttered confidently, but he barely managed to keep a straight face. Sweat was pouring out all over his small body and his face was turning an even darker shade of red with each passing second. There was no way he could tell Alois how he felt about him and he made a quick mental note to kick the living crap out of Finny later for bringing it up.  
  
Alois narrowed his eyes and gave Finny a quick glance before he turned back to Ciel. “You’re lying. Tell me.”  
  
An exasperated groan left Ciel’s lips before he put both of his hands on the sides of Alois’ head and placed a sloppy kiss on his lips. It was mostly to get him side-tracked, but as soon as he pulled away and he found that sparkling summer sky swimming with emotions, his body acted on its own. With a hammering heart he surprised both himself and Alois when he caught his lips once again.  
  
This kiss was different. It was special. It was a kiss that made Ciel forget all about his surroundings. He melted into it, and not even Finny’s weird noises of excitement caught his attention as Alois’ hands found their way into his hair and his soft tongue began moving with his own. It was the kiss that took away every desire Ciel had had to hide in an instant.  
  
Alois was the one to pull back, smiling like he had just won the lottery. Ciel was dazzled. He had finally done it; he had finally kissed Alois in front of one of his friends. He felt liberated, free, light. He was the straight A-student Ciel Phantomhive, in love with none other than the infamous party animal Alois Trancy, a guy. It was the reality he was living in and now he finally started to accept it fully.  
  
“I always knew something would happen between you guys,” Finny murmured across the room, eyes locked on their entangled bodies.  
  
“Oh really? How?” Alois asked him. Ciel hadn’t quite collected himself yet to question his friend’s statement.  
  
“I’ve known Ciel for most of his life – I saw the signs,” Finny said with a smug smile.  
  
“Can you two please stop talking about me? This isn’t something I’d like to discuss… and can you please get off of me now?”  
  
Alois let out a faint chuckle before he sat up and leaned his back against the wall. “Don’t think I’ve forgotten about that little thing Finny mentioned,” he reminded with a smirk, keeping his eyes fixed on Ciel as he folded his arms over his chest.  
  
“I fucking hate the both of you,” Ciel snarled, cheeks heating up in annoyance and anger. He couldn’t believe that Finny had threatened him like that; now he would have no choice but to tell Alois. If he couldn’t come up with a good lie that is. Ciel sat up on the bed, straightening his black t-shirt in a rough manner with an indignant frown on his face.  
  
“No you don’t.” Grinning, Alois gently placed one of his hands over Ciel’s and intertwined their fingers.  
  
The younger male's pulse immediately sped up, as it always did when Alois touched him in such a way. He looked down at their tangled hands just as the blonde began stroking him with his thumb. No matter how much Ciel tried, he couldn’t stay angry when the softness of the touch began sending small tingling sensations up his arm. Alois knew this of course; he always used this on him whenever he got upset, and simply thinking about how easily the blonde could read him by now forced Ciel to avert his gaze.  
  
“I can’t even begin to handle how cute you are together,” Finny suddenly blurted out after observing their tender moment in silence, eyes sparkling with enjoyment.  
  
Ciel quickly snatched his hand back, feeling adrenalin beginning to course through his veins. “We’re _not_ cute!”  
  
As he spat the words, Alois crawled up behind him and wrapped his legs around his waist. Before Ciel could react the blonde slid his arms under his, holding him in a tight grip around his ribcage.  
  
“We’re super cute.” Alois snickered against the sensitive skin on Ciel's neck, his warm breath stirring the fine hairs there.  
  
As much as Ciel's brain told him to push the blonde away to make his point, his body completely surrendered in his embrace. When Alois spoke again Ciel relaxed at the sound of his voice, leaning against him in the most non-cuddly way he could manage (it was still quite cuddly though).  
  
“You have no idea how hard it’s been not being able to touch you in front of anyone. Now that I can, I won't hold back, you realize that, right? You might as well get used to it.” As the last word was breathed over the shell of his ear, Alois nibbled playfully at the lobe, causing Ciel’s breath to come out hitched. The smaller male gradually began to lose his composure; he could feel how every tiny cell in his body vibrated as Alois traced his fingers over his chest and blew hot air into his ear.  
  
“Uhm… do you want me to leave?” Finny chuckled, so overly amused that Ciel immediately came back to reality and shot him the most threatening glare he could conjure.  
  
“No! We’re not—you-"  
  
“You’re so stuck up, Ciel," Finny interrupted. "Remember how I was when I first started dating Mey? Just let it loose – I don’t mind. Just don’t have sex in front of me, that’s all I ask.”  
  
“Wha-“ Ciel started objecting but Alois swiftly cut him off.  
  
“If you don’t want that, then maybe you _should_ leave,” the blonde purred, giving Finny a wide grin before he once again used his teeth on Ciel’s earlobe.  
  
Ciel was fuming, but before he could get any words out, Finny let out a heartfelt laugh and rose to his feet.  
  
“Say no more. I’ll be back later tonight. By the way, that party you mentioned a couple of days ago, when was it again?”  
  
“We’re not-“ Ciel tried again but Alois only tightened his grip on him and muffled him by putting his hand over his mouth.  
  
“It’s not set in stone, but Hannah’s parents mentioned they'd be leaving town in three weeks, so hopefully then,” Alois explained in a calm tone, completely ignoring the struggling boy he was clinging to.  
  
“Alright, I’ll be there,” Finny chirped, complete amusement painting his features as he exited the room.  
  
The blonde finally loosened his hold on Ciel, removing the hand covering his mouth and breathing out an almost musical chuckle against his cheek. "You're cute when you're angry."  
  
“Why do you always have to embarrass me?!” The words came out sounding like a mix between a whine and a growl, and Ciel felt immensely frustrated. This was not at all how he had pictured this to play out.  
  
“Hey, don’t be like that. I’m just being me – the guy you like, remember?”  
  
Ciel groaned before he spat, “Can you let go of me?”  
  
Alois exhaled a deep sigh, raising a hand to rub his forehead before he released the other male. When Ciel turned around to face the blonde, he noticed how tired he looked, and even though there was a glimmer of happiness in his eyes, they were red and puffy and _sad_.  
  
“Alois…” Ciel said, barely above a whisper, forgetting all about his previous aggravation. He realized that he'd been inconsiderate and selfish, only caring about his own emotions. And in all the commotion Ciel had almost forgotten that Alois had been over at his father's house for two whole days.  
  
Ciel stood on his knees in front of the blonde, looking at him for a few seconds. His hands cupped Alois' cheeks, and it became apparent to him that he must have been through something terrible for him to look so exhausted.  
  
"Have you been crying?"  
  
"Don't worry about it, cutie. I'll be fine." Alois gave Ciel a smile, but it didn't reach his eyes.  
  
"You just came home from _that_ and I've been acting like a jerk... I'm so sorry."  
  
"Hey this is all new to you. I shouldn't tease you so much."  
  
Ciel couldn't avoid noticing how Alois had trouble meeting his eyes, as if he was struggling with something. He took a firmer grip on his face and forced him to look at him.  
  
"What did he do to you?"  
  
"Ciel, I..." Alois curled his fingers around Ciel's wrists and tried to remove his hands but he refused to let him go. "He didn't do anything bad, okay? Don't worry your pretty little head," the blonde assured with a small curve of his lips.  
  
"Your eyes can't lie to me. Haven't you realized that by now?" Ciel swallowed. The more he looked into the other’s gloomy orbs, the more miserable he seemed. With a sudden rush of emotions, Ciel tangled his fingers in Alois' silky strands and pressed the blonde’s head against his chest.  
  
“Ciel, what are you-“  
  
“What happened?” Ciel choked out, burying his face in Alois’ messy hair. He held him tight and was determined not to let him go, even if he were to protest. Ciel was surprised when the blonde simply went limp in his embrace, raising two shivering hands to clutch his t-shirt.  
  
"I-I can't...I can't talk about it...I'm..."  
  
"It's okay, take your time."  
  
The blonde held onto Ciel's shirt as his hair was stroked, and he accepted the comfort surprisingly well. A few minutes of silence passed before Alois started trembling, and Ciel felt how the fabric between him and the blonde’s cheek became damp.  
  
“Alois…” Ciel whispered once again, tightening his hold even more and the blonde completely fell apart, sobbing desperately, clinging to Ciel with all his might.  
  
A sensation resembling panic began filling Ciel, racing like stinging bolts of lightning through his limbs. He wanted to do something, anything, to take this pain away from Alois. It was almost unbearable to have to listen to his tormented sounds, unable to relieve him of the mental wounds that caused him to make them. Ciel could feel a lump burning in his throat and he felt so utterly helpless; he felt like there was nothing he could do. Not until he knew the truth that was.  
  
When Alois’ whimpers began to fade some, Ciel cautiously murmured, “Tell me… You have to tell me.”  
  
The blonde held onto him for a couple more seconds before he glanced up at Ciel with watery eyes. “It’s too c-complicated, Ciel. Y-you can’t do anything about it e-even if I did tell you,” he whimpered before he titled his head down and fell down on the sheets. Ciel quickly lay down beside him, pressing his frame against his back and fiddling with his hair.  
  
“You don’t know that. You know I'll have to do something if you don’t tell me why I shouldn’t. There's no way I can just sit by and let him hurt you. Please, just tell me.”  
  
Alois released a deep sigh before rolling around onto his back and meeting Ciel’s gaze with eyes as pale as dust. “Luka…” he started in a shaky voice, swallowing several times before he managed to go on. “If you do something… If I stop going there…” He trailed off, but Ciel understood perfectly what he was trying to say.  
  
“But we could get him locked up! He wouldn’t be able to hurt anyone from the inside of a cell.”  
  
“Yes he would… And even if someone did manage to put him behind bars for what he does to me, he would still get out at some point. I just can’t risk it. I've gone through it in my head a hundred times, Ciel. I’m just waiting for Luka to turn eighteen so that I can take him away from there. It’s the only solution.”  
  
“That can’t be true! We’ll figure it out. Can’t we talk to someone on the police force? I mean, they have witness protection and all of that.”  
  
“No, it’s impossible. Do you have any idea what could happen if he just gets a minor sentence? I can't risk pressing charges – I just can't!"  
  
"But we have to do something!"  
  
"I _am_ doing something!"  
  
"But you can't do that! You can't keep going there for the next eight years."  
  
"I can...and I will." Alois bore his eyes into Ciel, the sky blue orbs burning with a fire that made the smaller male want to look away. "Don't try and stop me. I won't let you – not in a million years. I know it'll keep my dad satisfied and Luka will be safe from harm. I can manage."  
  
"No...you know I can't do that."  
  
"CIEL, YOU HAVE TO!"

“But-“

“No. Just leave it alone.”  
  
While Alois moved a hand to wipe the tears from his swollen eyes, Ciel could only stare at the ceiling, feeling himself getting drained of all hope of helping Alois he had left. A few far-fetched ideas kept swishing through his mind, none of them really good enough to mention. Frustration quickly overtook him and he wanted to bang his fist against the wall, or simply just go over to Alois’ father and beat the living hell out him for all he’d done and would keep on doing if they didn’t stop it.  
  
“Ciel…” Alois murmured in a small voice, still a bit shaky from his earlier emotional outburst. “Let’s just let this be for now, okay?”  
  
“How can you expect me to do that?!” Ciel almost spat the words into the thick air surrounding him, feeling trapped by Alois’ earlier revelations. He wanted a solution and he wanted it now. “I care too much about you to just sit by and do nothing!”  
  
Soft fingers curled around Ciel’s hand as the blonde turned to face him with his entire front. “Look, I’ll agree to let you ponder on this if you want to, but like I said; I’ve gone through this in my mind so many times and I can’t find a better solution.”  
  
Ciel sighed in defeat. He knew that Alois wouldn't back down, but he didn’t want to accept it. Though after a few moments he eventually had to realize that the blonde was right. This needed to be thought over carefully, and that’s exactly what Ciel decided to do.  
  
“Okay. I’ll agree to let this go for now, but we'll come up with a better solution. I will figure this whole mess out if it’s the last fucking thing I do.”  
  
Alois let out a faint laugh, sad and broken, but filled with gratitude. “Thank you. I had no idea you felt so strongly about me.”  
  
Ciel’s eyes widened as he instinctively scrambled to get some distance between him and the blonde. But with his bed being quite narrow, he couldn’t get far. “W-what do you mean? I didn’t say-“  
  
“Oh, just relax. I feel that way for you, too. But you already knew that, right? I’m not very good at hiding my emotions.”  
  
Of course Ciel knew that Alois had strong feelings for him. He had both said it and showed him on multiple occasions. “Yes, I know you do... But I-“  
  
“Ciel, you don’t have to tell me how you feel about me. It’s pretty obvious. Was this what Finny threatened to tell me?”  
  
Ciel couldn’t get his tongue to move. Every fiber in his body was screaming at him that he should barge out of the door and run away. For Ciel, speaking about his emotions was close to terrifying.  
  
“I take your silence as a yes.” Alois chuckled and placed a small kiss on Ciel’s cheek. “I’ve been meaning to ask you something…”  
  
“What?” Ciel blurted out, still uncomfortable but oddly curious as he turned his head to face the blonde.  
  
“Now that everybody knows about us… can I call you my boyfriend?”  
  
The air flew out of Ciel’s lungs.  
  
There it was; the _thing_. The words were spoken. It was out in the open; the dreaded matter that Ciel had known he would have to face at some point, but never really been able to prepare himself for fully. This wonderful person beside him was now waiting for an answer, but Ciel didn’t know if he could utter the words to make it official. He wasn’t sure if he would ever be ready for thinking about himself as someone with a boyfriend.  
  
The only thing he was absolutely certain of was that this beautiful creature was his entire world now. Only a little over a month had flown by since that first night where Ciel had gone to Alois and kissed him. But so much had happened between them, both before and after.  
  
_I...can't do this, I..._  
  
Ciel took a deep breath.  
  
_What the fuck am I even thinking about?_    
  
_I'm in love with him._  
  
Ciel couldn’t deny his feelings any more than he could keep himself from whispering, “ _Yes_.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh and thanks for the asks on tumblr. They make me smile.


	21. Chapter 21

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's only a few chapters left! Yay! Love you guys! Thanks for all your lovely comments on the last chapter :3

Three weeks had passed since the day Alois and Ciel proclaimed themselves as boyfriends. As suspected, no one had been surprised by the news. And to Ciel’s great relief, he didn’t seem to have as big a problem with his new relationship status as he initially thought he would. It was surprisingly easy to deal with the looks they got whenever Alois attacked him with kisses in the halls or held his hand in public.

The only problem was Claude.

He had been quiet for far too long and both Alois and Ciel knew something was to come. The raven-haired male had been so certain that he had Alois wrapped around his little finger. And now, when practically everyone on campus knew about the new couple, there was no way he hadn’t heard.

Alois mostly ignored his calls, but occasionally spent time with his ex whenever Ciel was busy with other things. Ciel had no real say in the matter, but the whole thing made him extremely uncomfortable. He despised the guy with all his might, but Alois had made it abundantly clear that Claude would continue to be a part of his life, whether Ciel liked it or not.

And Ciel hated it.

Unfortunately, he had to endure. Ciel wasn’t the kind of person who would keep their partner from doing what they chose to do. But Claude had him sick to his stomach, and he cared enough about Alois to be bothered. He had hit him, probably more than once, and made Alois feel like he was worth less than dirt. Ciel had tried to get more details, but the blonde always avoided the subject whenever he brought it up.

Alois acted like everything was fine and dandy, and the fact that he had at least two abusive people in his life was something the blonde seemed to do his best to ignore. He even went to both of them practically willingly. Ciel had tried discussing it with him on multiple occasions but the older male always got angry and they ended up fighting.

The whole endeavor had forced Ciel to take matters into his own hands, trying his best to find a solution. But every time he had somewhat of a plan, the blonde found a way to shoot him down.

“Will you stop being so boring?” Alois whined beside Ciel on the same beige couch where they had held hands for the first time. Hannah’s parents had finally left town again, allowing Alois to throw another party at her house. “You’ve been sitting there, just staring at the wall for half an hour now. Here – drink.” The blonde handed Ciel his beer and glared at him in annoyance.

“Uh sure." Ciel sighed as he shifted on the couch. "Sorry, I just have a lot on my mind.”

“So I’ve noticed,” Alois muttered before gulping down half his drink in one sweep.

“My humblest apologies, Your Highness,” Ciel snarled, spitefully taking a sip from the lukewarm beer. “I’ll do my best to serve and please.”

“You should watch that pretty little mouth of yours.”

Ciel let out a snort.

“What have you been so preoccupied with these past weeks anyways?” Alois spat. “You’ve been so fucking distant. I’m starting to wonder if you even want to be around me anymore. Maybe this fucking relationship’s just a big mistake to you and you’re just waiting to come up with a way to get out.”

Ciel raised his eyebrows and whipped his head around to face his boyfriend. “What? Are you serious?"

“Yes! You’ve been acting weird since day one. Do you want to get out? Just tell me – it’s not like I’m not used to it… I’m never more than a booty call. That’s what I’ve always been and I wouldn’t blame you if-“

“Shut up! You know that’s not true!”

Fighting like this had started to become a normal thing for the pair ever since Alois had told Ciel about his father. The blonde didn't seem to want the abuse to end, while Ciel did everything to find a stop to it. And by now it had begun to take a toll on their relationship.

The blonde looked away, a little embarrassed by his own behavior. “How am I supposed to know? It’s not like you’ve been paying much attention to me-“

Alois was once again hindered from finishing his sentence when Ciel smashed their lips together in a brief, yet rough kiss.

“Just stop. I don’t want to hear you say another degrading thing about yourself, you hear me? I gave up everything to be here with you, you idiot. You think I would just make it all undone? That would be a fucking waste of energy, wouldn’t you agree?” Ciel barked, but the harshness in his tone had no effect on Alois, who lit up like a lantern and sparkled just like he was supposed to. Just like Ciel wanted him to.

The blonde didn’t say another word; instead he crawled on top of Ciel in an instant, wrapping his arms around the younger boy’s neck. A short moment later he slid his raspberry tasting tongue into Ciel’s mouth with gratefulness and passion influencing his every movement and touch.

“The two lovers are at it again,” Timber muttered as he walked passed the pair with a petite brunette at his heel, causing Ciel to break the kiss and shove Alois off of him.

“That’s enough,” Ciel mumbled, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand.

“Nooo, don’t let me stop you from sucking each other off in front of everyone,” Timber sneered, clutching the backrest with a strong hand. “It’s not like I haven’t heard or seen you two before. I almost feel as if I have my own personal live porno in my room. It would be a shame if I didn’t share that enjoyable show with everyone else.”

“Shut your trap, you fucking dork. You’re embarrassing Ciel,” Alois hissed, but was unable to hide a small, amused smile from creeping its way onto his lips.

“No, by all means, continue to blurt out all the intimate details about our relationship to everyone here. I’m sure everyone would like to know exactly how much action we’re getting, and just how little action _you’re_ getting, Timber,” Ciel retorted, smirking maliciously. “One might begin to wonder if you’re jealous.”

Alois started laughing so hard that he fell off the couch, the sound so bubbly and joyful that everyone around them joined in. The blonde was rolling around on the carpet, hugging his stomach with tears in his eyes.

"Holy shit. I never thought I'd hear you say something like that," he whimpered as he turned his gaze to Timber, satisfied to see amusement on his face. After the commotion, Timber didn’t bother to snap back. Instead he strolled over to one of the chairs around the coffee table as his female friend made herself comfortable next to Ciel on the couch.

The room once again filled with friendly chatter and the clinking of glass. The house music in the background was just low enough for them to keep a conversation without yelling, but loud enough for a dozen students to use the free space of the living room as a dance floor.

Alois stayed on the carpet after his laughing fit, lying on his back with his legs in a wide V. His light strands of hair fanned out around his face like a gloria, keeping Ciel's eyes locked on his beautiful angel of a boyfriend. His tight baby blue t-shirt was snug around his torso, just as his dark denim shorts were around his bum. One might think the two had matched, since Ciel wore a blue button-up shirt and black jeans.

“Alois, you better come back here," the girl next to Ciel suddenly purred, playing with a strand of her long, brown hair in a flirting manner. "Or else I might steal your handsome boyfriend away.”

Alois didn’t pay any attention to what she was saying as he was lying flat on his back, completely lost in his phone. Ciel hadn't even heard her words as he was busy conversing with Timber.

“Timber, I have to show you something!” the blonde suddenly called out in excitement, arching his back to meet the purple-haired boy’s gaze.

“Sure,” Timber muttered in an exasperated tone as he rolled his eyes from Ciel to Alois. “Can we take it in the kitchen? I need to mix another drink, and by the looks of it, so do you.” He glanced over at the blonde's nearly empty glass with a nod of his head.

“Yeah, okay,” Alois agreed before getting to his feet. “Let’s go.”

The two of them grabbed their glasses and walked away, leaving Ciel alone with the brunette.

“So, how do you know Timber?” Ciel asked casually, not really interested in speaking with her, but felt the need to say something to break the awkward silence.

“He’s my cousin,” she explained, releasing a sigh while mindlessly fidgeting with the purple ribbons of her white top. “So how’s it going with Alois? I heard you’re not really gay.” Green eyes sparked with mischief and curiosity as she lifted her head to focus on Ciel.

“Don’t you think that’s a little inappropriate to say to someone you’ve just met?” Ciel asked with a frown.

“Why? I’m just curious. I’ve heard all about that blonde girl and how Alois snatched you away from her. Poor thing.”

“Hey… that’s not true. Well… not entirely.”

“Do you still like girls?”

“My sexual preferences are none of your business.”

“I’ve actually been betting with my friends that I can make you come over to our team again.”

“You did what?! I don't even know you!"

“We all find you cute… It’s such a shame to see you go gay all of a sudden. Don’t you miss boobs?” She let her hands slide over her breasts, cupping them before squeezing down and pushing them up to create a cleavage.

“What are you-“

With a lopsided smile, she snatched his hand and placed it where hers had been only a second prior. Ciel had no time to react before a familiar voice came from behind him.

“Oh, that’s just beautiful,” Alois mocked from across the room, slowly clapping his hands. Timber walked closely behind him with two drinks in his hands, dark eyebrows lifting as he caught sight of what his cousin was doing.

“Ciel, why are you touching that girl’s boob?” Finny asked in a surprised tone, conveniently returning from the dance floor with Mey-Rin just in time witness the odd scene.

Ciel quickly retracted his hand, his face reddening faster than a speeding bullet. “She… Her friends…” he tried, but the words wouldn’t come out the way he wanted them to.

The girl giggled and scooched over to make room on the couch. “I was just doing a little experiment. Are you upset, Alois?”

“Ciel is _mine_ ,” he proclaimed as he sauntered over to them with a peculiar smirk on his lips. Before Ciel could figure out what he was up to, the blonde leaned down and cupped his soft bulge, squeezing down and giggling like a child. “Guess your little experiment didn’t work."

Slender fingers curled around a frail wrist as Ciel tried to pry his boyfriend's hand off of him. "Alois! sto-"

"It would be fun to hurt you for touching my Ciel," Alois bore his eyes into the girl, giving her a look that was dark enough to render anyone terrified, " _but_ … since he wouldn’t like that, I’ll settle with showing you just how little you got on me.”

“What are you going on about?” Ciel barked, still trying to get Alois’ hand away from his crotch. “It was nothing. And get your hand off my junk already!”

“What're you going to do?” the girl and Finny asked in unison.

As Alois climbed on top of Ciel to straddle him, he pressed his palm against the girl’s face, pushing her away in the rudest way possible. Her protest came out muffled but both Ciel and the blonde completely ignored her as their eyes met. Cotton clad thighs pressed against the younger’s sides as Alois leaned in to flick his tongue over Ciel’s lips, the action so slow and alluring that both their minds turned to lewd things in an instant.

How the blonde had such power over Ciel was beyond his understanding, but he had stopped fighting it weeks ago. There was no use, since those piercing blue eyes trapped him time and time again and made his bones grow weak in under two seconds.

Thin arms folded around a slim waist as Ciel pulled his boyfriend as close as he could get, ignoring every prying stare. With torsos pressed together, and noses touching, they breathed all over each other’s lips. The girl on the side of them did nothing but glare, but none of them noticed the sparks of agitation she was sending their way. Just as Alois pushed his tongue past Ciel’s parted lips, a deep voice ruined their intense moment.

“That’s the most disturbing thing I’ve ever seen.”

Both males snapped their heads to the side, eyes immediately switching from sultry to surprised.

“Claude,” Alois gasped out, hands falling from Ciel as he studied the slender form standing in the doorway. “I thought you were hanging out with your friends tonight.”

“I was, but then I heard about this party. Why didn’t you tell me about it, hm?” Claude looked menacing dressed in all black, tall enough to make them both look like children. “I also heard a rumor about you two going steady, but I wasn’t sure until now. I have to wonder why you would hide something like that from me, Alois.”

“I-I just…I didn’t-“

“You didn’t want me here, did you?” Claude narrowed his eyes and folded his arms over his chest. “I can see why. You didn’t want me to interrupt you as you disgust everyone with your sluttiness. You never change.”

“What the fuck are you talking about?” Ciel snapped, teeth clenching as he pushed his boyfriend off of him. He was just about to stand up when Claude took a couple of threatening steps towards the couch.

“Alois plays with little boys like you all the time. He has his little fun and then he comes back to me. That’s what always happens. It will happen this time, too.”

Everyone in the room was silently watching the three males, the air thick and every word foreboding. Alois was sitting on his knees beside Ciel, balling his hands into fists atop his thighs.

“Can we talk? _In private_ ,” the blonde hissed. He was trying to sound confident but Ciel could hear the slight tremble in his voice.

Claude let out a snort, but it was soon followed by a tiny smirk. “You want to be alone with me? Of course you do.”

Ciel wanted to trust Alois, but a part of him was still nervous about leaving him alone with his ex. For all he knew, Claude was right; Alois might eventually leave him to go back to him. He swallowed, anxiety creeping its way into every corner of his small body.

“I don’t think-“ Ciel started objecting, but his boyfriend was as determined as always.

“Stop looking so smug, Claude. I just want to talk.”

“That’s what you always say. Does your boyfriend know how many times you’ve been at my apartment the past month?”

With furrowed brows, Ciel turned to Alois, his frail throat bobbing as he awaited his response.

“I’ve told you about every single one of those times, babe,” the blonde assured him before he rose to his feet and strolled over to Claude. With a glance over his shoulder, he added, “Wait here. I won’t be long.”

Ciel only nodded.

* * *

“Why the fuck would you say that?” Alois spat, standing in front of Claude in Hannah's tiny kitchen.

“It’s been months since I had my hands on you… It’s about time you got rid of that dork.” The raven-haired male’s expression was close to seductive as he trailed a finger down the blonde’s chest. “I miss you.”

“I've told you like a thousand times that I don’t want you anymore!” Alois shoved the other away with the palms of his hands, glaring at him with all the spite he could conjure.

“You don’t know what you’re talking about. You’re confused... But I get it.” With a lick to his lips, Claude sauntered towards the blonde, who backed up against the cabinets. “It must be nice getting validated by a straight boy.”

Alois was breathing heavily, his lungs expanding wider the closer the other male got. Lids fell over blue orbs as Claude’s fingers wrapped around the blonde’s waist, giving the flesh a light squeeze.

“P-please stop. I don’t want this.”

“That’s a lie, and we both know it,” Claude breathed over the blonde’s neck, lips grazing over his throbbing pulse.

Shivering hands grabbed the counter so hard that Alois’ knuckles turned white, but he didn’t move away. “Clau-“

“Shh… You’re mine. And I’ll do whatever I want with you. If you refuse, who knows what’ll happen to your precious little toy?”

With eyes squeezed shut, the blonde released the deep breath he had been holding. Claude was speaking straight into Alois’ ear now, and pressed down even harder on his waist just to show him who was in command.

“You wouldn’t,” the blonde whispered, his brain working overtime to resist the other’s advances.

“I’m sick of your little games, Alois. I’ll do what’s necessary to make you come to your senses. You really think he likes you? He’ll get sick of you, just like everyone else. And who will be there to comfort you? Who is always there? _Me_.” The last word was followed by a wet kiss to the blonde’s earlobe, causing Alois to shiver from head to toe.

“You-you’re wrong.”

“Am I? Just look at how-“

“What the hell is going on here?” Ciel mouth was wide open as he stared at the two males from the doorway.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just wanted to tell you guys that I posted a cielois one shot a few weeks ago. It's called Treehouse.
> 
> Don't forget to give kudos :3


	22. Chapter 22

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you my darlings, for being so wonderful.
> 
> The song in this chapter is Lifehouse - You And Me.

"Ciel!" Alois jumped against the broad chest pressing into him as he gasped out his boyfriend's name. "This is not _at all_ what it looks like, I swear!"

Claude did nothing but turn his head as Alois huffed and struggled against his hold. Pitch black tendrils of hair were pristinely styled and spotless glasses glistened in the scarce lighting as Claude's lips twitched in satisfaction.

"Oh if it isn't the _boyfriend_. Just run along. Skip away. We're busy." Claude leaned in to connect his mouth with the creamy skin of Alois' neck, when a resolute palm found his jaw and tried to push him away.

"Stop it, Claude!" Alois complained, wiggling like a fish on land, but the taller male managed to keep the blonde in his clutches as he breathed out a muted laugh over his throat.

Ciel was fuming as he stomped over to the pair, grabbing Claude's collar and yanking so hard that the male had to take a stumbling step back.

"Didn't you hear him?! He told you to stop!" Ciel shouted, narrow eyes pinning the older male as he gazed up at his annoyed face.

" _Don't_ tell me what to do," Claude spat, his pearly whites on display as a thin lip lifted. He felt no fear as he stepped towards Ciel, looking both ready and eager to get physical.

Despite the mere size of the male and the threatening glare he was giving him, Ciel stood unwavering. "I'll tell you whatever the fuck I want, you...you big ass tree! You will _not_ touch my boyfriend. Understood?"

"What's your tiny ass going to do, hm?"

"I don't fucking care if you hit me, you abusive FUCK! I'll do-"

"Ciel, just let me handle this!" Alois' light voice sliced through the tension like a hot knife through butter. Ciel's head whipped in his direction as the blonde eased himself between the stiff bodies to cup his boyfriend's cheeks. "I want to talk to Claude alone. That's why I said I'll be back."

"You heard him," Claude sassed. "He doesn't want you here."

Ciel ignored him, focusing all his attention on Alois. "He was touching you!"

"Claude is just... I said I'll handle it! I don't need your help."

Ciel couldn't believe what he was hearing. It was impossible for him to understand how Alois could be so calm after being fondled by _Claude,_ out of all people. But if the blonde wanted to let his ex treat him like his property and send away the only person that tried to stop it, Ciel wouldn't stand in his way.

"So you don't need my help?" Ciel snapped, sucking in a deep breath through his nose. "Okay. Fine. Have fun with your ex-boyfriend. I'm going back to campus." He turned on his heel, seething with anger as he walked out of the kitchen to grab his shoes and jacket.

"No, I mean—Ciel, stop!" Alois turned his head to Claude, eyebrows bunched together in a frown. "Look what you've done! Why can't you just accept that I don't want you anymore?!"

"You don't know what you're saying, baby. Just wait-"

"Don't start again! You've ruined everything!"

"Calm down. We both knew this was going to happen. Let's go to my place, I have a surprise for you." Claude moved closer to the blonde, darting his tongue out to lick his lips.

Alois scowled. "I don't want it. Either you accept that I'm with Ciel now or I'll never talk to you again!"

"Hey, that's a little harsh, don't you think? Let's just take my car and end the night at my place, okay? Chill on the couch and drink some wine. Like we used to do before that brat came along." A large hand reached out for the blonde's cheek as Claude's lips curled into a smirk. "And you can put on that little pink dress I bought you."

"No!" A loud smack echoed throughout the room just as Claude's fingers reached Alois' chin. "Don't touch me!"

The taller male touched his slapped cheek as he stared down at his ex-boyfriend in disbelief. "You hit me."

"Yeah! Cause you never fucking listen! If you still want me in your life, you know what to do." Alois was devastated as he walked across the room, mumbling, "I have to go find Ciel."

The blonde felt as if he had lost two people in his life in the course of ten minutes. Ciel might never talk to him again, and it was all caused by his own stupidity. And Claude would probably never accept his new boyfriend, no matter how much time passed.

As Alois got dressed and took the bus back to campus all he could think about was how Ciel could ever love a mess like him.

* * *

Ciel fell down on his own bed, shoes and jacket still on and dirtying his sheets. He kept imagining what Alois and Claude might be up to at Hannah's place. He wondered if they'd left to spend the night at Claude's. Every second that passed had the thoughts growing more and more horrid. It was a wonder he was able to withstand it without punching the wall or smashing something to bits.

Ciel wasn't sure how long he would be able to keep this up. Even if Alois and Claude were over, as the blonde claimed, Ciel didn't think he could stand watching his boyfriend get treated like that much longer.

Just as Ciel sat up to remove his shoes, he noticed how the door handle was pressed down and half a second later Alois stormed into his dorm.

"Ciel!" The blonde flew across the room and embraced his shocked boyfriend, who fell back on the bed with a grunt.

"Alois, get off of me! I can't breathe!"

"Oh, sorry," Alois murmured as he released Ciel and moved to sit on the edge, revealing his swollen eyes and messy hair.

"Have you been crying?" Ciel asked as he sat up, lifting a careful hand to brush soft fingertips over a red cheek. His previous thoughts were forgotten as soon as he noticed the blonde's rueful expression, but the hint of excitement behind his droopy lids had Ciel bewildered.

"I just..." Alois seized Ciel wrist in a light grip as he turned his head away. "I'm so sorry. I slapped him, Ciel. I slapped him."

Surprised eyebrows arched as Ciel realized how big of an action this was for Alois. "You... slapped him?" he repeated, giving the blonde a proud smile. "That's pretty badass. Did he touch you?" Ciel's face turned dark the second the words fled his lips.

"He tried to. He wouldn't listen! And I was stupid to think that he would. I'm sorry for being such a bitch."

"Stop apologizing. I understand why you did what you did. But I need to know," Ciel said in a low voice, muscles tensing as he gave Alois a grave look, "will you stop talking to him now?"

The blonde blinked even though he had known the question would come up at some point. "I... I think so."

"You can't be serious? After all he's done? He's not good for you! He will continue hurting you until you completely forget who you are. Isn't it enough you have your father for that?"

Alois buried his face in his hands, trembling as he mumbled, "Please stop screaming—I'm sorry, I'm sorry... I can't help it... I can't-"

Ciel cursed himself for his insensitivity, curling lean fingers into a fist and bumping his forehead. "No, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to get so upset. I'm just so worried about you." He took the blonde's face in his hands, lifting his head as he commanded, "Look at me."

Alois peered between his fingers, laying eyes on his concerned boyfriend before slowly removing his hands from his face. With a sigh he leaned in and pecked Ciel's forehead.

"It's hard for me. But I promise I'll do my best to stay away from Claude from now on, okay?"

"I just want you to be happy."

"I know that, babe." Alois reached for Ciel's shoes with a tiny smile on his lips. "And _you_ make me really happy, so can I stay here tonight?"

"Only if you give me those Twizzlers I know you're hiding in your jacket.

Alois laughed as he pulled Ciel's shoes off, immediately opening his jacket when he was done. "We're gonna have to do something about that sweet-tooth of yours."

* * *

_One month later._

"Do these shorts go with this top?" Alois gazed down at his outfit before raising his head with a questioning look on his face.

"How should I know?" Ciel replied from his place on the edge of the blonde's bed. "Last time I checked I wasn't a fashion coordinator for girls."

Uncontrollable laughter filled the room as Alois bent over, clutching his stomach. Ciel had no way to keep himself from smiling at his boyfriend's reaction to his comment - he meant every word though. Alois did dress like a girl most of the time. And this time he had chosen small denim shorts and a purple tank top.

"You like how I dress… I know you do," Alois purred before turning around, leaning forward and clutching his ass with one hand. Looking back at Ciel he wiggled his lower half and dragged his tongue along his upper lip with a playful glint in his big eyes.

"Dear lord," Ciel exclaimed, teasing Alois by rolling his eyes. "If that's true, maybe you should get your ass over here? You're practically begging for it in those small shorts."

Alois immediately stood up straight with a thoroughly surprised look on his face. "Where'd my boyfriend go? Those words are not yours, little Phantomhive."

"Just shut up and come here."

With his lower lip in a firm grip between his teeth, Alois sauntered over to Ciel and crawled on top of him to straddle him. A usually proud mouth displayed a tiny smirk as Ciel let his hands slide over the blonde's thighs. Alois exhaled a contented sigh as they ended up on his denim-clad backside to squeeze the plump flesh there.

"What's up with you today? You're being flirty… and you're fondling me." Alois chuckled, nuzzling his face in Ciel's wet hair, inhaling the scent of his shampoo.

Ciel shrugged. "I don't know… I just feel happier than usual." It was true, he did feel more joyful, but if anyone would have asked him why, he wouldn't have had an answer to give.

"Me too," Alois admitted just as a new song started playing from his phone.

"What song is this?" Ciel asked, listening with interest to the familiar tunes. "I've heard it before."

"It's called 'You And Me.' Do you like it?"

"Yes… It makes me think."

With a small smile Alois got down from Ciel and stood in front of him, holding out his hand. "Dance with me?"

Ciel swallowed. "Dance?"

Alois grabbed his hand and pulled him up from the bed, embracing him before he had time to complain.

"Yes, Ciel. Dance with me," Alois whispered into Ciel's damp locks before he took his wrists, leisurely placing the smaller male's arms around his neck. Alois rested his hands on Ciel's waist, looking into his eyes as he started moving his feet, and Ciel hesitantly moved with him. The blonde pressed them closer together, carefully stepping around to the rhythm of the song as Ciel's heartbeat sped up.

Ciel was nervous. He couldn't dance even if his life depended on it, but he didn't want to disappoint Alois. With a body stiff as a board, he did his best to follow the blonde's slow, simple movements, resisting the urge to look down at his feet.

Alois kept staring into his boyfriend's engrossing, mismatched eyes, feeling rush after rush of emotions run through him. They were so close... so happy.

Alois had managed to stay away from Claude for an entire month. He felt free, liberated. He knew all he needed was Ciel, and eliminating that dark presence from his life had been exactly what he needed. And now...

All he wanted was to tell Ciel how much he loved him.

Alois knew it was too soon to say such a thing to him at this early stage in their relationship, but he still felt it. He felt all of it, every waking minute of every day. He didn't know if what he felt was actually love, but whatever it was, it was the strongest emotion he had experienced in his entire life.

Every time Alois met Ciel's gaze, he got an immediate urge to say those three feared words. He wanted Ciel to know how he felt for him, but he was terrified that he might scare him away if he did. It had been so difficult for Ciel to even admit he had feelings for him and Alois was sure he would run for the hills in two seconds if their relationship got too serious too fast.

As the blonde moved his feet around, with Ciel's arms folded around his neck, he almost felt as if the world disappeared around them. His whole inner being vibrated as he looked down at those pink cheeks and pursed lips, and felt the unsteadiness in the younger male's steps as he tried to follow, determined not to crush his toes. It was endearing, how far Ciel would step out of his comfort zone to make him happy.

_All of the things that I want to say,_  
_just aren't coming out right._  
_I'm tripping on words; you got my head spinning._  
_I don't know where to go from here._  
  
The warmth and feel of the body pressing tightly against him finally got to Ciel, and he forgot all about his uneasiness in an instant. This day, this song, this person… It all seemed to mix into one huge pile of exploding emotions and there was nothing else he could focus on except for the gorgeous creature staring down at him with that unusual glow in his eyes.

_He's so beautiful… and he's… mine._

The words of the song were filling Ciel up as if they were sung to them, and the last sentence of the refrain explained exactly how he felt at that very moment.

_Cause it's you and me and all of the people with nothing to do; nothing to lose.  
And it's you and me and all of the people..._

_And I don't know why I can't keep my eyes off of you._

This was a moment in which they got enchanted, ensnared, trapped by the other; moving together harmoniously, experiencing every emotion to the fullest, right out to the very tips of their fingers.

In the very same second, they both closed their eyes and caught each other's lips.

Their surroundings slipped away as ravenous tongues found each other in a kiss so passionate it took both of their breaths away. It was as if their bodies and minds melted together into one. Nothing had ever felt more right.

Ciel pulled away, gasping. "A-Alois…"

The blonde smiled, stroking his boyfriend's cheek with a delicate thumb. "Is something wrong?"

"N-no but…" Ciel averted his gaze, trying to hide his reddening cheeks from the piercing eyes looking down at him.

Alois leaned in, placing a chaste kiss to the corner of Ciel's mouth before he embraced him in a tight hug.

The blonde couldn't bear watching his boyfriend struggle with his words, even though all he wanted was to hear them. His entire entity was blazing with the desire to hear what Ciel was thinking, but he had to suppress his inconvenient traits for the sake of Ciel's needs. He knew that he would tell him whatever he wanted to say when he was ready, because he always did find his words at some point, so long as Alois kept his own curious tongue at bay and didn't pressure him.

The blonde had gone through major changes with Ciel. The younger male had made him calmer, more gathered. His flamboyancy and need for attention had been toned down, for when Ciel was close to him, he could finally feel as if he was a complete human being. He was real. He was there. And Alois didn't feel nearly as much of the numbing ache that hid within him. It had once been such a large part of him that he actually had started to believe that he _was_ that pain.

But he was more; he could feel other things. Ciel finally made him believe that he actually... existed.

He was Alois Trancy; a person. He wasn't just a mess of uncontrollable urges, flimsy whims and deep scars; he was a young man with emotions. It might even be possible for him to feel love for someone other than his brother.

Love.

He loved Ciel.

As Alois inhaled the calming scent of flowery yet boyishly manly soap, as well as the personal fragrance of Ciel himself, he knew for certain.

"You've been my boyfriend for two months now. How does it feel?" the blonde suddenly found himself asking the male nuzzling his chest.

Ciel snapped open one blue and one purple eye, hesitating for all but two seconds until he answered, "It feels… better."

"Better?" Alois repeated with a frown, pushing Ciel away from him to try and read his expression.

"I mean… it feels right," Ciel explained, raising himself on his toes to reach his boyfriend's lips in a sweet kiss.

Alois' heart was swelling in his chest as butterflies fluttered their wings inside of him, and he felt so content and happy. The moment was perfect...

Right up until his phone began buzzing on the desk.

* * *

"Alois, where the fuck are you?!" Ciel shouted at his phone, leaving the blonde the third voice message of the day.

Alois seemed to have disappeared from the surface of the earth after he got that phone call the other day. Ciel was both worried and annoyed. Annoyed that the blonde hadn't told him where he was going and worried that something bad might have happened to him.

Ciel decided to try and call Hannah. She usually knew exactly where Alois was; despite how he sometimes treated her, she was his closest friend.

"Hi, Hannah? It's Ciel."

"Oh, hi Ciel. What's up?" Hannah's soft voice was laced with something close to nervousness, which made Ciel's anxiety skyrocket.

"I think you know what's up. Alois is missing again."

"Hmm... That's odd."

"No, it's not odd! You know where he is, don't you? Just tell me he's okay."

"I... Ciel I don't kn-"

"Don't lie to me, Hannah."

Ciel heard a sigh on the other end. "Alois is fine."

"Is he at his father's place? Because that'd mean he's absolutely not _fine_."

"Ehm, no, not exactly."

"Where is he, then? Just tell me. I'll find out anyway - you know I will."

"He..." Hannah sighed again. "He's at Claude's."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry ~


	23. Chapter 23

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AHHH there are only two chapters left after this! I can't believe this story will be over soon.
> 
> Thank you for all the feedback and loving words. You guys are so great at cheering me up in the dark depressing winter.
> 
> Check out [this amazing fanart](http://touch-me-trancy.tumblr.com/image/136717012749) of idwtwy Ciel *_*

**Ciel** : _I know you're with Claude_  
  
Alois' stomach dropped at the sight of the text. He wanted to reply but he didn't know how to explain his situation in a way that Ciel would understand.  
  
It was midafternoon and the sky was covered by clouds, leaving a grey and dull feeling in the blonde's chest. He shifted on Claude's couch, glancing at the tall male sitting beside him.  
  
"I have to leave now, otherwise I'll be late," Alois said, mentally preparing to be yelled at.  
  
"Is this really how it it's going to be? Is this what you want?" Claude asked, leaning back against the backrest. His tone was oddly calm, but that feigned sweetness was nothing more than foreboding to the blonde. It frightened him because Claude had always been a sore loser – he would never let this go.  
  
"You've held me here for a 24 hours. I've kept my end of the deal. Now give me what I came for."  
  
As Alois watched his ex-boyfriend take in his words, he noticed how his whole body changed, all the way from his face to his feet. Claude's lips were void of color and pursed into a thin line; his black-clad torso was tense and his whole demeanor was screaming anger at the blonde, but he kept speaking with the same soft voice.  
  
"You were here, but you gave me nothing. You have barely left this couch since you got here. How is that 'keeping your end of the deal’”?  
  
"Let me read your fucking text for you. These are your exact words," Alois spat, reaching for the coffee table to grab his phone. " _Spend 24 hours at my place and you'll have anything you want._ "  
  
"You know exactly what I meant by that."  
  
"Fuck you. You asked for me to spend time with you, you didn't ask me to spread my legs for you. I did exactly what you asked me – now _give me_ what I came for."  
  
Claude snarled, but he still rose to his feet and headed over to a small bureau next to the front door. As he went through the middle drawer, he glanced over his shoulder at the blonde.  
  
"So we're really over? You're going to throw away everything we had just to be with a straight boy that'll leave you once he's done experimenting?"  
  
"Ciel would never do that." Even though Alois uttered the words, he wasn't entirely sure if he believed them. But he chose to trust Ciel, and even if he did leave him, he wouldn't go back to Claude. Alois finally knew what it was like to truly love someone, and he would rather be alone than to go back to a loveless and abusive relationship.  
  
"Whatever you say," Claude muttered, closing the drawer and turning around. "Here." He held out his hand, his eyes gleaming with something so putrid that it made Alois shiver.  
  
The blonde stood up, straightening his black sweatshirt before heading over to Claude. He took the small bag of pills that rested in his hand before giving the male a spiteful glare.  
  
"This is the last time I'll come here. I'll find someone else to give me these. I can't be friends with you if you keep trying to get inside my pants."  
  
"If that's what you want, I won't stop you."  
  
Alois frowned as unease spread throughout his lean form. The way Claude was acting was out of character – he was too calm about this. But Alois had to leave, so he had no time to find out what was going on in his ex-boyfriend's mind. The person who had called him when he was dancing with Ciel had been his father.  
  
Alois had kept it from Ciel because he didn't want to worry him. There was nothing he could do about it anyway. The blonde had to go there and he had to let his father do as he pleased, otherwise he would hurt Luka. That was their arrangement. Alois had only gone to Claude to fetch something that would dull his mind and make it easier. But Claude had demanded something in return and he had felt forced to comply – to some extent.  
  
Alois had known that Claude wanted sex or something similar with his demand. But the blonde had been determined to keep his ex’s hands as far away from him as possible. He would never betray Ciel. He would never betray someone he loved.  
  
And that was exactly why he did what his father wanted. Alois would never turn his back on his brother.

* * *

Ciel was furious. He cursed himself for ever trusting Alois. He even packed up all his boyfriend's things that had been left at his dorm. The cardboard box stood beside the door, and every trace that Alois had ever sat foot in there was stuffed inside.  
  
Ciel could have used his best friend right now, but unfortunately Finny was spending the day with Sebastian for some odd reason. In his loneliness, Ciel became completely irrational and conjured up the notion that Alois must be cheating on him. In his mind, there could be no other reason as to why the blonde chose to suddenly keep him uninformed and refused to return his calls.  
  
With a loud groan Ciel picked up his headphones and turned on the loudest, most obnoxious music he could find. He flopped down on his bed with unnecessary force, causing the springs to whine within the mattress. He needed a distraction from the vivid images of his boyfriend sharing a bed with Claude.

* * *

The fake leather of the plum bag strained as Alois filled it with the necessities to last him two days. His blue orbs wandered across the room as a sigh left him.   
  
Time to go.  
  
Slender fingers grasped the handle of the bag, keeping them there for a couple of seconds before the blonde picked it up. His white sneakers lifted reluctantly, moving him towards the door and away from his safe haven.  
  
Time for Alois to once again leave himself in the hands of his father.

* * *

Claude gazed down at the phone in his hand, the contact on display just one tap away from getting a call.  
  
Claude wasn't hesitating for Alois' sake - he wanted to make that call. The only thing keeping him from it was the possibility of him losing Alois forever.  
  
One long finger hovered over the call button, ready to press down but Claude let the seconds pass. His glasses gleamed in the dim light of his living room as he shifted on the couch.  
  
All it took for him to make up his mind was for one particular thought to enter his mind, and it was something he had always considered to be true.   
  
_Alois is mine._  
  
With that, he finally made his decision and lifted the device to his ear.  
  
"Hello, who is this?" a deep voice on the other end asked.  
  
"Hello Mr. Trancy. This is Claude Faustus."

* * *

Alois pushed the handle down and pulled the door open. The interior of the villa was the same as it always had been. Old paintings adorned the walls, left there by his late grandparents; old yet luxurious furniture in different shades of whites and browns had been brought in by his mother once upon a time. They were thoughtfully placed to make the rooms look as spacious as possible.  
  
Alois was home. But it couldn't really be called a home.  
  
The smell of something cooking on the stove filled his nose as he stepped inside, and it should have made him hungry but it was quite the opposite. He bent over, untying his shoes and stepping out of them before calling out.  
  
"Anybody ho-"  
  
"ALOIIIIIS!" Luka came flying through the hallway and threw his arms around his brother's waist. "I've missed you so, so much!"  
  
A bright smile found its way onto pale lips as the blonde ruffled Luka's auburn locks. "I've missed you, too. But it hasn't been that long, has it? It was only a week ago that I took you to that amusement park."  
  
"One week? It feels like a year."  
  
Alois chuckled and picked the ten year old up to give him a warm hug. Luka's small legs dangled in the air as he was squeezed, and the tiny body squirmed in the arms trapping him.  
  
"I can't breeeeathe!"  
  
"I don't care." The blonde held his brother tight for a few more seconds, burying his face in his soft strands and inhaling his familiar scent.  
  
After setting Luka down on the floor, Alois looked around for his father. "Where's dad?"  
  
Luka's happy expression turned frightened immediately. "He-he's out in the garage. He's really angry."  
  
The blonde wondered what could've made his father livid this time, and the concern for his own as well as his brother’s safety was making his heart beat faster. "Did something happen?"  
  
"His phone rang and after that he started yelling and throwing stuff. He never even finished dinner." Luka wrapped his petite fingers around his own arm, half hugging himself and unable to stay still.  
  
Alois crouched before the tiny form, cupping Luka's face with one of his palms. "It'll be alright. I'll finish dinner a little later, okay? I just gotta go out to the garage and find out what's up with dad."  
  
"B-but what if he-"  
  
"I'll be fine. Don't worry about me. Go play for a little while. I'll be right back, I promise." Alois smiled, but his eyes were void of emotion. He stood up, getting his shoes back on his feet and walking out to the garage where he heard the familiar sound of glass breaking coming from inside.

It wasn't long after he had pulled the garage door open until he found the man slumped down against the wall in one of the corners. He looked like his usual self, if you didn't count the bloodshot eyes and droopy eyelids. His mustache was neatly trimmed and his short blonde hair was pristinely combed and parted at the side. His grey suit fitted his well-kept form nicely, even if it was somewhat disheveled at the moment.  
  
"Dad?" Shattered glass was spread across the floor, crunching under Alois' sneakers as he took a step closer. The smell of scotch and sweat became heavy as he approached the man, making him sick to his stomach. "Are you drunk?"  
  
"Wh-what do you care, you-you piece of trash?" the man slurred, shifting on the dirty concrete and motioning for Alois to stay away. "I don't want you t-to come any closer!"  
  
Pale blue eyes stared up at his son, catching a flash of the once angelic child in Alois' features. In front of him now stood only the ungodly and vile remains of that pure being, and the small spark of fear in his eyes made old man Trancy even more appalled by his offspring.  
  
"What?" Alois bit his lip and shoved his hands down his pockets to hide the fact that they were trembling.  
  
"You're d-disgusting! A dirty little faggot!" The man scrambled to get to his feet, causing Alois to take a step back.  
  
"Who-who called you?"  
  
"What does it matter, huh?! I know all a-about your little boyfriend and y-your filthy activities. You're a disgrace." Finally standing up on wobbly legs, the man stumbled towards Alois just as a soft voice came from behind the silver Volvo.  
  
"Alois? Are you okay?"  
  
Alois whirled around, eyes wide and mouth open in a gasp. "Luka, get out of here!"  
  
"But I don't want-"  
  
"HE'S NOT GOING ANYWHERE! Get in the car i-if you know what's good for you, boy. And take your brother w-with you." With bright red cheeks and flaring nostrils, old man Trancy shortened the distance between him and his sons.  
  
"Take me and do whatever you want, but leave Luka out of it!" Alois snapped, backing up towards his brother.  
  
The eldest's eyes were filled with disgust as he glared at his firstborn, eying his unseemly shorts and cocky expression with a frown.  
  
"No, no, no, that's not happening." The man stepped closer to the boys and stopped at the back door of the car to open it. "GET. IN."  
  
"We had a deal," Alois seethed, shielding Luka who clung to the sleeve of his jacket.  
  
"THE DEAL IS OFF! I'll make that boy sorry if both of you d-don't get in this car right now! Do you hear me, _fag_?"  
  
Alois scowled at his father before he turned around, getting to eye level with Luka and taking both his hands in his. He spoke in a low voice, careful not to alert his father of his plan.  
  
"Let's get in the car and I'll text a friend, okay? He'll help us. I won't let dad hurt you."  
  
"O-okay..." Luka's voice was trembling and those big dark eyes were brimming with tears as he swallowed the lump in his throat.  
  
"Just be calm and quiet, can you promise me that? And if dad ever stops the car I want you to close your eyes and keep them closed. You can't open them until I get back inside."  
  
"But-"  
  
"Promise me." Alois gave Luka a grave look, feeling the boy shiver as he rubbed his hands with his thumbs.  
  
Lids trailed with thick lashes fell over glossy orbs, causing the tears to finally spill and roll down Luka's cheeks. "Okay... I promise."  
  
With a kiss to his brother's forehead, Alois rose to his feet and turned to his father. His hands were balled into fists and his eyebrows were bunched together as he seethed, "We'll go with you, but I'll kill you if you touch him."  
  
"Hah! Like you could kill me, you little brat! G-Get in, _now_."  
  
Alois reluctantly did as he was told, getting into the backseat with Luka and buckling both their seat belts. The car door was slammed shut before the front door was opened and the man got inside. The brothers entwined their fingers, the blonde lightly squeezing his brother's tiny hand as he gave him a reassuring smile.  
  
"We're going on a fun little ride, just us three. Like the good ol' days." Their father's voice was threatening as he turned the ignition and pulled out of the garage. As soon as they got out on the road and his father was forced to focus on the traffic, Alois dug through his pocket. He found his phone, being as inconspicuous as possible. With shivering fingers he typed a message, sending it quickly and pocketing the device just before the man glanced at the rear view mirror.  
  
**Alois:** _Dad's crazy. Call the police. We're in a silver Volvo. We just passed campus going towards the library._

* * *

Ciel was reading when he heard the ping, but his phone was plugged into the charger on the desk. With a small glance, he went back to his book, deciding to check the text later.  
  
After his rage fit, Lizzy had called him, calming him down with clichés like, ‘he would never cheat on you,’ and ‘there must be another explanation.’ But Ciel still needed to distract himself, and turned to one of his fantasy worlds to keep his destructive feelings at bay.  
  
Ciel was fighting so hard to divert his thoughts that he failed to realize that the person he had been waiting for all day to text him, just did.

* * *

"You're not trying anything funny, are you?"  
  
Alois knew his father was speaking to him and not to Luka. After a shaky breath he swallowed hard, meeting the male’s eyes and opening his mouth. "N-No. Where are we going?"  
  
"Wouldn't be a surprise if I told you, right? You'll see...you'll see."  
  
The speed limit didn't seem to apply to the eldest as he pressed down on the pedal, and his drunken state caused the car to wobble from time to time. Alois was beginning to worry but he dared not to look at his phone again since his father kept a watching eye on him.  
  
"Big bro... I'm scared," Luka sniveled, causing Alois' heart to bang against his ribcage.  
  
"Shh-"  
  
"You're s-scared?" their father mocked, hiccupping as he pulled the window down to spit. "Time to grow up and act like a man! What are you now – ten? Playtime’s over, kid!"  
  
Alois jumped when his father started laughing, and got even more concerned when the man completely turned his head away from traffic.  
  
"Today, kids. Today's the day. Yes siiiree! You're both-"  
  
"Dad, you should pay attention to the road." A bitten lip trembled as Alois stared ahead, avoiding his father's cloudy eyes.  
  
The intoxicated male looked from son to son, going back and forth between the two as he spoke and clenched the wheel harder in irritation.  
  
"TODAY is the day where you both will learn the biggest lesson you'll ever learn. Today-"  
  
"Dad-" Thin fingers gripped Luka's hand tighter as the car turned into the opposite lane without the driver's knowledge.  
  
"WILL YOU SHUT U-"

Alois gasped and squinted as two headlights shone in through the windshield and the sound of a horn drowned his father’s voice.  
  
"DAD!"

* * *

_The dragon breathed fire over the already singed grass and the thick cloud of smoke that followed caused the knights to fall to the ground._  
  
Ciel was tense atop the sheets, completely engaged in the story. Concentrated eyes were glued on the page, but a sudden sound brought him back to reality.  
  
His phone was ringing on the desk.  
  
He ignored the shrill tone, returning to his book with furrowed brows, annoyed that someone interrupted him.  
  
_The group of fearsome men scrambled to their feet, drawing their swords as they carefully stepped over the charred ground. The dragon huffed, sending a low growl-_

_Alois._  
  
Ciel spat out a curse, rolling out of bed just as the ringtone died out. When he grasped the device his stomach was already painfully contracted, and his heart was beating so hard that the drumming of the muscle drowned out all other sounds.  
  
"Alois," he whispered as he read the text, every exhale shaky as he fumbled with his fingers over the screen. He lifted his phone to his ear as he clenched his eyes shut, praying to God that the blonde would pick up.  
  
_"Hi biyaatch! You've reached Alois mothafuckin' Trancy. Leave a message, or don't, I don't really care. Beep."_  
  
"No, please, no." Ciel swallowed the lump in his throat, stifling a whimper as he called 911.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you liked this chapter even if it was a little short.
> 
> If you have any questions, don't be afraid to ask :)


	24. Chapter 24

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry this took so long. The last few weeks haven't exactly been the best for me =/ But now it's here! I really really hope you like this chapter. I love all of you, don't you dare forget it :*

There comes a time in every man's life where he gets a chance to show his true colors; a test of which he is facing with every inch of his soul and sanity at stake.  
  
Ciel was standing at that edge now, peering over and gazing upon the vast maze of possible paths.  
  
And Ciel jumped.  
  
Before Alois came into his life he had it all planned out. He was going to become a writer and live a calm and normal life. Lizzy was going to be at his side the way she always had been; supporting and loving.  
  
Ciel's life was not supposed to be crazy, dramatic, exhausting, or...  
  
Exciting beyond belief.   
  
He was 19 years old, and not one second of his life had been spent thinking he would ever end up like this: living a life that had him burning like the brightest star. He had always viewed himself as the shy mouse in the corner, but now he was among those who sparkled.  
  
Alois was a breath of fresh air, albeit tiring at times. But even if Ciel was fed up on occasion, it was all worth it, seeing him smile, hearing him laugh, watching him dance like an angel ready to sprout wings whenever he was happy.  
  
It was not supposed to end up like this. Ciel had changed his entire plan; he had altered his view on every aspect of his time on earth the moment he realized that he had fallen for Alois.  
  
Everything that had happened the last tumultuous year of his life was not supposed to end with him holding his lifeless boyfriend in his arms.

* * *

"ALOIS!" Ciel shouted, tumbling out of Sebastian's car before it had come to a complete stop. Unsteady legs hit hard asphalt as the younger male stumbled and fell to his hands and knees.   
  
"Ciel, what the-" Sebastian dropped the wheel, long fingers fumbling with the seatbelt as he watched his brother get to his feet and take off running.  
  
Ciel's lungs were burning as he ran as fast as his legs could carry him towards the blinking lights. His lean limbs were getting filled with adrenaline so fast that when he finally reached the wrecked Volvo, he barely managed to stop his legs from moving forward.  
  
He almost smashed right into the ambulance driver, his fingers reaching out for the vehicle as he screamed at the top of his lungs.  
  
"ALOIS! WHERE ARE YOU, FUCKING ANSWER ME, ALOIS!"  
  
"CIEL, CALM DOWN!" Sebastian caught up to his younger sibling, his hand only nudging Ciel's shoulder before it was ripped right off.  
  
"DON'T TOUCH ME I NEED TO FIND HIM-" Ciel took another leap towards the car, but strong arms were quick to trap his torso and hold him back.  
  
"Ciel-"  
  
"DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND – I NEED HIM!" Ciel's voice broke, his frail chest rising and sinking just as fast as his racing heart. His throat was aching as he struggled with every bit of strength he possessed, but Sebastian wouldn't let him go.

The older brother sighed. “I know you do, but you’re not helping anyone by running over there in this state.”  
  
Several police cars and a second ambulance arrived at the scene as the brothers stared at the two cars that had collided. People started yelling orders as car doors were opened and slammed shut, but Ciel could only focus on how the sirens made the shattered glass glitter in the absence of sunlight.  
  
Ciel gulped as the paramedics pulled out a body from the wreckage. But he wasn't interested in finding out who it was as the person had been sitting in the other vehicle.  
  
"WHY AREN'T THEY DOING ANYTHING!? ALOIS IS IN THE VOLVO, JUST LET ME GO!"  
  
"I'll let you go if you calm down. You have to let the paramedics do their job," Sebastian said over Ciel's head, dark eyes staring straight ahead as he tightened his grip on the writhing form of his brother.  
  
"Okay, okay, just—PLEASE!"   
  
The desperation in Ciel's voice was heart-wrenching. Sebastian could hear that he was close to tears and realized that he hadn't heard his baby brother cry since he was a little kid. The male exhaled a long sigh, and let his arms fall to his sides. Ciel bolted the second he was free, and Sebastian watched as he came to an immediate halt at the driver's side of the demolished car.  
  
There was blood pouring out of the front door of the Volvo, and as Ciel stepped closer his eyes fell on the mutilated remains of who he assumed was Alois' father. The driver of the other car had met the same fate, crushed by the force of the collision.  
  
It felt like his heart was about to pulverize his ribs by the way it slammed against them. Ciel had never seen a dead person before but not a single part of him cared to linger for more than two seconds as his whole body was screaming for him to get inside that car.  
  
Quivering fingers grasped the handle of the back door, the tinted windows giving him absolutely no clue as to what was going on in there. All around him people rushed, yelled, cried. Everything was a blur; he didn't see them, he didn't hear them.  
  
Ciel yanked the door open, breath stuck behind the thick lump in his throat. A single drop of sweat rolled over his forehead as his eyes opened as wide as they could get.  
  
"No." The word was barely a word. It was an exhale of air that drained from his lungs just as fast as the color drained from his cheeks.  
  
The longest second of Ciel's life passed as his gaze fell on Alois. His face was covered in blood as red as roses, and once blonde hair was drenched in the color and sticking to his temple. The most pained whimper fled Ciel's lips before he went for the seatbelt. Luka was unconscious beside the blonde, but he was breathing. Alois wasn't.  
  
Ciel was shaking hard as he freed his boyfriend and pulled him out of the vehicle. He ended up sitting on the ground, surrounded by broken glass, holding Alois like an infant. Everything was a haze. He didn't know what to do.  
  
As Ciel shook his boyfriend he started screaming for help, and the first one there was his brother.  
  
"Is he alive?" Sebastian huffed before he came to a halt, his dark hair ruffling in the cool breeze as he leaned down over the body.  
  
"I-I don't know—I don't-"  
  
"Hey just take a deep breath." Sebastian got down on his knees and pressed two fingers to Alois' neck.  
  
Small hands clenched the blonde's blood-stained jacket, the fabric serving as Ciel's only link to reality as he felt like the world was fading all around him.   
  
"Is he-"  
  
"Shh." Sebastian stared into nothing as he felt for a pulse, eyebrows bunching together in concentration.  
  
Ciel’s mouth fell open as he noticed the faintest lift of the blonde’s torso. "Wait, I think he's breathi-"  
  
"C-Ciel," Alois rasped, blue eyes fighting to open as Ciel gasped at the body in his arms.  
  
"Alois, you're okay, you're-"  
  
"I...I-" The blonde started coughing, dry lips ripping open to splatter blood all over Ciel's hands.  
  
"Don't talk." Ciel whipped his head to Sebastian, but his brother was already gone, far away and hollering for medical assistance. His bottom lip trembled as he once again looked down at his boyfriend, using his sleeve to wipe away some of the blood from around his mouth.

“Alois… I’m so sorry. I thought…” Ciel squeezed his eyes shut, wet lashes casting long shadows over his cheeks as he choked back a sob. “I should’ve trusted you, please, I’m sorry…” As his lids lifted he felt like he was to blame for the injuries on Alois’ face. The crimson pouring out of the several gashes and cuts made him want to close his eyes again because those wounds wouldn’t be there if it weren’t for him. If only he had trusted his boyfriend, he wouldn’t have been in bed ignoring his phone; he might’ve been able to send help sooner.

“Ciel…” The blonde’s voice was a mere whisper, a puff of air being forced from weak lips.

Seeing him like this made Ciel want to scream because he was so, so scared. He was shaken to the core with fear of losing Alois, and it was physically painful to watch his body grow weaker by the second.  
  
"Prom-promise..." One arm hung limply at Alois' side as the other lifted to take a feeble grip on Ciel's scarf. "Promise..."  
  
"No, no, don't talk. They'll come to help you soon. Just hold on for a couple more seconds, just-"  
  
Alois looked Ciel dead in the eye as a drop of blood spilled from the corner of his lips and ran down his cheek.  
  
"Promise me y-you'll take care-" He had to pause to cough, and Ciel thought his heart would break as he cupped the blonde’s face. "Take care of Luka."  
  
Ciel stopped breathing. "No."  
  
"P-Promi-"  
  
"No! You'll take care of him just fine! Stop talking like that!" Ciel wasn't aware of his tears until they fell on the blonde's face. Big pearls landed on the once porcelain skin to mix with the dried blood that tainted it. "You're n-not going anywhere—Alois-"  
  
Heavy lids fell over those mesmerizing orbs, hiding the summer sky that Ciel needed so badly.  
  
"NO! ALOIS!" he yelled as he shook the blonde, his body like a ragdoll in his embrace. Ciel couldn't feel a thing except for panic; his limbs were numb and so was his mind. Tears poured from his eyes as he looked for even the faintest reaction, but the blonde remained unresponsive. "ALOIS, PLEASE!"  
  
The next couple of minutes were a blur. Paramedics rushed to the scene and ripped Alois from Ciel's arms, lifting him up on a stretcher. Ciel was screaming and crying, and Sebastian had to hold him from running after the blonde as they rolled him into an ambulance.  
  
Sebastian whirled his brother around to look him in the eyes. "Ciel... you have to let them do their job."  
  
"But-"  
  
"They will do everything they can. Now get in the car, they just drove off with Luka. I'll take you to the hospital."

* * *

"How's Luka doing?" Finny slumped down on the soft chair next to Ciel, eyebrows slanted in genuine concern. The legs of the chair screeched against the floor as thin fingers curled around the armrests to move it closer to his slouching friend.  
  
"Last I heard he was doing okay," Ciel murmured, gaze facing straight ahead. His elbows were pressing into tired knees as he rested his chin on his palms. "He hasn't spoken much though. He just needs time to get used to everything."  
  
Turquoise eyes rolled over the ragged male, and Finny scrunched his nose as they fell on his hair. It looked like it hadn't been washed in a week. Ciel's clothes consisted of worn-out sweatpants and a dark green hoodie, and as Finny noticed the stains on the front he tried to remember for how long he had been wearing them.  
  
"That's great, but uhm, Ciel..." Finny was waiting for his friend to look at him, but his eyes remained glued on the bed in front of them. "If you want to take a shower or something, I'd be happy to stay here and keep an eye on him."  
  
"No."  
  
"But Ciel-"  
  
"I said no."  
  
Finny breathed out a deep sigh, and lifted a hand to place on Ciel's shoulder. "You have to take care of yourself. Do you really want him to see you like this?" His eyes rolled over Ciel's dirty clothes. "And you've barely eaten anything since the accident. It's been two weeks, Ciel. You can't sit here forever."  
  
"I need to be here when he wakes up." Ciel's voice was emotionless as he kept staring at the body in the bed.   
  
At Alois.  
  
In a mess of white sheets, the blonde – his boyfriend – laid so still that he almost looked dead. Once pink lips were pale and motionless, missing that smirk they so often wore. Alois’ whole spirit seemed to have left him at the accident, because his skin had been void of color ever since.  
  
The life was drained from the once vibrant young man, and all that was left was a weak body. And the tired mess of bones and flesh that sat day after day just watching him was fading too. With each passing day Ciel grew less and less responsive, as if he was giving up hope little by little.  
  
Two weeks.  
  
Alois had suffered a blow to head; that's what the doctors said. They couldn't tell him when – or if – the blonde would wake up, and Ciel had stopped asking.  
  
The first week must've been a pain for the nurses and doctors the way Ciel had been bugging them for details on Alois' condition. But as the large wound on his forehead started healing, as his bruises faded, as the cuts on his once milky skin repaired themselves, Ciel lost his spark. Watching that flawless angel heal on the outside as the inside made no signs of ever finding its way back to the present was tearing him apart.  
  
Two males, one awake and well and the other stuck in limbo; so close yet so far apart. It was a heartbreaking sight to say the least. The nurses barely spoke to Ciel anymore as he lost the will to respond days ago.  
  
Sebastian and Finny came by on a daily basis, checking in on Ciel to make sure he ate and took care of himself. But he didn't want to; he didn't care. He felt empty.  
  
Late last night, Ciel had crawled into Alois' bed, careful not to nudge his broken arm. The cast was cluttered by get-well messages in an array of colors, put there by his and Ciel's friends. And Ciel had gulped, trying to swallow the lump that grew in his throat when he acknowledged the fact that Alois might never see them.  
  
He had lifted the thin blanket and draped it over both of them just to feel his boyfriend's warmth. But the blonde was too cold for it to feel good and Ciel had shivered because it had felt like he was hugging Alois for the last time.  
  
Weak limbs had held the comatose body nonetheless, clinging onto it like it was the only thing that mattered. And it was. Ciel had been so frightened as he inhaled the scent of hospital soap from Alois' disheveled hair. His eyes had clenched, his fists had closed around the loose hospital gown, gripping the fabric with all his might. His body had started shaking as he buried his face in that smooth neck and cried for the first time since the accident.  
  
And he had whispered.  
  
A broken, anguished whisper.  
  
"Y-You have to wake up. You have to. I-I can't... I can't lose you. Please. Alois, please."  
  
Ciel had been alone with his thoughts for two weeks, imagining Alois disappearing from him over and over again. It finally became too much.  
  
"Goddammit Alois! Why!? Why didn't you tell me you were going to your dad? I could've helped you—fuck!"  
  
The moon had shone in through the crack in the curtains, faintly illuminating the room as trembling lips pleaded. Ciel's sobs had only become louder and his stomach convulsed even harder as he poured his soul out to the lifeless body of the only person that had ever managed to make him feel alive.  
  
"Fuck... A-Alois...please. Don't leave me, Alois... I-I need you..."  
  
...  
  
..  
  
"Why did you make me love you if you're just going to give up and leave?"

* * *

Finny picked up his phone, speaking in a low voice as he held it as close as possible to his mouth. "Hey Lizzy. You gotta help me here."  
  
"Why? Is something wrong?! DID SOMETHING HAPPEN TO ALOIS?" she yelled into Finny's ear, forcing him to rip the device from his ear.  
  
"You don't have to scream," Finny hissed, frowning as he once again moved the phone closer to the side of his face.  
  
"Sorry, sorry. What is it?"  
  
"I've been here for over two hours, trying to get Ciel to eat, or shower, or even move! He hasn't eaten anything in two days. I don't know what to do."  
  
Lizzy sighed. "I'll be right there. I'll bring some cheesecake from that bakery he loves."  
  
"Yes, please hurry if you can. I can't stand seeing him like this."  
  
With a sullen expression, Finny hung up and strolled back inside the room, dragging his tired feet behind him as he prepared to lay eyes on his friend once again. Ciel was sitting on that same chair, blue orbs still fixed on the blonde, chin still perched on his hands.  
  
Finny decided it would be smartest not to open his mouth again, worried that he might provoke Ciel in some way if he did. All he wanted was to put a smile on his friend’s face, but after trying and failing over ten times during his visit he had finally given up. Lizzy would arrive shortly, and he had both fingers and toes crossed that she would be able to cheer Ciel up.  
  
After ten minutes she finally stepped through the doorway, her long blonde ponytail bouncing with each step as she approached the males. Graceful hands held a brown paper bag and a large leather purse, and as she came to halt in front of Ciel her green eyes shot lightning bolts straight at his blank face.  
  
"I brought you lemon cheesecake and you better eat it or I'll stuff it down your throat!" She shoved the bag into Ciel's lap before she straightened her back and folded her arms over her chest. "Go on. I won't move until you've eaten the entire thing."  
  
Ciel's view was blocked by white jeans and a sequined pink top that irritated his eyes with the way it sparkled. "I'll eat your damn cake if you move out of the way," he snarled, extending an arm to try and shove her aside.  
  
"This isn't healthy, Ciel! You don't have to stare at him 24/7. You can afford to look away for two seconds to eat or..." Her lips showed her disgust as she looked at Ciel's hair and took a strand between her fingers. "Take a shower. It looks like you've bathed in butter."  
  
A soiled boot came to push at Lizzy's thigh and the horrified squeal that followed had both Ciel and Finny covering their ears.  
  
"CIEL! These jeans cost 200 dollars!"  
  
"So?" he spat, scowling as he glared up at her. "I don't give a shit about your pants or your food or your fucking pity! Just leave me the hell alone!"  
  
Both Lizzy and Finny stared at Ciel as he shot up from the chair, shoved the bag back into Lizzy's hands and stomped over to the hospital bed. His outburst rendered them in shock because Ciel showed more emotions now than he had done for the entire two weeks he had spent inside that room.  
  
A few minutes went by where no one said anything. Ciel sat atop the mattress, listening only to the faint breaths of Alois. Lizzy and Finny stood behind him, looking at each other with frustrated concern.  
  
"I didn't mean to lose my temper like that..." Ciel finally murmured, squeezing Alois' hand under the blanket. "I just... I want to be alone."  
  
Lizzy took a deep breath, resisting the urge to hug her ex-boyfriend. "If that's what you need. But promise me you'll eat something, okay?"  
  
"Yeah I promise," Ciel lied because he had no appetite what so ever. But the toilet bowl could surely go for some cheesecake once his friends had left.  
  
"Okay. We love you," Lizzy choked out, voice cracking as she was close to tears.  
  
"I'll be back tomorrow," Finny said in a soft tone as he shuffled Lizzy towards the door. "Be sure to get some sleep."  
  
After his friends had left, Ciel placed his head on his boyfriend's chest, listening to the slow drumming of his heart. Ciel had never thought he would ever feel this strongly about anyone, and he wasn't sure if he had known just how intense his feelings were until he almost lost him. His love for Alois had been unknown to him until he was on the brink of death, and as he kept teetering on that edge Ciel realized just how much the blonde had changed his life to the better.  
  
He couldn't bear losing him. Not now. He had to get him back. He had to-  
  
"You smell like shit."  
  
Dark locks jerked away from the sound of soft breaths and pumping blood to locate the source of the voice. Ciel’s own heart thumped so hard it could break ribs as he felt the body squirming underneath him.  
  
"Alois?!"  
  
"God Ciel. When was the last time you took a shower?"  
  
Ciel's eyes were so wide they nearly popped out of their sockets as he slowly turned to stare right at the blonde. Dry lips opened and he near hyperventilated as thick lashes fluttered and lifted to reveal those brilliant orbs of ice for the first time in two weeks. Ciel's tongue was thick in his mouth as Alois groaned and rubbed his left eye. He couldn't get another word out he was that overwhelmed.  
  
"Are you just going to stare at me or...?" The blonde made an attempt to smile, but flinched as a pained whimper fled his pallid lips. "Man... That car must've done quite a number on me. Feels like my head is cracked open." His healthy arm lifted to let fingertips brush over the bandages, and if it hadn't hurt, he would've raised his eyebrows in concern. "Is it!?"  
  
Ciel blinked as the blonde spoke with panic in his voice, and was finally able to form a sound. "H-huh?"  
  
"Is my head cracked open, Ciel?!"  
  
"No," Ciel was quick to respond, shaking his head, "you're fine, you're healing. But… your mind went away for a while." Shock was still clinging onto him; he didn't know what to say or how to react. He had imagined this moment so many times, but now that it was actually happening he acted like his mind was on another planet.  
  
"For how long? Don't tell me I'm one of those people who's been in a coma for 25 years. Am I old as hell?!" Nervous fingers came to examine every bump and every slope of the blonde's face, searching for any abnormalities or deformities. All Alois found were some cuts on his cheeks, now close to healed and faintly visible.  
  
"No, you're not old." Ciel finally smiled; it was tiny but it was there. As the shock began to settle, he was flooded with emotions, and they were so intense that he started trembling from head to toe. "I-It's only been two weeks."  
  
"Thank god, I would—baby?" Alois reached for Ciel's forearm, softy grasping the quivering limb. "What's wrong?" As Ciel's breaths started hitching out and his eyes clenched shut, reality finally caught up to Alois. He had been in a coma for two weeks, and Ciel had probably been worried sick. With slanting lips, the blonde watched his disheveled boyfriend, realizing that it must've destroyed him not knowing if he'd wake up or not.  
  
Despite the pain and stiffness in his body, Alois eased his hands under Ciel's arms, pulling him closer to hold him tight. Those dark locks stuffed into his neck as he stroked them and whispered into the messy head of hair.  
  
"I'm okay... you don't have to worry anymore." Alois chewed on his lip as his boyfriend clung onto him, feeling his shoulder getting wet as Ciel silently cried. Cold fingers played over a hot neck as the blonde kissed the top of the other’s head, his eyes burning and his chest aching with emotions as memory after memory came back to him. "I love you too by the way. So fucking much."  
  
Those words had Ciel going completely still for a second. But then he lifted his head to hover over the blonde's face.  
  
"What?"  
  
Alois brushed away his boyfriend's tears with a gentle thumb. "I heard you. I heard everything you said to me while I was asleep."  
  
Ciel's face was heating up, the color spreading over tear-stained cheeks as he fixated his gaze on Alois' collarbones. "Everything?"  
  
"Don't be embarrassed. Everything you said was beautiful." The color was slowly returning to the lips that now curled into a sweet smile. "So my dad's dead, huh? Or did I dream that?" The blonde tried to sound sorry, but he didn’t fool anyone. Everything his father had put him through over the years had eliminated even the tiniest bit of love he used feel for the man as a little boy.  
  
Ciel shook his head, thinking that it sure felt like _he_ was dreaming right now. "No, you didn't dream that. And Luka-"  
  
Alois' mouth fell open in a gasp. "He was in the car..." It was as if he had forgotten about the fact that his younger brother had been sitting next to him when the accident had happened. With a shaky inhale of air, the blonde panicked and tried to sit up, forcing Ciel to move away from him. "Is he dead too?"  
  
"Hey, hey, calm down," Ciel said as the blonde made an attempt to frown. "Luka's just fine."  
  
Alois closed his eyes and let out a deep sigh of relief. "Thank god. Where is he? Is he hurt?"  
  
"He broke a few ribs and had a concussion, but he's up and running now. He's living with a foster family since they couldn't find any other relatives than you."  
  
"Oh," Alois murmured, fiddling with the IV-needle in his hand as his eyes wandered over the words on his cast. "Where's he going to live later on?"  
  
"I'm not sure. I think they're waiting for you to wake up and make a decision.”

Alois blinked in surprise and swallowed hard as Ciel brushed his fingers over his. “Me?! But I’m… I can’t do that.”

“You don’t have to think about that right now. Just focus on getting better.”

“O-okay…” The blonde turned his head to the side, trying to calm his anxious heart. He felt Ciel enclose his hand with his digits, squeezing carefully.

A minute ticked by in silence where Ciel rubbed his eyes and tried to organize the disarray of emotions rushing around inside him. His Alois was _awake_. It still felt like he was dreaming.

“Ciel?”

“Hm?” As he rolled his eyes up to look at the blonde, Ciel was surprised to see such a playful expression on his face. Alois looked like he was up to no good, finally giving Ciel that smirk he had missed so much.

“How long am I supposed to wait for you to kiss me? I thought you loved me.”

Ciel was a little taken aback by the question, but he had no time to gather his thoughts before the blonde grasped his collar and pulled him closer. Hearts were beating fast as their noses touched, both males staring at one another as Alois gave his boyfriend’s bottom lip a light nip.

“You have no idea how much I’ve missed you,” Ciel breathed before he folded his arms around the blonde’s neck and pressed his lips against his.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Iiiiiiihhh just one chapter left. Please leave a comment and let me know what was going through your head while reading :3


	25. Chapter 25

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don’t know what to say. This is the last chapter (or epilogue rather). I finished something. Wow. It’s all thanks to you guys, I hope you all know that. The best part of writing this story has been reading your comments and knowing how my story has touched you. Thank you so much.
> 
> Special thanks to Suzume, Lexxi, Nikki, and Paige for editing and for being wonderful and supportive.
> 
> And thank you B, Florry, Griffen, Jess, Kim, and Sara for being my best friends and for not getting sick of me constantly talking about my fanfics.
> 
> I love all of you.

**EPILOGUE**

Alois was a man now. And as a man he was obligated to take responsibility for his life, to act as an adult is expected to. In all honestly, the male had never imagined himself as a grown up. And being alone to take care of his younger brother while still being in college was something he didn't consider himself fit for.  
  
Ciel had told him that admitting your own shortcomings is a part of being a responsible adult. After a few weeks of pondering on the matter, Alois had agreed, realizing that choosing the best path for Luka was the right thing to do, even if that meant they wouldn't be living together.  
  
Luka was now staying with a loving family not more than ten minutes from campus, and they still saw each other on a regular basis. It couldn't have turned out better than it did.  
  
Ciel's old nemesis - the menacing male known as Claude - had received a taste of his own medicine after the incident with Alois' father. Not only had the blonde completely destroyed his ex’s brand new car in a fit of rage, but he had also called Claude's mother, telling her all about what he had done. She had not gone easy on him, cutting him off completely from her monthly financial assistance and leaving him with no other choice than to move to a shabby apartment which he had to share with three other people.  
  
Even if Ciel usually did his best to keep Alois away from behavior like that, he had been too pleased watching Claude suffer to do anything to stop his boyfriend. The result had been better than he could’ve ever imagined. Claude hadn't spoken to either of them in almost a year.  
  
It had been a calm year. Ciel and Alois had spent their time bonding over the events that almost ripped them away from each other. Everything they had been through had brought them closer together, and imagining life before they met had become close to impossible. They were like two peas in a pod; they were practically joint by the hip.  
  
But even though they were so close, even though their feelings for each other were stronger than ever, Alois would’ve never expected what happened next.  
  
Thick strands of blonde whisked over a delicate neck as Alois whipped his head in the direction of the door. The knock had startled him a bit, ripping his eyes away from his English notes. He wasn't expecting anyone, and Timber was gone for the weekend, which made him wonder who could be disturbing him at 9 PM without an invitation.  
  
"Come in!" he called, sighing once he realized the person on the other side wasn't going to let themselves in. Alois hopped down from the bed with a low thud, moving his tired feet in the direction of the door.   
  
The purple fabric of his oversized sweatshirt almost covered his entire bum; only the hem of his small black shorts was visible beneath the large sweater. He didn't wear any stockings today, or socks of any kind for that matter; he didn't think he had anyone to dress up for.  
  
As he opened the door, pale lips separated to voice his annoyance. However, he was met with nothing but an empty hallway. Grabbing the doorframe, Alois stuck his head out and scoured his surroundings.  
  
"Hello? Who the fuck knocked on my door?" After not receiving an answer, the blonde groaned loudly and took a step back. "Real mature!"  
  
Slender fingers curled around the handle to slam the door shut, but just as he was about to do it he noticed a tiny black box on the floor.   
  
"What the-" Alois bent down and picked it up, looking it over in his palm. It was a little bigger than an ordinary ring box, and coated in thin velvet.  
  
Alois could hear his own heartbeat in his ears, his shivering hands failing several times to open the box in his excitement. After a deep breath he finally managed to crack the lid open, frowning as its content was revealed.  
  
Inside the box was a single key resting atop a small folded note. He pinned the paper between his fingertips, lifting it as pearly teeth began chewing on his bottom lip. As he unfolded the note a muted whimper fled his throat because what it said took him completely by surprise.  
  
_Will you move in with me?_  
  
Blue eyes widened, soon brimming with sparkling tears as the blonde stared at the note in near paralyzation.  
  
"Well, will you?" came a voice from the end of the hallway.  
  
Startled, Alois gasped and nearly dropped the box. But the sight of his boyfriend's smiling face had his heart swelling in his chest.   
  
"But... how-"  
  
Ciel slowly walked towards the blonde, fiddling with the left sleeve of his black button-up. "I signed a lease to an apartment yesterday. I want you to live there with me."  
  
Big pearls rolled down the blonde's cheeks as he clutched the box with a trembling fist. With eyes fixed on Ciel he let out a muffled sob. This might have been a small thing for some, but for Alois, who was used to being treated like something that could easily be thrown away, it was the most amazing thing he could imagine. It was the biggest commitment anyone had ever offered him.  
  
Two delicate hands lifted, thumbs brushing away some of the tears as Ciel gave his boyfriend a soft smile. "Alois, I know you like it here, but I want to let you know that if I could, I would never be apart from you. That's why I'm giving this to you. Will you consider it?"  
  
With one last glance at the key, the blonde closed the box and lifted blue orbs to gaze at Ciel. Nothing else mattered but the two of them and the offer hanging in the air. Alois was at a loss for words, probably for the first time in his life, but watching his boyfriend's adoring expression forced a whisper from his lips.  
  
"Babe... I love you."  
  
"But?"  
  
"No, no buts! I want to—I want it!"  
  
"You sure?" Ciel's brows came together in a frown as he lowered his arms to rest his hands on Alois' hips.  
  
The blonde blinked to prevent any more tears from forming before he swallowed hard and looked straight into his boyfriend's eyes. "I've never been more sure about anything in my life."  
  
It was a big step for both of them, and Ciel was nervous. But he wouldn't allow Alois to notice as he lifted his chin to brush his lips over his. "I'll let you decorate the place," he whispered, both sets of lips curving into smiles at his words.  
  
"Obviously. If it’d look anything like your dorm it would-"  
  
"Shut up." Ciel breathed out a soft laugh against the blonde's lips and gently squeezed his waist. "But no pink."  
  
Alois pouted. "Aaw... Not even Mr. Snuggly Puff?" he asked with a quick glance at the stuffed bear on his bed.  
  
"Snuggly Puff can come. And those pink shorts of yours. But that’s it."  
  
"I knew you liked them." Alois smirked as he folded his arms around Ciel's neck.  
  
Ciel only smiled, and gazed into his boyfriend’s adoring eyes as he leaned in for a kiss. But before their lips touched he whispered a set of words that made two more tears roll down the blonde's rosy cheeks.  
  
"I can't wait to wake up to your face every morning."

**THE END**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And here it ends. It was a fun ride. Once again, thank you all for being amazing. I couldn't have done this without you.
> 
> A little headcanon of mine is posted [here](http://touch-me-trancy.tumblr.com/post/141150655834/idwtwy-headcanon) if you want to read~ It's what I think will happen several years after this story ends.
> 
> I'll end this in Swedish.
> 
> Vi ses~


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